Hi
by Natascha Romanoff
Summary: It's 1944 and Steve meets a mysterious redhead at a bar in London and is immediately drawn to her.
1. Chapter 1

_I already published this little story in my one shot series but I decided to post it on its own._

* * *

_1944_

Steve almost felt guilty that he and Bucky had the evening off while brave soldiers fought on continental Europe to defeat Nazi Germany and Hydra, but it was also nice to have some drinks with his best friend after all the craziness of the last months. He was just glad that Buck was okay and looking forward to fight by his side. Just the way he always wanted it. He could finally serve his country.

Buck had chosen a bar and he followed him through the dark streets of London. It was already late and most people were at home or already in bars. Since May London was safe and people could continue with their lives. It was almost hard to imagine that there was a war in continental Europe. Steve planned to enjoy this night because they had no idea what would happen once they returned to Europe.

"Unbelievable." Bucky muttered next to him and Steve looked at him.

"What?"

"Those girls over there?" He pointed behind them at a group of young women who smiled when he looked at them. "They're not even looking at me! It's like I don't exist!"

Steve chuckled and shook his head in amusement. He hadn't thought about it when he'd agreed to do project Rebirth but it was nice that women were now looking at him, but then he remembered that they would have probably ignored him if he still looked like his old self. "Welcome to my old world."

"Yeah, yeah." Bucky grunted. "Once we're back home, _you _have to find me dates! But we're never double dating! I don't think my ego could take that."

_Home_. God, he would be like _this_ for the rest of his life. He could make it to thirty, go back to art school after the war. Maybe find a nice girl and marry her. There were so many possibilities for him now. But first he would make sure that he would earn that chance of a new future.

Bucky opened the door of the bar and Steve followed him inside. The bar was dark and full of smoke but it still was inviting. A few groups were sitting around tables but there weren't a lot of people here. He almost preferred it that way. Large crowds now reminded him of his show monkey days. He was just glad that Bucky hadn't seen him on stage. He would have never let him live that down.

They went to the counter and ordered two whiskeys. The bartender didn't have much to do and almost immediately gave them their order.

Steve raised his glass. "You ready to follow Captain America into the jaws of death?" He asked, half joking half serious. They had no idea what was waiting for them. And now it was his responsibility and duty to lead a group of brave and honorable men into combat.

"Hell no." Bucky chuckled. "That little boy from Brooklyn who was too dumb not to run from a fight- I'm following _him_."

He nodded and took a sip from his whiskey. It was good to know that Bucky still saw him just as Steve and not...not this _persona_. He just wanted to do what was right and was eternally grateful that he finally got the chance.

Steve looked over to the other side of the bar where a redheaded woman was sitting. She smirked and raised her martini glass before she looked away. He knew that he was blushing and stared into his whiskey.

"What's so interesting down there?" Bucky asked.

"Nothing." He looked up and judging by the knowing grin on his best friend's face he still had a pink face.

"Oh, I know that look. Did you see a pretty dame?" Bucky looked around until his gaze landed on the redhead. God, she was truly a vision. He wondered what her voice sounded like. He wanted to know her eye color because he couldn't tell from where he was sitting if her eyes were blue or green.

"Wow." Bucky whistled. "Who knew that the Brits had so swell gals!"

Did the woman hear Bucky because she looked into their direction again with a smirk on her beautiful face. God, she really had to be the most gorgeous girl he'd ever seen. Her smirk turned into a real smile when she looked directly at him. He couldn't help but smile back.

Bucky huffed. "Great another woman who pays no attention to me! I almost miss the days where you were a just a little punk. Now it's like I'm invisible!"

He couldn't really feel sorry for Bucky, not when the redhead was still looking at him. And she didn't just look at him like the chorus girls or the women who'd come to the shows, no it was almost like she _truly_ saw him. God, what was wrong with him? He didn't know the woman!

She stood up taking her drink with her and then she actually walked over. Bucky mumbled something under his breath and left him to go a table. The redhead was now standing next to him.

"Hi." She placed her drink next to his. God, her voice was so smooth and husky!

"Ma'am." He managed to get out and wished that the serum didn't just make him taller, but also gave him the ability to talk to women.

She seemed amused and pointed at the bar stool. "Can I join you?"

"Of course." He nodded and wanted to pull it out for her but she was faster.

"So you're a soldier, huh?" She said while she eyed his body and uniform.

"Yes, ma'am."

"Don't _ma'am_ me, I've just turned 20." She laughed and her laugh was beautiful.

"Sorry, ma-. Sorry. I'm Steve Rogers."

"Natalia." She said smoothly and held her hand out. He took it and her skin was soft. He probably held her hand longer than was socially acceptable and almost dropped it when he'd realized it. She chuckled and let her hands fall into her lap. She was wearing a dark green dress that accentuated the color of her hair perfectly and it clung nicely to her body. Not that he noticed that. And he finally knew her eye color. They were green, the prettiest green he'd ever seen since the serum had fixed his color blindness. "Last night before you're shipped off?"

"Something like that."

"Am I bothering you? I feel like I chased your friend away."

He looked for Bucky who was talking to a pretty blonde. "I think he's fine. And no, you're not bothering me." He wondered where she was from because her accent didn't sound British but it didn't sound completely American as well. "What brings you to London, Miss? If you don't mind me asking?"

"My family sent me to London since it seems safe now." She answered before taking a sip from her martini. "I'm from Russia though, if that's what you're asking. But I haven't been there in years."

"Your accent-"

"Yeah, my mother was American. She always spoke English with me. Have you ever been to Europe before?"

"No." He laughed. "I could have never afforded it. I always wanted to come though...I wish circumstances were different..."

"Yeah." She nodded. "War seems so idiotic. Regimes fall everyday. Just look at my country and what happend to the house of Romanov. The Nazis will learn that lesson as well. Nothing lasts forever."

The way she talked...she almost seemed sad. "Are you all alone here in London?"

She raised an eyebrow. "Why are you asking? You're trying to abduct me?"

"What? No!"

She laughed. "I was just kidding. Yes, it's just me. I kinda like it though. It's the first time I'm _really_ on my own." Her beautiful eyes appeared to be clouded for a second. "The house was quite full and strict that I grew up in. Where are you from? America is quite big, isn't it?"

"Brooklyn, New York. Born and raised." He said, proudly.

"You always wanted to be a soldier? Risk your life for your country?" The way she said it, it almost sounded like she was mocking him,

"Yes. It's an honor to fight alongside my fellow men. We're fighting for a good cause. To free people from tyranny. To give them back their freedom. I just wanna help people."

She brushed a strain of hair behind her ear. "I don't mean to offend you, Steve." She used his first name like they'd known each other for years. Wait, did he even know her last name? "You'd be surprised how many soldiers are just in it for the fame and the girls. They don't really take it seriously. Speaking of girls, is there one waiting for you at home?" She asked with a grin.

"No." He answered with pink cheeks. "No one ever looked twice at me."

Her eyebrows almost reached her hairline. "What? Are American girls blind?"

"No." He said, almost bitterly. "Definitely not. I didn't always look like this. I...I was kind of... a late bloomer."

"So what? I consider myself a good judge of character and you seem like a good guy. Your eyes never once dropped to my neckline. I'm almost offended actually."

Now he was fully blushing and Natalia laughed. "I'm sorry?"

She was smiling at him. "And you're sweet. Almost adorably cute."

"Yeah, well...women don't seem to like that."

"Then they're morons! But maybe I should be thankful for that or otherwise you would have a girl waiting for you and wouldn't be talking to me." She said with a wink. Was she flirting with him? "What are you gonna do when the war is over?"

"I'm an artist...well, not really." He added quickly when he saw her face light up. "I mean I went to art school for a year and do sketches but it would be great to do it professionally. But I also wouldn't mind staying in the Army. " Could he even just leave the Army after the war? Wouldn't that be selfish? Living a civilian life even though he had all these abilities now?

Natalia reached into her purse and handed him a pen. She shoved her napkin over to him. "Can you draw me something?"

"Um...uh, what? What do you want me to draw?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "Anything. I'm not picky. Hey, maybe you'll be a great artist one day and I can sell it." She grinned and he huffed a laugh out. That was more than unlikely but why not humor her. He thought about it for a moment and then started to move the pen over the napkin. He shoved it back to her after he was done, unable to look into her eyes.

"Is that me?" She breathed out and he looked up at her. Her cheeks were flushed and he couldn't quite tell what she was thinking. "Thank you. It's really beautiful."

"I had a beautiful model." He blurted out and his eyes widened in shock. _Jesus Christ!_

Natalia's cheeks turned even redder. "You're sweet. Thank you. I don't think I've never met such a nice boy before." She said and now _she_ sounded almost bitter. He almost asked what that meant because the way he saw it, Natalia should only meet men who treated her well and with respect. He would always treat her with admiration and respect. God, where was he going with this?! He just met her and he was going back to the front in two days.

"What do you want to do?" He asked her.

"Right now, I'm just doing...jobs that... present itself. Someone has a task for me and I'll do it. But I always wanted to be a ballerina. I have the training but...well, it will never happen." She said with sad smile.

"Maybe once the war is over and everything is kind of back to normal? You could go to Paris." He would love to see her dance one day. He was sure that she would make a great ballerina.

"No. That's never gonna happen for me. My path is already made." She moved her hand forward and her pinky touched his. She seemed to have done it unintentionally but she didn't move her hand away. Did she feel that spark too, once their fingers started touching?

"I'd love to see you dance, Natalia."

"That's the first time you said my name." She smiled and placed her hand on his. God, he hoped that she wouldn't notice his goosebumps. "What's your favorite childhood memory?"

"Huh?" Where was that coming from? "Um...Oh, I know! I was fourteen and I saved enough money to take my mother to dinner for her birthday. It was nothing fancy, just some diner and we had burgers and milkshakes...but she looked so happy. When I think of her, I'll always think of that day."

Natalia smiled softly. "That's a wonderful memory, Steve."

"What's yours?"

"It's probably silly. I think I was ten, maybe eleven and I had to walk through a forest to get to the next village and I was exhausted but I saw this deer right in front of me. We just looked at each other and I don't know...I've never felt that peaceful before or ever again. It's stupid."

"No, it's not."

She smiled a little. "Thank you."

She asked him all kinds of questions about America and his childhood but didn't really talk about herself. He wondered if she'd had a tough upbringing and didn't like to talk about her past. She did tell him a few things she'd seen in London.

"Okay guys, it's two am." The bartender suddenly yelled. "It's time for you to go home."

God, had he been talking to Natalia for three hours? He looked for Bucky who was making out with the blonde. What a surprise. They pulled apart. Bucky looked over to him. "I'm walking Lillian home. See you tomorrow!" He grinned and took the girl's hand who giggled, and they left the bar together.

"You want me to walk you home now that your pal ditched you?" Natalia asked amused.

Steve laughed. "That's nice. Do you want me to walk you home?" She raised an eyebrow and looked amused. "I mean...I just want to make sure that you get home safely." He stuttered out. He didn't mean to imply anything else. That wasn't him.

Natalia looked like she wanted to decline his offer, but then she nodded. "That's very sweet of you. Thank you." They paid (Natalia wouldn't let him pay for her drinks) and he helped her into her coat before they left the bar as well.

The guesthouse she was staying at was only a ten minute walk away. She'd looped her arm through his during their walk and his heart started fluttering. Did the few people who saw them thought that they were a couple? Natalia asked him about his mother and the way she reacted almost made him think that she'd grown up without one. But she'd said that her mother had been American and taught her English...

"This is me." She stopped and tilted her head towards the house behind them. "Thank you for getting me home safely."

"You're welcome."

She bit her lip and his gaze fell immediately to her mouth. "Would you think less of me if I kissed you right now, Steve Rogers?"

She wanted to kiss _him? _He'd never wanted anything more in his moment. Not even to join the army. "No, I-" He didn't come any further because she was already pressing her lips against his. At first very carefully but then she cupped his face and moved her lips eagerly against his. His hands landed on her waist and he pulled her closer. So this was what all the fuss was about! He had to admit that kissing was really great! He could only focus on how soft her lips felt and how nice she smelled.

"Do you want to come up?" She whispered against his lips.

He gulped and took a step back. Was she...He'd never thought the day would come that something like this would happen to him. She smiled softly at him, her cheeks flushed and her pupils were so wide that he almost couldn't see the green of her eyes anymore. "Yes."

Her smile grew wider and she took his hand and they sneaked quietly up to her room.

* * *

Natalia was laying on her stomach on her bed and he drew circles on her naked and lightly sweaty back. He had slept with a woman. He'd never pictured it happening like this with a woman he'd just met, but it had felt right.

"Alright, I have a question for you, which you do not have to answer. I feel like if you don't answer it, though, you're kind of answering it, you know?" She turned her head to look at him.

"What?"

"Was that your first time?"

_Shit_. He thought that it had been good for her. "That bad, huh?" He asked quietly. He'd wanted her to feel as amazing as he had felt.

"No!" She said immediately and sat up rolling him on his back to hover over him. "It was amazing!" She said with a grin. "Don't worry about that! It was just...I don't now...You seemed so nervous and actually listened to me and my body to figure what I like. For a first time that was really impressive!"

"Yeah?"

"Mhm." She murmured and kissed him passionately. He wrapped his arms around her small waist and they kissed and kissed until they were both out of breath. "_Oh_." Natalia moaned. "Feels like you're ready for the next round."

Afterwards they were both panting and on their backs looking up at the ceiling. "You're a quick learner, Rogers." She chuckled and took his hand to lace their fingers together. "I'll give you that."

"Thanks?"

She grinned at him and kissed the back of his hand. "It's almost dawn." She whispered.

"Shit! I have to be at the barracks soon. I'm so sorry!" He didn't just want to leave like that. A part of him wanted to stay here with her. To stay here with her for good but he couldn't. And he probably shouldn't. "I...I'm leaving tomorrow."

"I understand."

"Can I...Can I see you again? Tonight? Or maybe-"

"I don't think that's a good idea." She interrupted him.

"Are you staying here for longer? Can I write you?"

Natalia sighed and let go of his hand. He felt like she'd slapped him. Had he been reading too much into this? "That's not a good idea. The best thing would be if you'd forget all about me."

"I don't think that's possible."

She smiled sadly. "You're such a sweet man, Steve. The girl you're gonna marry one day is very lucky." She cupped his face and kissed him. "I'll never forget you, Steve Rogers. But you should forget about me. It's better this way, believe me."

"Natalia-"

"If things were different...If I was different...I would write you and I would wait for you but...I could never be the right girl for you."

"I feel like there is something you're not telling me. Are you married?" Had he slept with a married woman? There had to be something because she wouldn't be acting like this if she'd just wanted to get rid of him.

"No, I'm not married. I wish I could tell you the truth, but you're better off not knowing, trust me." Her eyes were glistening but the tears were gone after she blinked. "You should leave now."

"Natalia-"

"Please just leave."

He didn't want to but he respected her wish even though he felt like she didn't want him to go. None of this made any sense. He got out of bed and back into his uniform. "I'll look for you once the war is over, Natalia."

"You don't even know my full name."

"I'll figure it out."

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "It's Natalia Romanova."

"Thank you." He didn't know how but he knew that it was a big gesture of trust that she'd told him that. "Thank you."

She stood up with the sheets wrapped around her naked body. She walked over to him and cupped his face with her small and soft hands. "You're one of a kind, Steve Rogers." She kissed him softly. "I'll never forget you."

"I'll find you. I won't stop until I find you and you can explain everything to me." He promised her fiercely. Maybe he was crazy, but he wanted a future with her.

"You shouldn't, but I want you to." She laughed quietly like she couldn't believe what she had just said. "Will you run away with me after you saved the world?"

"Yes."

She smiled and kissed him again. "Then you won't have to look for me. Let's meet one week after the war is officially declared over at our bar."

He nodded. "Yes. One week after the war is over."

She was basically beaming at him and his heart was racing. "And then we'll run away together. You're going to show me your Brooklyn?"

"I promise."

She kissed him again and he'd _never_ felt like this before. He barely knew her but he'd risk _everything_ for her. Was this what love at first sight felt like?

"Promise that you won't trust any Russians."

"What?"

"Promise me that you won't trust them. They are not just trying to defeat the Nazis."

What was she saying? What did she mean? How did she know this? Was she working for the Brits? It was crazy, but he trusted her. "I promise."

"Good." She almost looked relieved. "You have to go now before anyone sees you."

"Are you in danger?" The whole thing just felt...weird.

"No, but you might be."

"What? Come with me." He pleaded.

"No, I have to deal with a few things before we can run away together." She kissed him again and he knew it was a goodbye kiss. "I'll see you."

"Yes." He kissed her one last time and then walked to the door. She watched him with a smile and he nodded at her before he walked out of the room. God, he hoped the war would be over soon and Natalia would be waiting for him at the bar.

* * *

_2012_

He'd sacrificed his life and that fucking Tesseract was still a threat to the world. He'd died for _nothing_. He'd slept for seventy years and now he had to get the Tesseract back _a__gain__._ From a fucking alien. He'd missed living his life for _this_. God, he hated everything here. He'd waken up and his world was gone. His friends were dead. Everything was different and foreign to him. How was he supposed to catch up on seventy years?

He looked around the plane, a quinjet as Agent Coulson had explained, and thought about what else he'd lost. _Natalia._ He'd lost any chance of running away with her. Of being with her. Had she been at the bar one week after Japan had surrendered? Had she thought that he'd stood her up? Had she realized that he'd been gone? Dead? Had she found out that he had been Captain America? Had she been able to get away from whatever mess she had been in? Had she lived a good life? Had she been a ballerina?

"I gotta say it's an honor to meet you, officially." Agent Coulson interrupted his train of thoughts. Steve hoped the smile he was giving him was convincing. "I sort of met you, I mean, I watched you while you were sleeping. I mean, I was... I was present while you were unconscious from the ice. You know, it's really, it's just a... just a huge honor to have you on board."

He stood up. "Well, I hope I'm the man for the job." He had to focus on Loki and the Tesseract. He could wallow in self pity once he'd completed the mission. Maybe SHIELD could find out what had happend to Natalia. He just hoped that she'd lived a long and happy life.

The quinjet landed on the landing strip of the carrier and he followed Coulson down the ramp. He looked up from the ground and his heart almost stopped beating. No, that was not...Was he hallucinating? The woman standing at the end of the ramp looked _exactly_ like Natalia. But that was not possible! Was his mind playing tricks on him?

"Agent Romanoff." Coulson said and then pointed at Steve. "Captain Rogers."

_Romanoff_? That sounded a lot like _Romanova_. What the fuck was going on? Was she Natalia's granddaughter? Had Natalia found a man and started a family? His stomach twisted in knots at the thought even though he knew he had no right to feel like this.

"Ma'am?" He managed to say.

"Hi." Agent Romanoff said with a smile that lit up her whole face. And he _knew _in that moment with every fiber of his being that this _was _in fact Natalia. He didn't know how it was possible but that was his Natalia standing in front of him. Alive and barely looking a day older than the last time he'd seen her. "I thought we said one week and not almost seventy years, Steve Rogers."


	2. Chapter 2

They saved New York. Together they defeated Loki and his Chitauri and stopped an alien invasion. They had been things that bothered him, especially regarding Fury and SHIELD, but Natalia trusted him and the organization so he gave them the benefit of the doubt. _Natasha,_ her name was now Natasha, he reminded himself. They hadn't really had any chance to talk to each other, not without anyone listening and he wanted to talk to her in private. He had to know if she was involved with Agent Barton.

_Is that love, Agent Romanoff?_

_I owe him a debt. Love is for children._

What did that mean? Had she been lying to Loki? Had she been telling the truth? He could see that she cared a lot about Barton and he couldn't hold it against her if she'd fallen for him. Everyone thought that Steve had been dead. And how was she even alive?! How was that possible? God, his head hurt!

He went back to his apartment after the shawarma and the debriefing and let SHIELD and Stark deal with the press. Steve was in no mood to give a press conference or even talk to people. Too many thoughts were running through his head. Where did Natasha go after the debriefing? Was she with Barton? Taking care of him? Who was he to her? Just her friend, or her boyfriend? Maybe even her_ husband_? He hated himself for being jealous.

He took a hot shower and changed into sweatpants and a shirt and was about to make some tea when someone knocked on his door. Who could that be? He didn't want any company. Well, that wasn't entirely true. He walked to his front door and looked through the peephole. His heart started racing when he saw who it was.

He immediately opened the door to let her in. God, she was still so fucking beautiful. Her hair was shorter but besides that she still looked the same. She wasn't wearing any make up and wearing simple jeans and a top.

"Hi." She gave him a soft smile and his heart was fluttering. She was really here and alive. And she came to see him!

"Hey."

"Can I come in?"

He nodded and stepped aside. He noticed when she walked past by him that she had a file under her arm. She looked around his hallway and then turned to him.

"You probably have a lot of questions."

"Yeah, but...Can I..." God, he was suddenly so embarrassed.

"What?"

"Can I hug you?" He hadn't touched a human in forever and he missed it. The last time he'd hugged someone was Bucky shortly before he...before he'd died.

Natasha put the file on the small dresser in his hallway. "Of course." She held her arms open and he came willingly. He pressed her against his body and wrapped his arms tightly around her. He breathed her scent in and he didn't know who to thank but he was so fucking grateful that she was still here.

He felt her clutched the back of his shirt. "I never forgot you, Steve. They took everything away from me, but they could never take my memories of our night away."

_They? _What had happened to her? The things Loki had alluded to when he'd been talking to Natasha sounded...horrible. "The last thing I thought about before I went under-" He whispered into her hair. "Was you. And the first thing I thought about when I woke up was you. You are always on my mind."

Natasha pulled her head away from his chest and looked up at him. Her eyes were glistening and one of her hands moved to his neck. "Kiss me, please. Please kiss me before I tell you everything. Just kiss me, Steve."

He lowered his head and pressed his lips against hers. And for the first time in weeks he felt alive and not numb anymore. He was here with her and everything was okay. The kiss started slow and soft but soon they were kissing like their lives depended on it. He pressed her against the wall behind her and kissed her with everything he had. Natasha kissed him back eagerly and almost desperately and pulled him back every time he tried to pull away to let her get some air.

"_Natalia_." He whispered against her swollen lips and she gasped and crashed their lips together again. His whole body was on fire and he was finally happy again. He'd thought he'd never experience happiness again. They were both alive and together.

"Steve?" She looked at him with dilated eyes and flushed cheeks. He knew what she was asking. He wanted her too. He wanted all of her. He lifted her up and walked through the hallway to his bedroom.

They barely talked, only soft cries and moans of each others names while they gave into each other. They spent hours in his bed exploring their bodies, touching and kissing each other. It almost felt like they tried to catch up on seventy years.

They were on their sides facing each other and Natasha was tracing invisible lines on his face. "I was waiting for you." She whispered into the darkness of his bedroom. "I came to the bar every day for a whole week. I think I knew that something had happened to you but I didn't want to believe it." She closed her eyes. "I had no idea that _you_ were Captain America who sacrificed his life. I did some digging and when I realized that you were him and that you were dead..." Her voice trembled and he pulled her against him.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He mumbled against her cheek. "If I had another choice..."

"I know you did what you had to do. I was so heartbroken. I'd already pictured our life in Brooklyn together. It was silly. I mean I'd just met you but I never wanted anything that much before. I just wanted to be with the sweet boy from the bar. I was so devastated and angry at the world for taking you away from me that I went back to them."

"Back to whom?"

"The Red Room. I was a free agent when I met you and could do whatever I wanted in my free time. I was content with my life but then I met you and I wanted a different life. With you." She brushed her lips against his. "But they found out about me wanting to defect and wiped my memories again and again. Planted new, fake ones into my brain to make me comply. But I never forgot your warm eyes and sweet smile." She smiled sadly. "They couldn't take that away from me."

"Red Room?" He asked because he still pretty much understood nothing.

"The Russians took young girls from families or orphanages to turn them into spies and assassins. We were raised to be the perfect killers." Natasha moved away from him. "There was still hope for me when I met you, but when I returned to them because I didn't know where else to go... They took everything that was still good in me and turned me into a monster. And I just let them."

"No, I don't believe that. You're not a monster." He cupped her cheek and she closed briefly her eyes. He'd seen bad people and Natasha wasn't one of them. She was good, he'd seen how worried she'd been about Barton and how she hadn't hesitated to fight the Chitauri.

"I brought you my file so you can make your own opinion about me." She sat up and pulled the sheet up to cover her chest. "I think you'll hate me after you read about everything I've done. I have so much blood on my hands." She buried her face in her hands. "God, I shouldn't have slept with you. I'm sorry."

"No, don't do that. I wanted it too and I haven't felt this alive and good since I woke up. I've been so miserable thinking that I missed my chance with you. Don't take this away from me."

"I should go now." She stood up and looked around his bedroom for her clothes. "My phone number is in my file. You can call me if you still want to after you found out what I really am." She got into her clothes. He didn't want her to go but he figured that she needed space. "I've never felt like this about anyone else in the last seventy years, Steve. I want you to know that." She smiled but it didn't reach her eyes and left his apartment. He waited a few seconds and then got out of bed to read her file. He already knew that whatever was in there wouldn't change a thing. He was in love with her, he'd loved her since the first moment he'd seen her. Nothing would ever change that.

* * *

He spent the rest of the night and the whole day reading her file. He cried for her and he had to throw up a few times because of the things they'd done to her. They had abused her, tortured her and wiped her memories again and again to turn her into the perfect killer. It wasn't easy to read about what she had done for the Red Room and the KGB. The list of her confirmed kills was very long and he wondered how many were uncounted for. But it didn't change a thing for him. She'd had no free will, even when she'd met him she had already been under the clutches of the Russians. She'd never had a chance, they had taken that away from her. She had been their victim for almost 80 years until Barton had decided to give her a chance. Steve hated himself for not being able to come to that bar and run away with her. Her life could have been different. They could have been happy and Natasha wouldn't have had to go through hell.

He didn't hate her, he couldn't. He still loved her, knowing her past didn't change that. He thought he might even loved her more now knowing that she'd managed to break free and was now helping people.

He went through the papers until he found the note with her number on it. He grabbed his phone and dialed her number. He was glad that SHIELD had gotten him a phone with buttons and not one with a touch screen.

She answered after a few rings. "Yes?"

"It's me, Steve."

"Hi." She said slowly, she almost sounded like she couldn't believe that he actually called.

"I'm so sorry for everything, Natalia. _Natasha_. I'm so sorry I wasn't there to run away with you. I'm sorry I failed you."

"Oh, Steve. You did nothing wrong. You saved the world! And I did _everything_ wrong. I shouldn't have gone back to them. I should have run away on my own. But I was...I was so scared and I missed you so much. When I found out that you were dead...That was the first and only time I ever cried. My heart was broken."

He pressed his lips together to swallow a sob. "I don't hate you, Nat. I never could. You did the right thing when you were offered a chance. That's all that matters."

"I'm still working on redeeming myself. I still have red in my ledger." Just the fact that she said that, proved that she was a good person. "I'm enhanced. I got injected with a Red Room serum." She suddenly said. "Not on your level, but it's the reason I still look young. Not a lot of people know my real age."

"I won't tell a soul." He promised. Did that mean that he wouldn't age as well? Did they maybe have decades and decades of time together?

"I never told anyone about you. The Red Room never knew about you. They just knew that I tried to run away. They didn't know why. Not even Clint knows. I didn't want to share you with anyone." She whispered. "What we had that night...that dream of a life together...it was too private and precious to tell anyone else about it."

He blinked his tears away. Did she love him too? Even after all this years? "I told Bucky about our plan." He blurted out. "Not everything, just that we wanted to see each other after the war."

"I'm sorry about your friend. I read about him when I read about you."

"Thank you. I think you two would have gotten along very well." Thinking about Bucky was still so painful but he knew that Buck would want him to live his life. "Were you and Clint...are you...were you..." He stuttered out. He didn't really want to know but he had to. He didn't think that they were currently together or Natasha wouldn't have slept with him.

"No, never. It was never like that between us. I...I haven't really been with anyone since you...Not out of my free will." She said slowly and she sounded so ashamed. He almost broke the kitchen table out of rage. He hated it that she had been forced to...use her body for the Red Room. "I never met someone who could hold a candle to you. I...I thought about you every day. No other man had looked at me the way you looked at me when we were making lo- when we were intimate. I understand if you're disgusted that I...I had to sleep with so many people."

"No, no! I'm not! You could never disgust me! I'm just so furious that you had to do that. That you had no saying over your own body."

"I was worried that you might think that I'm a whore."

"I would never call you that. Or any woman for that matter." He said immediately.

"There's something else...I can't get pregnant. I can never give you children, Steve." She said slowly.

"I don't care. I only want you. I don't need children to be happy." He really didn't. He never really thought about being a father. Before the serum he'd been scared his offspring would inherit his many sicknesses and then after the serum...he hadn't really thought about it. And Natasha was all he wanted in his life. "You're everything I could possible want and need."

"You're a good man. Not many think like that. So...you want me in your life?" She asked so quietly that he almost didn't hear her over the phone.

"Of course. You're the _only one_ I want in my life. The only one I trust. I can't even tell you how happy I am that you're still alive. I-" He almost told her that he loved her but he didn't want to tell her over the phone.

"Can we just be friends for now?" She asked. "I think we should take everything slowly. You're still adjusting to a very unique situation. And I want to help you find your way in this world."

His heart sank for a moment because he'd wanted to ask her out to dinner. He almost wanted to run away with her now. To leave this new and crazy world behind them and just be together. But she was probably right and he could use a friend. "Yes. Friends sounds good."

Natasha chuckled lightly. "Don't be too disappointed. I don't wanna be_ just_ friends for the rest of our lives, Steve Rogers. I spent 70 years pining after you."

* * *

Natasha helped him adapt to this new world in the next weeks. She taught him how to use a computer and smart phone, wasn't annoyed when he didn't understand something immediately and didn't mind helping him catch up on history. She considered herself an expect since she'd lived through everything and could tell him things that hadn't made it into the history books. She went shopping with him to get him a modern wardrobe and chose a new haircut for him. She came with him to his meetings at SHIELD. She helped him track down Bucky's sister and visited with him her daughter. Jamie thought Natasha was his girlfriend and she didn't correct her. She watched countless movies with him and made him watch her favorite shows. They went to Coney Island together and she blushed furiously when he won a teddy bear for her. He was so smitten with her in that moment that he almost told her that he loved her.

And he noticed that she was different around him. She was distant and cold at SHIELD, and her and Stark were constantly barking at each other when they were in the same room. She acted at SHIELD like Coulson's death didn't bother her but she'd admitted to him that Coulson had been like a father to her and his death had hit her pretty hard.

She was goofy and made terrible jokes when they were alone. She smiled and laughed a lot around him and he always felt like the luckiest guy in the world when he was the reason for her smile. She pecked his lips every time he did _something adorable_ in her words and he wanted to kiss her more but he respected her wish to just be friends for now. She had a point. He didn't want her to think that he just wanted her because she was the last part of his old world.

She wore black pants and leather jackets at SHIELD and pretty sundresses and sneakers when she was with him. She demanded that everyone call her Romanoff at work, but she smiled warmly when he called her Nat when they were alone. She told him that her favorite genre were musicals and she always sang along when they watched one. She taught him how to dance and kissed him while they were slow dancing to Elvis Presley. She spent the night with him that day.

They were intimate another two times despite being _just friends. _The first time was when he'd woken up from a terrible nightmare and called her to just hear her voice. She showed up at his door half an hour later and kissed him as soon as he opened the door whispering again and again that he wasn't alone. They made love (there was no other word for it) on his living room floor and then slept there with her head on his chest. The second time was when she came from visiting Barton and she didn't say anything but it must have been bad. They laid down on his bed for a nap and made love when they woke up. They didn't talk about the fact that they had sex twice despite just being friends but he could see that it meant as much to her as to him.

She slept with him again on his birthday after she invited him to dinner and went to an art gallery with him. Maybe they should talk about making things official between them, but to him they were a couple and the fact that she made him breakfast the next morning (pancakes shaped into hearts) and kissed him goodbye made him think that she felt the same about them.

He'd never been to her place. He had no idea where she lived. They always spent time in his apartment. They just left the cinema after a special afternoon screening of Disney classics when it started to rain cats and dogs. The sky was almost black and he already heard the thunder.

"Let's wait at my place until the storm is over." Natasha yelled and he followed her into the cab she'd hailed.

They walked into an old apartment building. "I don't have guests over. Like ever." She said with an excusing smile before she unlocked her door.

Her apartment was small and had only basic furniture but there was a whole wall covered in books. She didn't have a couch just a bed at the opposite wall of the books. His gaze stopped at the framed photo next to her bed. It was _him. _Before he'd gotten the serum, it showed him with his dog tags and he still remembered the day at the base when the picture was taken of him. The fact that she'd framed a photo of his old self and not one of him after the serum warmed his heart.

"Oh." Natasha ran over to her bed and hid the frame underneath her pillow. Her whole face was red. Why was she embarrassed?! "I forgot that was there."

"How do...Why do you have that?"

"Um..." Her face somehow even got redder. She was nothing like the Natasha roaming the hallways at SHIELD. "Uh,I...I broke into the SRR base when I had my first mission in New York...I wanted to see if they had anything about you and your photo fell out of your file and I just took it...Uh, do you want it back?!"

"No. I...I feel very flattered that you kept it all these years." He said softly and he just wanted grab her face and kiss her. His mother had always said to him that he would know when he'd found the one and he knew in that moment.

Natasha's face slowly returned to its original color. "I should probably tell you that I also still have your drawing since you already know about the photo."

He stepped closer to her. "Natasha-"

"I love you. I've loved you for so long." She blurted out and her eyes widened. "Oh God!" She gasped. "Please forget what I just said."

"I can't." He cupped her face. "I can't, because I love you. I love you since the first moment I saw you."

Natasha smiled softly and closed her eyes. "How lucky are we that we get a second chance?"

"So damn lucky, sweetheart." He whispered and she blushed. He wondered if anyone had ever called her an endearment or even told her that they loved her. "I love you."

"I love you." She repeated fiercely and kissed him pulling him with her onto her bed.

* * *

He heard his front door open while he was staring at the files Fury had dropped off earlier today. He'd offered him a job in DC and given him a range of agents he could pick from to be his partner. There was only one agent he wanted as his partner but he didn't know if she wanted the same.

"Honey, I'm home!" Natasha singsonged and came into the living room. "I got everything for chicken tikki masala." They had been cooking recipes from all over the world preferring to stay at home where no one was bothering them and it was just the two of them. She walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "Hi." She whispered and kissed his neck. He turned his head so she could kiss him.

"Hi, sweetheart."

She smiled and kissed him again. "What's this?" She nodded at the files on the coffee table.

"Fury came over. He offered me an official job at SHIELD. In DC. These are the files of potential partners."

"Am I on the list?" She asked.

"No."

"Oh." She looked hurt.

"But I want to go to Fury and demand you as my partner."

"Yeah?"

"Of course. There is no one else I trust more to have my back." He told her truthfully and her whole face lit up. He already realized that a lot of SHIELD agents didn't trust Natasha which pissed him off. Hadn't she proven herself by now?

"I want to be your partner in every part of your life." She admitted with pink cheeks. He nodded and wanted to pull her onto the couch but she shook her head. "I have to put the groceries for our dinner away."

He pouted playfully and she grinned pecking his lips and then disappearing into his small kitchen. He followed her. "The job is in DC."

"I figured. Are you okay with moving to DC?"

She put the meat into the fridge and turned around. "Are you? You love Brooklyn!"

"I do, but I also don't mind living somewhere else. SHIELD is gonna provide an apartment."

"Don't take it." She said immediately.

"What? Why?"

"I wouldn't put it past Fury to bug it. He'll probably have an undercover agent live in your building." She looked at her feet. "We could...we could look for a place together?"

"Really?" He was definitely grinning like an idiot and Natasha ran to him to peck his lips. Looked he did something adorable again.

"Maybe we can even get a house?" She asked shyly. "I've never lived in one. I always pictured us to live in a house when I was dreaming about our future."

"I never lived in a house either." He cupped her face. "I want to live with you."

She smiled brightly and kissed him. "You make me so happy." He brushed his thumbs over her cheekbones. "I told Clint that you're my boyfriend. I didn't tell him everything. He doesn't know how long we know each other. But he noticed that I was different, happier and I told him the reason."

He knew that was a big step for her. Maybe even bigger than moving in together. "I love you, Natalia." She smiled and buried her face in his chest.

* * *

_2013_

Natasha taught him new fighting skills and prepped him on everything SHIELD related. She helped him pick members for his team and he was surprised that Barton wouldn't come back to work in the field. He'd wanted him on his team for Natasha. And he really liked to get to know the man who'd turned around Natasha's life. She'd only told him that Barton had left New York, he could tell there was more to it but he knew that she would have told him more if she could.

They found a nice and beautiful house for rent in Georgetown and signed the lease together. Natasha gave SHIELD two PO addresses because she wanted their address to be confidential. He trusted her to do what was smart and would keep them (mostly her) safe.

They both agreed to keep their relationship a secret around SHIELD. He didn't want anyone to know about his private life and he didn't want people to reduce Natasha to his girlfriend. He'd expected that to change but women still weren't regarded as equals.

He was sitting in his new office at the Triskelion going over files of potential threats in the Middle East. He hadn't been in the field since New York and he was kind of enjoying it. It had given him and Natasha the time to get to know each other and to strengthen their relationship. Natasha had already left to go home to let the new couch and their dinning room table in. As it turned out, Natasha loved to decorate and furnish their house and it took him some time to realize that this was the first time that Natasha had a real_ home. _At home she was his sweet and dorky Natasha and at SHIELD she was the Black Widow. It had been weird at the beginning but he understood why she acted this way. And he felt honored that she let him see the real Natasha.

He shut his laptop and decided to call it a day. He put his shield on his back and left his office. He waited for the elevator and Fury came into his view when the door opened.

"Rogers."

"Sir." He greeted the director and stepped into the elevator.

"Going home?"

"Yes, sir."

Fury nodded. "You know you never explained to me why you picked Romanoff as your partner."

"She proved herself to be a formidable agent during the Chitauri invasion. I trust her." _And I love and trust her more than anything in the world_

Fury chuckled. "I think Coulson and Barton are the only ones who ever said these three words about her."

"You don't trust her?!"

"The last time I trusted someone, I lost an eye." Fury chuckled darkly. "Romanoff is good at her job but I wouldn't let her watch my dog."

"You have a dog?"

"No." The elevator reached the garage and he was glad to get away from Fury. "Listen Rogers, I don't know what's going on between you and Romanoff, and I don't really want to but be careful. She eats boy scouts like you alive."

He really wanted to tell Fury to go fuck himself in that moment. "I'm not a boy scout. And you don't have to worry about me."

Fury almost looked...sad. "It's not you I'm worried about."

Steve had no idea what that meant but he did wonder if Fury knew that he and Natasha were more than just partners. He decided not to tell Natasha about this weird conversation when he got home.

The smell of vanilla and cinnamon greeted him when he opened the front door. He dropped his keys into the bowl in the hallway and hung his shield up before he made his way into the kitchen.

Natasha was just taking a baking sheet full of cookies out of the oven. She'd taken a liking to baking since they'd moved into their house and she was really good at it. She put the baking sheet on the kitchen counter and smiled. "Hi, soldier." She smiled and slapped his hand when he tried to steal a cookie. "You have to wait until they're cooled down."

He pouted but she kissed the pout off his lips. "Hi, sweetheart."

Her hands slipped underneath his shirt. "Since you have to wait until the cookies are cooled down...You could use that time to make love to me on our new couch." She whispered and looked up at him through her lashes. Who was he to turn down such a great idea!

* * *

Fury had sent Natasha on a solo mission and Steve was anxiously waiting for her return. She had let him know through a secure line that only the two of them knew about that she was would be home soon. He just didn't understand why Fury had sent her alone. He and Natasha had been doing every mission together since they became partners. And it amazed him every time how _good_ she was at her job. She truly was the best and he couldn't have wished for a better partner. He trusted her with his life and heart.

He heard how the front door got opened and closed and how Natasha typed in the code (the date of the night they met) into their alarm system. He gave her a few minutes to really arrive before he would greet her.

She was getting out of her knee high leather boots when he walked into the hallway. Her leather jacket and holster were already hanging on the wardrobe.

"Hey."

She looked up and her face was...She looked defeated but she tried to hide it. "What's wrong? Are you hurt? What happened?"

She ran towards him and threw herself into his arms, almost knocking him over and kissed him with an urgency that took his breath away. "I love you. I love you." She whispered between kisses. "I love you."

"What happened?" He managed to get out when she pulled away to get air into her lungs.

"You know I can't tell you."

"You think I'll tell Fury you shared confidential intel?" He laughed a little. "Something is obviously wrong and I need you to tell me so I can help you, sweetheart."

"Is Captain America breaking the rules?"

"For your benefit? Always."

She smiled a little and rested her head on his chest for a moment. "I killed someone yesterday. Someone like me."

"Another widow?"

"Yeah. I actually helped train her." She looked to the ground. "I helped turn her into a ruthless killer."

"Nat-"

She shook her head. "Fury sent me to finish her. I offered her the same chance Clint gave me but she refused. We fought and I killed her. That could have been me, Steve. It would have been me if it weren't for you. Clint would have killed me if I hadn't accepted his offer. And I only did it because I knew that you would want me to. The sweet boy with the beautiful blue eyes would want me to turn my life around. I owe you everything."

"No, you don't. You did that all by yourself." He kissed her because she looked like she wanted to object. "You're good. You always have been."

"I love you, Steve. Even when I wasn't capable of love, even when they took that ability away from me...I still loved you. You were always with me."

He hugged her tightly and she buried her face in the crook of his neck. "And I will always be with you. I'm never leaving you again."

"Good." She breathed and pressed kisses onto his neck. "I don't think I could survive losing you a second time."

* * *

He had been furious with Fury but he couldn't tell him of course that he knew that Natasha had killed another Widow. No, he had to bite his tongue and keep working for SHIELD. He liked the work they did and he realized that he couldn't just do a normal job. He needed to go out there and _do_ something. And he knew he was a lucky guy that he could do his job with his girl by his side. They worked well together, they completed each other on the job. And he trusted her judgement when she thought that a situation had to be handled a certain way. She followed his orders without question but he always listened to her suggestions. Some members of his team seemed to be bothered by that but shut up when he shot them a glare. Natasha didn't care about what anyone thought about her and she told him more than ones that she wasn't looking for any friends at SHIELD. Not that he was. He got along with Hill and he trusted the men and women on his team to do their job right but he didn't need to spend his free time with them. He was in contact with Stark but it still kind of freaked him out that he was Howard's son.

"Ugh!" Natasha groaned behind him while she got into her running shoes. "Why do we have to go running?!" She was sashaying over to him. He really liked her in tight yoga pants. "There are so much better ways to burn calories." She ran her finger over his chest.

He grabbed her hand gently and kissed her finger tip. "You don't have to come with me. Stay in bed, I'll join you after my run for some calories burning." He said with a wink.

She laughed. "That was terrible. No, the running is good for my cardio and I like how your ass bounces when you run in front of me."

He shook his head in amusement. "Is that why you're pretending you're not as fast as me?"

"I'm fast but not _that _fast." She pecked his lips. "Now be nice and I'll let you wash my back under the shower when we're back."

They ran their usual route and passed by that one jogger they saw regularly on their morning runs.

"On your left."

"Uh huh."

He heard Natasha a few moments later. "On your right."

"I hate you both so much!" The man yelled and he heard Natasha snickering.

The shower they took after their run was quite long because Natasha let him wash some other parts of her body besides her back. She was laughing and giggling underneath the steam of the hot water and it was his favorite sound in the world.

He watched her get ready for work and Natasha turned around with a raised eyebrow and pointed at her breasts that were now covered by a bra. "Did you seriously leave a hickey on my left breast?!"

"Yup." He grinned proudly. "I'll intend to leave one on your right one tonight."

Natasha rolled her eyes and slid into her business dress. They would spend most of the day at the Pentagon. "Zip me up?" She turned around and lifted her hair off her neck.

He stood up from the end of the bed and pressed a kiss between her shoulder blades and then on her neck while zipping her dress up. "You look amazing."

"You're such a dork." She said with a warm smile. She crinkled her nose. "But you're my dork."

"Always." He promised and he wondered if he should tell her that he had checked what kind of engagement rings he could afford.

They had countless meetings at the Pentagon accompanied by Hill and Sitwell and he had to grit his teeth every time someone made a stupid comment about Natasha's past and her ties to Russia. Natasha's face showed no emotions but he did wonder if it hurt her deep down. He wanted to put General Talbot through a wall after he made an ugly remark about her but it would have probably made everything worse. But he was so proud of his girl when she corrected him on the current situation on the Ukraine because his intel had been outdated. He had been very embarrassed and Hill barely managed to hide her laugh with a cough.

"Does is bother you?" He asked her when they were back home sitting on their couch and Natasha was sipping on a glass of wine.

"What?"

"How people treat you? They're...they're so disrespectful."

She placed the wine glass back on the coffee table. "It's not like it's coming out of nowhere. I did horrible things, I deserve it." He opened his mouth to object. "I know you disagree, but I don't really care about what other people think about me. Their opinion doesn't matter to me. Only yours does. And Clint's. And Coulson's did. And Fury lets me stay in the States and doesn't send me back to Putin."

"I think the world of you." He really did. She was the most amazing person he'd ever met. She was so strong and smart. And loving and...She was just perfect. It was a horrible thought but he was glad that she hadn't moved on from him. It was the most selfish thing but he didn't think he could have taken it if he gotten her back in his life and she'd loved someone else. She never really talked about what she'd done while he had been in the ice but he knew that she was telling the truth when she said that there hadn't been anyone else.

"And that means the world to me." She whispered softly. "I was so lost without you."

"I thought about you every day during the war. You were always on my mind. Buck was teasing me endlessly." He said with a small smile. "He threatened to tell you every embarrassing thing about me."

"I would have loved to really meet him."

"Yeah, me too." Bucky's death was still...It still hurt like hell but he learned to live with the pain. "He always told me I would find the right girl one day. I didn't even want to go out that night but Buck convinced me. And I'm so glad he did, sweetheart. I'm so fucking glad he did."

Natasha nodded. "We owe him everything." She raised her wine glass. "To James Buchanan Barnes." She took a sip and then handed the glass to him.

"To Bucky. May he be surrounded by pretty dames in heaven." He raised the glass and then took a sip as well.

* * *

_2014_

"Wait, not so fast!" Natasha laughed while he tugged her along by her hand. They were in London for their first official vacation as a couple and he had to get her to a very special destination. "We're not all super soldiers! I wouldn't have worn heeled boots if I'd known you want to run through half London."

"We're almost there, sweetheart." He turned around and gave her a sheepish grin. "You want me to carry you?"

"Don't you dare! I can walk on my own!"'

He laughed and turned with her around the corner. Natasha stopped walking and her grip on his hand tightened. "Is that...?"

"Yeah." He smiled. "I mean the bar is long gone but this is where we met. And fell in love."

Tears were forming in her eyes. "I haven't been in this part of London since...since I was waiting for you." She blinked her tears away. "I can't believe we're here _together_ now."

"I know. When I...before the plane hit the ice, I pictured you waiting here for me and me coming around this corner. Knowing that it would never happen was more painful than the plane crash. And then when I woke up and thought for a few seconds that it was still 1945...I thought hey I can still make it, and when I realized that it wasn't the forties anymore and that I lost my one chance at true love...I was broken, Nat. I've never felt that kind of pain before but then I saw you at the ramp of that quinjet and I...everything was okay."

Natasha smiled beautifully at him. "I would have waited another seventy years for you. When I heard they found you and that you were alive...that was the happiest day of my life."

He cupped her cheek. "Why didn't you come to me sooner?"

"I was terrified that you wouldn't want me anymore once you knew who I really was."

He kissed her softly and he heard her sigh against his lips. "I'll always want you. I'll always love you. And that's why-" He let go off her and dropped down on one knee pulling the ring box out of his jacket. Natasha's eyes widened and she covered her mouth with her hands. "Will you marry me, Natalia? Will you be my wife for the next seventy years and the next seventy years after that?"

"Yes." She breathed and she was about to drop on her knees as well but he didn't want her to be on the dirty sidewalk so he pulled her to sit on his outstretched thigh. "Of course, I'll marry you!"


	3. Chapter 3

Steve had been more than surprised when Natasha had asked him what he thought about a farm wedding. She'd never stroke him as the kind of woman who would want something like that. He'd always thought she'd wanted an elegant wedding. But he'd agreed. of course. He didn't care where they would get married as long as he would be her husband at the end of the day. Marrying Natasha had been on his mind for...well, pretty much since he'd walked out of the door on their first night together. He'd imagined during the war their little wedding with Buck as his best man. He had known that it had been insane to already think about marriage even by 40s standards but he had been so in love with her. He still was. And he _always_ would be.

He had been the last few days in Toronto for a conference and it was the middle of the night when he finally got home. He walked quietly into the house, putting his suitcase next to the wardrobe. He couldn't wait to climb into bed and pull his girl against his chest. He loved the way she snuggled against him and made those cute, little noises in her sleep. He'd just gotten out of his jacket when Natasha came running towards him and he barely managed to catch her when she jumped into his arms because he had been so surprised. She really moved around like a cat.

"I missed you!" She breathed before she pressed her lips against his. And from that moment on it was a tangle of clothes getting thrown around the hallway and him stumbling to the floor careful not to hurt Natasha. She flipped them and he let her have his way with him.

"What was that?" He laughed, still a bit out of breath but feeling really good.

"I told you I missed you!" She grinned and kissed his shoulder. "It's been really lonely without you in bed to keep me warm." She cupped his face with her left hand and he felt her ring against his cheek. "I'll always miss you when you're away."

"I know the feeling." He whispered and kissed her deeply to show her how much he missed her. She smiled against his lips and wasn't opposed to another incredible round of lovemaking in their hallway.

Steve had just taken a shower at the Triskelion after the intense training session he'd had with his team. SHIELD didn't care about the fact that he'd come home late last night (and then stayed up longer to make love to his Natasha) and he had to report back to duty this morning. His team was in top shape and Natasha had done an excellent job at leading the team in his absence. He hadn't had a chance yet to read the report (because he had been busy this morning at home making breakfast for Nat and watching her get ready. He loved to watch her do her make up and hair. It always felt so intimate and domestic) but he did know that a mission in Cleveland had gone smoothly.

"God, I'm glad that Cap is back." He heard Rumlow grunting when he was about to walk around the corner to get back to his office. "I hate it when that bitch is in charge!" Steve balled his hands into his fists. He wanted to strangle Rumlow in that moment. He was a good agent but he always came off as a dick. "Why didn't Cap chose me as his second in command? I'm a fucking Marine and she's just some...some Russian whore!"

That was it! He was going to kill that asshole! "You know that Fury would kill you if he heard you talk about his favorite like that, right?" Rollins hushed. Natasha was Fury's favorite?! "If Romanoff doesn't do the job first!"

"Please I can take her! She's barely five feet tall!"_ She is 5'3, you asshole! _ He thought to himself and he knew that Natasha could take him. She could probably even take Steve out if she really wanted to. "You think Rogers made her his second in command because they're fucking? Why else would he do that? Guess even Captain Perfect is only a horndog like the rest of us."

"She's the only one he knew from before." Rollins said and Steve panicked for a second. Did he _know_? "They fought together in New York. She's an Avenger. Probably thought that it was a good idea."

"She's probably blowing him to stay in that position." Okay, he heard enough. But he felt guilty because Natasha had been in his office once or twice crawling under his desk and unzipping his pants because he had been so tense and she'd wanted him to relax. _That_ was not the reason she was his second in command and he'd returned the favor back at home. He just hated it that people reduced her to _this,_ completely ignoring how good she was at her job._ "_I can't wait until things are different around here. I hope she's on our side and she'll suck my c-" Rumlow didn't come further because Steve stormed around the corner and lifted him up with his hand wrapped around his throat.

"Shut the fuck up! Do not ever talk about her or any other woman like that again, you piece of shit! Your behavior is disgusting and disrespectful!" He snarled and couldn't help but choke Rumlow a little bit. "You're off the team and I'll make sure that Fury knows about this." He dropped Rumlow to the ground. "If I ever see your face again, I'll will put you through a wall! Understood?"

"Yes, sir." Rumlow choked out and he looked seriously afraid. _Good_. He immediately went to Fury's office to tell him about the incident and Fury assured him that he would deal with Rumlow. Hill came into his office at afternoon to give him files of potential candidates as the new team member. He decided to go with Agent Morse who was apparently an acquaintance of Nat and both women seemed content with the fact that they would be working together. Morse respected Natasha and Steve was happy when he heard that Fury had fired Rumlow. Was Natasha really his favorite?

* * *

"Do you have any wishes for my wedding dress?" Natasha asked him while they were waiting for Sam Wilson to arrive at the cafe. They had been talking to him after their morning runs and after Nat's background check they'd decided to get to know him. She thought that it would be a good thing for him to have a friend outside of their world and it didn't hurt that Sam was a veteran as well.

"Um, should I?" He asked confused. "It's your dress."

She smiled. "Yeah, but I want you to like it."

"Sweetheart, I'll love any dress on you. You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." He said with a dopey grin. Natasha blushed a little and leaned forward to peck his lips. He really liked her habit to reward him with kisses when he did something she thought was adorable.

"Should I come back later?" Wilson quipped and grinned broadly when they both pulled apart to look at him. Steve had been over the moon when Natasha agreed to let Sam know that they were an item. Not that he wanted to parade the fact that he was with her but he did feel a little bit proud that someone knew that this amazing woman was his girl. And soon she would be his _wife_.

"Hi, Wilson." Nat greeted him. "We're glad you could make it."

Sam smiled widely. "Hey, I'm just thrilled that you two decided that I'm cool enough to hang with you."

Steve chuckled. "Well, you passed Natasha background check."

Sam laughed. "I feel like I don't want to know what would have happend if I didn't."

Natasha grinned like a Cheshire cat. "You really don't."

Sam was a great guy and the three of them got along really well and he didn't miss how happy Sam looked when Steve promised to drop by the VA some time.

"I think Wilson has a crush on you." Natasha purred while he got her out of her pants. She was popped up on her elbows laying on their bed and looking at him with a grin. "He looked like you hung the moon or something. I get it. You're pretty awesome."

"Yeah?" He whispered against her thigh before he pressed a kiss on her smooth skin. "I think you're pretty awesome too. The awesomest."

"I don't think that's a word." She laughed breathlessly while he moved his lips up until he was between her legs to press a kiss on her most intimate part. "_Oh. _Yeah, you're the awesomest at this." She moaned and let him peel off her panties.

They spent more time with Sam and he knew that Nat considered him a friend as well. It was nice that someone knew about them. It felt good that Sam asked him how his girl was doing when he and Sam did something without Nat. He knew that Barton knew about them but he hadn't seen him since New York and Nat only said that he was doing good when he asked her about him. Stark seemed to sense that something was going on between him and Nat the few times they saw him, but besides weird comments he never directly asked them if they were an item. He had the suspicion that Stark was a bit afraid of Nat and she and Pepper Potts were in contact.

He'd had few beers with Sam at a sports bar watching a Dodgers game. He still couldn't fucking believe that they moved to fucking _LA_. He'd wanted to invite Nat to a game when they still had been living in New York and he had been flabbergasted when she'd told him they'd moved. He'd stopped on his way home by the supermarket to get Nat her favorite chocolate. He looked for her but she wasn't downstairs.

"Nat?"

"Bedroom!" She responded and he jogged up the stairs already looking forward to the kiss he would get when she saw the chocolate. The bedroom door was open and he dropped the box of chocolate when he looked into the room.

Natasha was laying on their bed in only a Dodgers Jersey. She left a few buttons open and he could see a little bit of her breasts. "Hi, soldier."

"Uh..." He managed to get out. "Um..."

Natasha laughed, clearly pleased with herself and beckoned him to join her. He hastily got out of his clothes and jumped onto the bed. He had no idea what was going on with him but he kissed and touched her anywhere he could and rolled with her around the bed until they suddenly fell down. He barely managed to roll them so she would land on him and not the floor.

Natasha was laughing and pulling herself up so she was sitting on his lap. "I should wear this more often. Good to know that Captain America wants me so much that his reflexes basically don't work anymore."

"Nat." He whined and unbutton the rest of her jersey. "You look so good. So...hot." He said with a blush. God, he sounded like some horny teenager.

Natasha grinned happily and grabbed a pillow from the bed and shoved it under his head. "You want me to leave it on? So you'll think about me every time there's a game?"

He knew he was blushing furiously but he nodded. "Yeah. But I'll always think about you, sweetheart."

Now Natasha was blushing. "You're such a dork." She whispered and leaned down to kiss him deeply. She chuckled into the kiss when his hands moved to her beautiful and round behind.

* * *

Natasha wanted him to see the farm before they would get married there. They still hadn't set a date and both hoped to find time where they could leave for a short honeymoon after the wedding. They couldn't be gone too long with their important jobs at SHIELD, but he hoped a few days somewhere warm would be possible for them. He still didn't know how Natasha wanted to accomplish that since she didn't want Fury or SHIELD to know about them.

"How did you even find this farm, sweetheart?" He asked her while she drove their rental car through a forest. "You don't come across as a farm girl."

"Oh, I'm not." She smirked when she looked briefly over to him. "You'll understand in a bit, darling."

He had no idea what that was supposed to mean. Natasha drove by corn fields and stopped the car in front of a nice farm house. It looked old but it still seemed inviting and cozy. They both got out of the car and Natasha knocked on the front door.

The door got opened by a pregnant brunette who smiled warmly at them. "Hi!" She hugged Natasha and then him. Who was this woman to Nat? "It's so nice to finally meet you, Steve. I'm Laura. Nat has told us so much about you!""

"Hi?" He was still confused and even more confused when Barton showed up behind this Laura. "Huh?"

Barton laughed. "I see that Nat has kept you in the dark. This is my farm. And this is my wife Laura. Good to see you again."

He blinked a few times. Barton was married? He had farm? And he was about to become a father. Natasha spoke up. "I wanted to tell you, but it wasn't my secret to share."

"Fury helped me set this up when I joined SHIELD. He, Coulson and Nat are the only ones who know. Or knew, in Coulson's case."

"Auntie Nat!" A little girl screamed and threw herself into Natasha's arms. "You're here! I missed you!" Nat picked the little girl up and kissed her cheek.

"Hi, Lila. This is Steve. The man I'm going to marry." Natasha said and Lila looked at him with big eyes. He waved shyly at her. He had no experience with children expect Bucky's little sister.

"He looks like Prince Charming!" She whispered and Barton rolled his eyes. A boy, maybe eight or nine, joined them and gave Natasha a hug. He introduced himself as Cooper and asked shyly if he really was Captain America.

They were shown their room and Natasha changed into more comfortable clothes. "I'm sorry it took so long for you to meet them."

"It's okay. I'm happy you have them in your life. And I get why you want to get married here and I love the idea."

"Yeah?" She smiled and sat down on his lap. "They were the closet thing to a family to me until you came back into my life." She pressed kisses onto his jawline. "And now they're your family too."

He wrapped his arms around her waist. "They seem great."

Nat nodded. "They are. Laura is very smitten with you. I think I talked too much about you." She chuckled. "She wants you to help Clint pick a birthday present for her. She loves the engagement ring you gave me." She ran her fingers through his hair and gave him a heated kiss that made him ache for more. "And I think Lila's in love with you." She kissed him again, her tongue exploring his mouth. Would it be terribly rude to skip dinner and just stay in their room? "Gotta keep you interested in me." She whispered against his mouth.

"There's only one girl for me. I've been in love with her for seventy years." He whispered and pulled her into a deep kiss. They made out until Clint knocked on the door yelling that he didn't want to get scarred for life.

* * *

"I bought a tattoo gun." Natasha announced after she came home and joined him on the couch. "I want a tattoo."

"Okay?" He answered and turned the TV off to focus on her completely.

"And I want you to tattoo me." She said and his jaw dropped. What? "I want you to design the tattoo and then tattoo it on my skin. Somewhere on my body that only we'll ever see."

"I have no...Nat, I can't tattoo you! I've never done anything like this before!" What if he hurt her? What-

"I trust you. I know that you can do it." She stood up from the couch and unbuttoned her jeans and pulled them down a bit. "I want it to be here." She tapped on her left pelvic bone underneath her scar. "Only you will see it. And you're the only one who is allowed to touch me there."

"Nat-" He started but a look into her eyes stopped him. She trusted him and she wanted this. And who was he to turn her down. He would always give her what she wanted. "Okay."

Natasha beamed. "Really?"

"I'll do it. I don't really want some tattoo guy get his hands on you." He answered truthfully. The spot she had chosen for her tattoo was pretty intimate. "You already know the motive."

Now she was blushing. "Delphiniums." Okay, there were pretty flowers but he didn't understand why she'd want them on her skin forever. "They're the birth flowers for July."

_Oh. _"Natasha-" He breathed out, incredibly touched. He was almost mad that a tattoo wouldn't last on his skin. He wanted to say more but she was already kissing him breathless.

"So something of you is always with me." She whispered between kisses and helped him out of his shirt because the mood had changed completely and they both needed each other.

He spent the next days obsessing over the tattoo design and read everything he could find about tattoos and what he had to keep in mind. Natasha somehow managed to steal some artificial skin from the med bay so he could practice. He would normally never encourage such behavior but he didn't want to mess up Nat's tattoo.

He did her tattoo on a Sunday evening and he did a really good job if he did say so himself. Natasha loved it as she told him repeatedly and kissed him deeply. And it surprised him _how much_ he liked the fact that something of him was on her skin forever.

* * *

Natasha sent him a text with an address on his birthday telling him to meet her there. He ended up in front of a dancing studio, he couldn't look inside since the blinds were closed but the door was open when he checked. He walked inside and his breath stopped.

The studio was lit by hundreds and hundreds of fairy lights and in the middle of the room was Natasha in a leotard and tights. She smiled softly. "Happy birthday, honey."

"I...Thank you. What...Um..." He stuttered out. He couldn't believe she did this for him.

"I realized that you've never seen me dance before. And I thought that you...that you maybe want to see that?" She asked carefully and he nodded eagerly. Natasha looked relieved. "Oh, good. I'm a bit out of practice so don't expect too much! And afterwards we're gonna have a picnic here to celebrate the birthday of the love of my life." She walked over to him and cupped his face. "I love you."

"I love you." He smiled and kissed her again. Natasha told him to sit down and she started the music. Seeing Natasha dance was...there were no words for it. She was so beautiful, in fact he didn't think he'd ever seen something more beautiful. She had a calm and serene look on her face and moved like magic. She twirled and jumped and she was grace and beauty personified. He couldn't believe that she shared this with him. The music stopped and she bowed.

"Wow." He breathed out. "Wow. You...That was incredible. Thank you."

Natasha smiled happily and walked over to him and straddled his lap. "I...I haven't danced in forever. I tried it in the fifties but I had to think about you and how you told me that I could be a ballerina and I...it just hurt too much."

He took a deep breath. Knowing that she had lived for seventy years thinking that he had been dead...He didn't think he could have lived with that pain if the roles had been reversed. His Natasha was so strong. "I love you more than anything."

Natasha rested her forehead against his. "I could only ever love you." She kissed him softly. "The only one I ever wanna dance for and with is you, my darling."

"My heart, my life, my soul." He breathed against her neck, overwhelmed with his intense love for her. He'd never thought he could love _that_ much before he'd met her. She was more important than anything. If she'd asked him to hang up his shield to live a normal life, he would do it in a heartbeat. "You're my everything, Nat. Always and forever."

She gently grabbed his hair to pull his head up. She kissed him until they were both out of breath. She pressed her small hand over his heart. "Mine." She whispered and he was sure that she could feel how his heart was fluttering. "Let's get married next weekend. I can't wait anymore. I want to be your wife. I waited seventy years for this."

"Yes." He wrapped his arms around her to press her against him. "Let's make an honest man out of me." Natasha laughed and stood up to shimmy out of her leotard and tights. He pressed his thumb into her tattoo looking up to her. God, she was so beautiful and perfect. And she was _his_.

* * *

He blinked a few times before he could finally open his eyes. God, his whole body hurt. What had happened? He looked around and found Nat sitting on a chair next to the bed he was laying in. She was curled into the chair sleeping. She looked like an angel but he had still problems to remember what happend. Why was he in a hospital bed? His chest hurt like he had been shot. Natasha moved in her sleep and her sweater fell off her shoulder and he saw that she was wearing a bandage.

What-

_Oh, God_! His heart started racing and the monitor started beeping. Fury'd died. SHIELD had been compromised. They'd tried to kill them. Natasha had been shot. By...By Bucky. Bucky wasn't dead. He was the Winter Soldier and working for Hydra against his will. Hydra was back and SHIELD gone. Bucky had put Steve into a hospital bed. Bucky was out there and probably confused and scared, not really knowing who he was. _Oh God_!

Nat woke up and was immediately by his side. "Shh, it's okay. Just breathe, sweetie. Just breathe. Listen to my voice. Just breathe in and out."

He managed to calm down, thanks to her. "I'm sorry we missed our wedding." They had been about to leave for Clint's farm when Fury had ordered them to come back for a mission. And then everything had gone to hell.

Natasha kissed him very softly. "That's okay. How are you feeling?"

"Peachy keen." He said and she raised an eyebrow. "Everything hurts, but it's doable. Where are we?"

"Stark- Avengers Tower." Nat answered. They were in Manhattan? "I didn't want to risk Hydra trying to finish you, so I had Stark get you after your surgery. His quinjet is equipped for medical transportation, thank God!"

"Bucky?"

"Gone. I think he pulled you out of the river and then ran. I don't think Hydra has him."

"I'm sorry he shot you -again." He still couldn't really wrap his mind around the fact that Buck was still alive and what had happened to him. He couldn't even image what he had been through.

"That's not your fault. It's not even his." Natasha laced their fingers together.

"I have to...I have to go after him, Nat." He said quietly. "I have...He's my best friend."

She nodded with a sad smile. "I know, Steve. I'll already arranged for our stuff to be put into storage and recalled our lease." She caught his puzzled look. "I'm coming with you." He opened his mouth to protest but she put her hand over his mouth. "No! Don't even try, Rogers! I'm coming with you. You think I'll let you chase after Barnes alone? He's your friend but he's also confused and dangerous. I'm coming with you to protect you."

She removed her hand. "I can't ask you to do that."

"Good thing then that you don't have to. I owe Barnes. You said that he convinced you to go out that night. Without him, we wouldn't have met. I'm helping you save him. End of story."

"Thank you." He mumbled quietly. He didn't know if he could even do it without Nat. And just the thought of being separated from her was just _unbearable_.

"I have one condition though."

"What?"

"I wanna get married before we leave." She smiled softly. "My dress is here and I have a tux for you. And I know a trustworthy judge to marry us. We can get married tonight."

"Huh?"

"You want to get married tonight? Start the search for your friend as husband and wife?"

God, what he had done to deserve her. "Yes, Of course I'll marry you tonight. But I...what about the Bartons?"

"We'll have a party at their farm once our lives are back to normal. I don't care where we get married or who's there -I just wanna marry you."

Pepper was truly magical and turned the penthouse of the Tower into a wedding location with hundreds of flowers and candles. She and Tony offered to be the witnesses with Tony constantly remarking while he helped him get ready for the ceremony that he'd known all along that he and _Red _were a thing.

His eyes almost fell out of their sockets when he saw who was going to marry them. Next to Pepper standing was _Ruth Bader Ginsburg_. How on earth did Nat know her? She nodded at him and the music was already playing.

Jarvis opened the doors and Natasha came into view. She was wearing a beautiful ivory silk dress that was inspired by the forties. She looked...there were no words. She was truly a vision.

"Hi." She whispered and was smiling from ear to ear.

"Hi." He echoed and took her hand to press a kiss on it.

He couldn't really remember much of the ceremony. Only that they both promised to love each other forever and that they both said I do before they were pronounced husband and wife. They shared a drink with Tony, Pepper and Ruth Bader Ginsburg (again, how did Nat know her?!) and then they were alone in the penthouse dancing to the songs Nat had been teaching him to dance to.

"Now that we're alone, I can tell you my vows." Natasha whispered. "I didn't want the others to hear them."

He played with her engagement ring and wedding band. "Okay, _how_ do you know RGB?"

She laughed. "I saved her life a few times and she gives me advice with legalities from time to time." She kissed him. "Now back to my vows. The Red Room made us think that love...love was just an illusion. A fantasy for children and I believed that. Then one night in 1944, I go to a bar and this sweet boy walks in and my heart starts racing." She smiled up at him. "I'm spellbound by him. I go over to him and we talk. The whole night until the bar closes. He walks me home because he's a gentleman and he comes up and we make love." She grinned. "Two times. I fall in love with him and I want to run away with him because I realize that love is real and it's exciting and it's _everything_. But love is also painful because I hear about his death and my heart is broken for over seven decades." He tightened his hold on her waist. "I thought our story was over before it even started but then...you came back to me and you healed me. I know that true love is not an illusion because I found it with you. And I know that I will _always_ love you. I always have and I always will."

He blinked his tears away, moved by her words. "I haven't really...prepared anything." He admitted ashamed. "But I know that I was born to love you. There is no one else for me. You are my first and only one for everything. The only girl I'll ever kiss, the only girl I'll ever make love to and the only girl I will ever love. It's always been you. Even before we met. My heart was always meant for _you_."

A tear was rolling down her cheek and he wiped it away with his thumb. "That was pretty good, Steve." She laughed softly. "I can't tell you how happy I am that you're my husband. I wanted this for so fucking long."

"I know. I dreamed about our wedding all the time during the war."

They danced until the earlier hours of the morning and he was glad that he was already healed enough so that he could carry his _wife_ over the threshold and make love to her on their wedding night.

* * *

_2015_

Searching for Bucky was...hard and exhausting. They were close to him a few times but arrived when he'd already been gone. Steve would be lost without his wife. He had no clue how to search for someone and he would lose his mind without her. Bucky was out there and needed him and he wasn't there for him. And Natasha...God, Natasha was _so good_ to him. She listened to him and comforted him. And he hated himself that she had to spend her first year of marriage basically on the run. They were both aware of the fact that Hydra was still out there and wanting the Winter Soldier back. Natasha called in a lot of favors and together they followed every clue around the world. She'd dyed her hair brunette and left her engagement ring in a safe at Avengers Tower, she'd told him not to change his look so Bucky could recognize him. So far that they been lucky and they hadn't run into Hydra.

Another lead turned into nothing and they were staying at a motel near Sofia. Natasha dropped her thigh holster onto the coffee table. "You can use the shower first." She said with a small smile. "I'll get us dinner."

"Thank you." He breathed out. He could never really tell her how much he needed her. He couldn't do this without her. He walked over to cup her face and kiss her. "I love you."

"And I love you." She pecked his lips again and shoved a gun into the back of her jeans before she left the motel room. He went into the tiny bedroom and took a hot shower careful to leave enough hot water for his wife. He wasn't so sure if a cheap motel like this had an unlimited supply of hot water. He changed into clean clothes and laid down on the bed. Where was Buck and why didn't he come to him? He had to remember! He'd saved him, he'd pulled him out of the water so he had to remember!

He was so deep in thought that he didn't notice Natasha coming back and leaning over him. "Hey." She whispered and kissed him. "Let's eat." He nodded and let her drag him out of bed. They ate dinner in silence with Natasha rubbing his thigh every now and then to comfort him.

Natasha threw the containers after dinner into the trash and he pulled her into his arms to kiss her deeply. She still tasted like their dinner. "Can we? Tonight?"

Her soft hands moved underneath his shirt. "Of course." She whispered and kissed him again. They didn't make love often and he felt bad that they spent their honeymoon phase like _this. _Their actual honeymoon had just been one night in Paris before they'd gone after Bucky. He was a terrible husband, his beautiful wife deserved so much more. He pulled her shirt over her head and walked her to the bed to give her one night of that famous phase where newlyweds were all over each other.

Later that night Natasha was pressing kisses onto his shoulder. "Talk to me."

"What if we don't find him?"

"We will. He can't hide from me forever. I will find him for you." She promised and she sounded so convinced that he believed her.

He rolled onto his side to face her. "I'm sorry the beginning of our marriage is like this."

She inched closer to him and kissed him. "We're going to be together for...well, pretty much _forever_. We have decades and decades ahead of us. It won't be always like this. This just...this makes us stronger. Everything we do together strengthens our bond and love."

"It's still isn't fair to you."

"Life's not fair, babe." She smiled sadly. "Just look at us and _how long_ it took for us to end up together. We'll get Bucky home. I know we will."

"I would have found you." He blurted out and Natasha furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. "I would have come for you...if you still had been with _them_." He clarified. "I wouldn't have stopped until you were free. Until you could live your life the way you wanted."

"Steve-" She cupped his face and slanted their lips together. "I love you."

* * *

Weeks and weeks passed by without any good lead on Bucky. They been in almost every European country and run into Hydra twice. One time Natasha had gotten hurt during a fight and he'd seen red. It hadn't been a deep wound and she hadn't needed stitches but that moment when she'd yelled and pressed a hand to her side...God, he'd just wanted to kill in that moment.

Natasha insisted that they had a night off and booked a hotel suite in a fancy hotel in Rome. And of course she was right that they needed it. The thought to return home was on his mind more and more. He couldn't do this to Natasha for much longer. He was her _husband_ and he had to give her a real home where she was _safe._

He decided to push all thoughts of Bucky away and to just have a romantic night with his wife. They took a bath together and then left to go to a little restaurant near the hotel. Natasha looked beautiful in her red dress and spoke perfect Italian when she ordered for them. They strolled through the city before they went back to their hotel. That night he made sure that his wife knew how much he loved and appreciated her.

He pillowed his head on her naked chest and ran his hand up and down her arm. Natasha pressed a kiss on top of his head. "Did you just marry me so you could use my boobs as your pillow?" She chuckled and toyed with his hair.

"Of course." He joked and pressed a kiss on her breast. Natasha hummed and tugged on his hair so he would move up. They kissed and kissed until even he was panting into her mouth. "Do you want to go home?"

Nat blinked a few times at him and brushed her thumb over his cheek. "What? Where is that coming from?"

"I just...It's been ten months and we still didn't find him. Maybe it's time to go home." He nuzzled her with his nose to breathe her scent in. The possessive side of him loved it that he also smelled his aftershave on her. "Go back to Brooklyn and buy a house."

Natasha closed her eyes. "I want that. I really do, but we can't. Your friend is still out there and...I know that you won't find any peace until you have him back."

She was right, but he couldn't be selfish anymore. She was his wife and she would always come first. Even before his best friend. _I'm sorry, Buck. _"We can't live like this forever, sweetheart."

"I know." She nodded and wrapped her delicate arms around his shoulders. "I know. Just...Let's wait for the next lead and if that is a bust...then we can go home."

"Okay." God, she was so understanding and supportive. He didn't deserve her.

Someone of Natasha's contacts heard of a man that kind of fitted Bucky's description but Steve wasn't too hopeful. There had been many times where there had been this kind of lead and then it had been somebody completely different or Buck had been long gone. Natasha still wanted to go to Bucharest and he promised himself that they would go home after this. They would go back to Brooklyn and buy a house there.

He wasn't surprised that Natasha spoke Romanian and she asked around and came back to the little park where he was waiting for her. "I think this is the right place. A man who _always_ wears long sleeves and a glove on his left hand buys plumbs regularly on the farmers' market. He's shy and barely talks but he knows the language and is friendly. The description fits your friend. I think we found him."

He felt hope stirring inside of him, but it felt too good to be true. "You know where that guy lives?"

"Somewhere in that industrialized apartment block over there." She got her tablet out of his backpack. "I'll hack into the files of the co-administration, maybe I find something." He watched her face while her eyes where glued on the tablet and her fingers danced across the screen. She looked really positive that they found Bucky. Maybe she was right. Her eyes lit up and she looked at him. "I think I have him. This lease looks suspiciously unsuspicious and the tenant always pays in cash. "Let's go."

"No." He immediately said and Natasha looked surprised. "I'll go and you wait in the car."

"No. We go together."

"Nat, if this is really him and he's not in control...What if he hurts you?!" He couldn't live with that!

"That's why we're going together, Steve! End of discussion!" She shoved her tablet back into the backpack. "Let's go, darling."

He took a deep breath and nodded. He followed Nat through the apartment building until she stopped in front of a door on the fifth floor. "That's it." She knelt down to unlocked the door with a bobby pin and opened it. He stepped inside first and looked around. It didn't look very comfy. Whoever lived here seemed not be very attached to this place. They wouldn't have a problem to leave within five minutes. He found a journal on top of the fridge and opened it. His heart started racing. That was Bucky's handwriting! A photo fell out of the journal and Nat picked up.

"Looks like we're in the right place." She said softly and handed the photo to him. It showed him and Bucky in their uniforms. God, Nat had found him!

He looked up and Bucky was standing behind Natasha. He had been so quiet that they both didn't hear him. Steve quickly grabbed Natasha and pushed her behind him. "Do you know who I am?"

Buck clenched his jaw. "Steve. That's what it said in the museum." He knew that Bucky was lying and hadn't read that in the museum. "I'm not coming with you."

"Bucky-" He began but got interrupted.

"No. You two should leave."

Natasha spoke up. "Steve, wait downstairs in the car." He turned around to look at her. "I need to talk to Barnes alone." Something in her eyes told him that she knew what she was doing.

"Okay." He nodded and left reluctantly the small apartment. He walked back to their rental car and switched between staring at the clock on his phone and the windows of the fifth floor. He knew that Natasha was good and that she could hold her own, but he was still worried. His Buck would never hurt her but...He wasn't really that Buck anymore, was he? What were they talking about? Could she really convince him to come with them? Was it over? Would Bucky come home?

He waited for over thirty minutes and he was ready to check on Natasha when he saw her walking through the front door of the building and behind her was Bucky! He had a backpack with him and looked around while they walked to the car. Natasha opened the passenger door and got in while Bucky sat down in the back.

"Always knew you'd marry a bossy girl." Bucky mumbled and Natasha grinned at him. He gave her hand a squeeze and started the engine.

* * *

_2016_

Steve walked back into their new kitchen after he'd walked Bucky to the door and thanked him again for helping with the furniture. Two super soldiers hadn't needed much time to unload the truck and Nat had told them where to put everything.

His heart stopped beating for a second when he saw Nat standing on the kitchen counter to be tall enough to put things into the cupboards. He hated it when she did that! She could fall and seriously hurt herself! But he had to admit that the view was really nice.

"I know you're staring at my ass, Rogers!" Nat chuckled and turned around. She stretched her arms out and made grabby hands.

He came closer and she jumped down into his arms. "I could have put that away."

"No." She shook her head. "You already carried half our furniture around today. It was a very sexy." She laughed and kissed him. "You still got some energy left?" She wiggled her eyebrows and he laughed.

"For _this? _Always." He murmured and trailed kisses on her jaw and neck. "The bed's not built up yet."

"So we'll just use the wall." She smirked and her hands moved to his belt. He blushed furiously thinking back to the day they'd _finally_ found this house and the realtor had left to let them look at the house alone and they'd both loved the house so much that they ended up having sex against the living room wall. And then upstairs against the bedroom wall. His face had been red as a tomato when he'd given the realtor the keys back and told her that they'd wanted the house.

Natasha laughed like she knew what he was thinking about. "I'm so glad we got this house and immediately christened it when we checked it out. You didn't ambush me in the other houses."

Steve snorted. "Excuse me? You were the one who pushed me against the wall and pretty much ripped my pants off."

Natasha grinned happily. "Interested in a reenactment?"

He laughed and pressed her against the first wall available. "Of course."

* * *

He came home to Natasha and Bucky sitting on the floor and playing Monopoly in the living room. His wife and his best friend had become good friends over time. It had taken Bucky some time to realize that Natasha was actually Natalia from the bar. His memory had still been fuzzy, but when he'd recognized her he'd laughed and said that he'd known that Steve would never settle for a different girl. The day he'd remembered that he'd shot Natasha twice had been bad and he had literally been on his knees apologizing and asking for her forgiveness.

"Hi, babe." Natasha grinned and he walked over to her to give her a kiss. He noticed that she'd gotten a new plant for the room. She'd decorated their new house with a lot of love and devotion. She'd done pretty much the whole house but he'd used her time away on a mission to turn one of the rooms upstairs into a little ballet studio with mirrors on the wall and a ballet barre. She'd had been so touched and happy that she'd jumped into his arms and they'd made love in her new ballet room. Natasha pulled him out of that nice memory. "How was it with Tony?"

"Intense. He babbled something about a project called Ultron but Pepper immediately said no."

Nat chuckled and kissed him again. Bucky made gagging noises. "Hello?! I'm still here!"

Steve sat down behind Nat and wrapped his arms around his wife. "Hey, Buck." He noticed that Nat had way more Monopoly money than Buck.

"Your wife is cheating! I don't know how but she is!"

"You're just mad that you're so bad at this!" Nat laughed and Steve buried his face in her hair to hide his grin. Bucky was a sore loser but Steve couldn't completely rule out that Nat_ wasn't_ cheating.

Natasha decided to take a bath after Bucky had given her all of his Monopoly money and Steve really wanted to join her but he also wanted to enjoy a beer with Buck.

"How nice of you to stay here with me when I know that you rather want to rub your wife's back." Bucky teased.

"Shut up." He replied like a grown up and took a sip from his beer.

His best friend laughed. "I still can't believe you're a married man. This life suits you. I always knew you were meant to be a husband."

"Thanks?"

Bucky laughed and they finished their beers in a comfortable silence. He was so grateful that Bucky was back and safe. That he had his free will back and could do whatever he wanted. Bucky left with the comment that he should go before Steve would kick him out so he could do his marital obligations. Steve rolled his eyes at him but he immediately jogged up the stairs when Bucky was gone.

Natasha was in their bedroom sitting in front of her vanity and braiding her long red hair into a braid. She saw him in the mirror and smiled. "Bucky gone?"

"Yup."

"Good." Natasha smirked and stood up so he could see what she was wearing. She wore a dark green satin babydoll that made her legs look extra long.

"New?" He licked his lips. She looked incredible. She always did.

"Yup. You like it?" She did a little twirl and he nodded eagerly. How could he not? She was his dream girl and he was the luckiest guy in the whole world that she wanted _him_. "Then show me." She whispered and fell down on their bed.

* * *

He was sitting on the couch sketching a portrait of Natasha for her birthday when he heard her coming home. They had the day off and Natasha had left in the morning saying she had errands to run. He had been a bit disappointed because he'd hoped to spend the day with her in bed. He closed his sketch book and walked into the hallway.

"Hi, sweetheart."

"Hi." She pointed at two pizza boxes on the dresser. "I got dinner."

He took the food and brought it to the living room where he sat it on the table. "How was your day?"

"Good." His wife answered who followed him. "I...I have a surprise for you."

"Okay?" He sat down on the couch and Nat joined him with her purse in her lap. "What is it?"

She pulled something out of her purse and handed it to him. It was her passport. Why was she giving that to him. "Look inside." She was a mix between pride and nervousness.

He did as he was told but didn't get what she meant with all of this. He glanced over the info and then looked twice. _Natasha Rogers _was written there.

"What?"

"I changed my name. The paperwork is finally through."

"You didn't...I never expected you to take my name."

She smiled. "I know and I didn't do it for you. I did it for me. Romanoff or Romanova was never my name, just an alias given by the Red Room and then Fury. It has no meaning to me. It's just a name. But Rogers...That's who I wanna be. I wanna be the person good enough to carry that name. It's the name of my family. Of my home and heart. I _want_ to be Natasha Rogers."

"Nat..." He tried to blink his tears away. He was so moved that she'd chosen _his _name as her new one. "I...Thank you for thinking that my name is worthy of that."

She smiled. "Thank you for thinking that I'm worthy of that name."

He pulled her into his arms. "So you're Mrs. Steve Rogers now?" He asked with a grin.

Natasha elbowed him in the stomach. "I'm _Natasha_ Rogers, dork."

He laughed and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "Fine by me. Fine by me, sweetheart."


	4. Chapter 4

_2017_

It was Winter and fucking cold outside. Steve had always loved the winter even though he'd gotten especially sick during the time but he'd loved to go ice skating or have snowball fights with Bucky when he had been healthy enough for it. But then he'd crashed a plane into the ice and missed seventy years of being with his one true love.

Said one true love mumbled something in her sleep and pressed herself closer to him to soak up his heat. He smiled down at her and pulled up the blankets up Natasha was covered by them up until her face. She hated the cold and was freezing all the time. Not that she admitted that to anyone besides him. She clung to him when they were alone and he loved that she snuggled against him to warm up.

He checked the time and they had to get up soon to be punctual for the weekly team meeting at Avengers Tower. "Sweetheart." He pressed a kiss on the top of her head. "Wake up."

"Ngh." Natasha murmured and buried her face in his chest. He had the suspicion that Natasha was a little bear and needed hibernation to survive the winter. He rubbed his hands in circles over her back. "Can we just stay in bed all day? It's still dark outside." She mumbled into his shirt.

He laughed and squeezed her cute ass. "I can make you pancakes. Or French toast. How about waffles? What do you want to eat?"

Natasha moved her head up to look at him. She looked adorable with her tousled hair and sleepy eyes. She blinked a few times and then gave him a wolfish grin. Looked like his wife was waking up. "What do _you_ wanna eat?" She wiggled her eyebrows. "Me?"

"That was terrible." He laughed and rolled her onto her back and moved down her body until he was with his head between her legs. "I can't believe I married such a dork. And people think you're scary." He winked at her and Natasha grinned and patted his head before he pulled her pyjama pants and panties down.

Natasha looked very happy with herself while she watched him make them breakfast. She made horrible innuendos that made him more laugh than anything else but it didn't stop him from throwing a giggling Nat over his shoulder and marching with her into the bathroom. The shower was filled with hot steam, laughter and soft moans and they stayed inside until the hot water was gone.

"Just what I needed to get through a meeting with Stark." Natasha sighed and arched her back. He chuckled and stepped into his boots. Natasha came over to him swaying her hips but it looked more adorable than sexy in her snow boots. "I love you." She whispered and hugged him. "I love you so much."

She always told him that she loved him before they left the house. She never said those words out loud when they were in public. "I love you, too."

She smiled softly and pulled his head down. "Can we have a date night tonight?" She asked before kissing him.

"Of course. Anything you want."

Natasha grinned. "Good, I already have an idea."

The weekly meeting took hours with the whole team going over situations that might needed the Avengers to intervene and going over potential new recruits. They had video conferences with the President and then the UN General Secretary and it was pretty late when they could finally go home.

"It's a bit late to book a table somewhere." He noticed when he and Natasha left the tower.

"We have everything we need at home." She said with a soft smile and got into the car where Happy was waiting for them and drove them home. Natasha told him not to come into the living room until she called for him and he waited in the bedroom wondering what she was up to now. He heard her calling his name and he came back downstairs. She'd moved the furniture around and the fire place warming the room. An sheet was in front of it and she was just wearing a rope.

"Nat?" He asked a bit confused.

She pointed at paint tubes and brushes on the coffee table and let her robe fall to the ground. "I want you to draw on me. Do you want to?"

He swallowed and nodded. "Yeah."

"Great." She smiled. "These paints are especially made for skin, so don't worry." She lowered herself onto the sheet in front of the fire place. "Come on, darling. Draw on me like one of your French girls."

He chuckled and got out of his clothes until he was only in his boxer briefs. He took the paint and a brush and started to draw. Inspired by her tattoo he covered her entire body in flowers. She looked like garden Eden to him. She was his paradise. His wife shivered when the brush touched sensitive parts of her skin and she was looking at his face the entire time while he was using her as a canvas.

"I think I'm done." He leaned down to kiss her. "Thank you."

"My phone is over there so you can take pictures. But don't show them to anyone or you're sleeping on the couch forever, mister!" She quipped, knowing that he would never let anyone see her like this. He kissed her again before he grabbed her phone. Nat posed for him and the took dozen of pictures and showed them to her. "Wow, you're so good at this. It looks beautiful."

"_You_ look beautiful." He corrected and Natasha beamed. They took a long and hot bath together and shared a pie after they cleaned up the living room. Natasha fell asleep as soon as they went to bed (little bears needed their sleep) and he held her tightly thanking his lucky stars that he ended up with this amazing and perfect woman.

* * *

"Are you two ever gonna have a real wedding?" Bucky asked him when he was over to the watch the game with him. Bucky had been too furious when he'd found out that the Dodgers were now in LA.

"Hm?"

"Didn't you say that you wanted to have a party at the Bartons or something like that when your life was more quiet?" Bucky asked, looking guilty. Neither he or Nat had ever told him that he had been the reason for their shotgun wedding but he'd figured it out on his own. "Look with the paybacks from the Army...I can pay for a second wedding for you guys."

"Buck-"

"No, let me do this. You've been talking about your wedding to her since the war. It's my fault you never had a real wedding."

"No, Buck. It's not your fault and I think our wedding was perfect. Not everyone we wanted was there but it was still very romantic. We're both not the people for a big fancy wedding. Nat was right when she said that she just wanted to be married to me. We're married and that's all I care about."

"Then let me pay for a honeymoon!"

"We don't want your money. I appreciate it but it's not necessary."

Bucky stayed after the game still trying to convince him to let him give them a wedding or honeymoon. It was very sweet of him, but they didn't need that. They had been married for almost two years and Nat had never mentioned another wedding again.

"Hi, boys." Natasha yelled from the hallway and he got up to greet his wife. She had problems to get out of her boots and he helped her out of them. Natasha laughed and pulled him down to kiss her. It was still cold outside but at least there was no snow or ice. "Did you guys win?"

"No." He laughed and kissed her forehead.

"Oh." Natasha said and stood up from the little bench in their hallway. "Well, I got you something on my little shopping trip with the girls." He knew that Natasha still had a small problem to adjust to the fact that she had friends now. Multiple friends and even female ones.

"You didn't have to get me anything, sweetheart."

"I saw the leather jacket and just had to get it for you." She slung her arms around his neck. "You can show me your gratitude in the bedroom later. Remember when you tied me to the headboard and-"

"God, stop!" Bucky yelled from the living room. "Steve's not the only one with enhanced hearing. I don't wanna hear this stuff! _Yuck_!"

Natasha grinned and rose to her tiptoes to whisper into his ear what she wanted him to do to her later tonight. His ears were still pink when they walked into the living room. He really hoped that Bucky hadn't heard that, it was no one's business what they did in the bedroom.

Bucky offered again to pay for a second wedding or a honeymoon but Natasha politely turned down his offer. His best friend seemed more convinced when Natasha said no this time.

He was putting the dishes into the dishwasher when Natasha padded into the room. "A vacation would be nice. We haven't been on one in ages." She said, wrapped her arms around his waist. "Just you and me somewhere warm where I don't have to wear three pairs of socks. Like a tropical island."

"That sounds great." He agreed and kissed her. Their only vacation had been in London when he'd asked her to marry him. "You think Buck would spring for a tropical island?"

She laughed. "I don't want him to pay for that."

They decided to go to Mauritius and had a wonderful time. They explored the island and went swimming and diving, enjoyed long walks on the beach, found out that making love on a beach sounded better than it actually was (he cringed when Nat complained that she had sand _everywhere.) _and just focused only on each other. He liked it the most when they were entangled in a hammock looking at the ocean and were just together. He found out that Natasha had freckles when she was in the sun for a long time and he was just charmed by it.

"Do you think we'll retire one day?" Nat asked her eyes still on the beautiful ocean in front of them. "Retire and buy a house at a beach?"

"Do you want that?" He whispered into her hair that smelled like sea salt and coco nuts.

"Yeah. Some day just you and me living somewhere warm." She craned her neck to look at him. Her eyes were shining and she smiled softly. "I don't have to share you with anyone and we'll make love all day."

"All day, huh?" He chuckled and kissed her forehead. "Sounds very optimistic. I'm not getting any younger. I'm turning 100 next year. Maybe three times a day will be realistic."

Natasha snorted and pressed a kiss to his jaw. "That's not enough. It's never going to be enough, I'll always want more of you. And we're going to be young pretty much _forever_. But can you imagine hanging the shield up and letting someone else save the world?"

"Yes." He said immediately. "I don't wanna live this life forever. One day we retire and just live our life. You and me, making love all day on a beach."

"But please on a blanket. I took me hours to get rid of the sand!" She punched his chest and then laid her head on it. "But that sounds nice. Just you and me enjoying our life together."

"Do you think we'll _ever_ age?" He whispered.

"I don't know. Bruce doesn't seem to think so." Natasha must have sensed his confusion. "I asked him since he's the expert on the topic. Our serums are fighting against the aging process since it's a weakness."

"So you're be still wearing tiny bikinis way into your two hundreds? Those things should be illegal." He asked, tugging on the waist band of her bikini panties, but he almost shivered when he thought about _how long_ they could be together. He really had an eternity with her. He somehow knew that still wouldn't be enough. His hand slipped into her bikini bottom to brush his finger over her tattoo.

"You're such a man sometimes." She laughed and snuggled closer to him and they both took a nap.

* * *

Natasha decided to throw Bucky a party for his 100th birthday and rented out a bar. Bucky didn't show it but Steve could tell that he was moved by it. The whole team came and Natasha was very intent to have Bucky and Pepper's new assistant Darcy Lewis talk to each other all evening.

"Are you trying to set them up?" He asked with a grin while he joined her at the bar where she was making herself a drink.

"What? Me?" She replied with a sly grin on her face. She held her drink up to him so he could take a sip. "Good?"

"Yeah. But you didn't answer my question, sweetheart."

Nat laughed and took his hand to play with his wedding band. "You know me so well, husband of mine. Lewis just mentioned what a beefcake Bucky is and that she needed to get laid."

"Nat!"

"What? Her words, not mine. And don't you think that Buck deserves some happiness? Darcy is not looking for something serious, just some fun and that could be good for Bucky. I know he's not ready for a real relationship. Maybe something happens between them, maybe not." She cupped his jaw with her hand and turned his head into the direction of the small dance floor. "They look comfortable with each other." Nat was right. Darcy was making silly dance moves around Buck who was laughing.

"Okay, you have a point." He admitted and leaned down to kiss her. "Have I told you how good you look tonight?"

"You did. I know you have a thing for my legs in short skirts." She grinned and ran her hands up and down his arms. "And I have a thing for you in too tight button downs. You wanna check out the bathrooms here?"

"You have to pee?" He asked dumbly.

"God, you're so cute sometimes." She took his hand and on their way to the rest room he realized what she meant. Half an hour later they stumbled out of the bathroom and ran into Tony who gave them a smug grin clearly knowing what he and Nat had been doing in that bathroom.

Bucky and Darcy were still talking and maybe something good could happen between them. God knew that Bucky deserved it. His best friend thanked Natasha again for the party before she swung her leg over Steve's bike and sat down behind him and he drove them home. Darcy and Bucky only went on a few dates until they both decided to just be friends but Steve could see that it had been good for his best friend to put himself out there again.

He was checking if all the doors and windows were locked while Natasha was upstairs in the bathroom cleaning herself up and getting ready for bed. She just came into the bedroom when he came back to her. They both slid into bed and Natasha snuggled against him

"You already know what you wanna do for your 100th?" Natasha asked and kissed his neck. "I wouldn't be surprised if the mayor or even the President want to throw you a big party next year."

"Oh God, I don't want that." He hated that kind of attention. He always shut down Tony's idea to go on Late night shows. He just wanted to do his job and then go home. "I don't want a party. Just a day off with my girl. That's all I want."

He felt her smile against his skin. "I think that can be arranged. And what do you want for your 99th birthday this year?"

"Just a day off with my girl." He told her truthfully.

"I'm seeing a pattern here." She chuckled and kissed his neck again. "I won't be mad if you wanna do something with the guys."

"That's sweet, but I missed so many birthdays with you. I wanna spend every next one with you. With my wife. With the person I love most in the world."

"You're such a sap." Natasha replied sleepily but he heard in her voice that she was happy about that. Maybe he was a sap but he hated it when he was away from her. And if it was just for a day or two because of a mission. They had spent enough time apart from each other. He had the luxury of sleeping through the seventy years but his Natalia had to live with that pain every single day. She barely spoke about that time but he knew that it had been very painful for her. She'd admitted one night that she'd almost hated Laura and Clint in the beginning because they had something she'd thought she could never have. He tightened his hold around her and Natasha sighed in her sleep. God, he loved this woman so much.

* * *

Natasha had broken her ankle during a mission in Pakistan and was on bed rest which she did not like _at all_. She healed faster than normal people but she was still on break for at least a week. Today was only day four and she had been pretty grumpy this morning when he'd left for a training session at the Tower.

"Sweetheart?" He yelled through the house when he came home. He looked for her in the living room where she had been when he'd left the house this morning.

"I'm here!" Natasha answered from the little patio outside.

"Hi, sweetheart." He leaned down to press a kiss on her hair. She was sitting on a lounge chair with her laptop on her lap. "What are you looking at?"

"Just browsing the internet." She replied and puckered her lips. He chuckled and gave her a kiss. "How was your day?"

"Good. Training was very good. Rhodey is a great addition to the team. I'm glad he finally caved in and joined us." He sat down on the other chair. "How was your day?"

"Boring! I pretty much just watched Netflix and then limped outside when the sun came out." She closed her laptop. "I hate being like this!"

"I know, but it won't be for long. You're probably back on your pretty little feet next week."

Natasha snorted. "Do I detect there a little foot fetish?"

He rolled his eyes. "No."

She stretched her healthy leg out and wiggled her toes. "Are you sure?"

"Yup. What do you want for dinner? I think we still have some tuna steaks in the freezer."

"Sounds good but before that you have to make out with me." She grinned and leaned back. He pretended like it was a burden to humor Nat but he had no problem to lower himself carefully onto her and spent the next twenty minutes or so to kiss her deeply. Natasha's cheeks were flushed and her lips swollen. "Hm, you're such a great kisser. I think my ankle would heal so much quicker if you'd kiss me all day."

"I got no plans tomorrow." He whispered and kissed her until her stomach started to growl. He pulled away with a chuckle and left to make dinner for them. Natasha followed him and jumped onto the kitchen counter and ordered him to make out with her until the dinner was done.

He stayed the next day at home with her and they spent most of the day kissing and cuddling. Natasha tried a few times to get into his pants but he stopped her every time chuckling and kissing her to distract her from her mission. They read a book together and discussed it after they were done. Natasha's weird brace thing for her ankle designed by Dr. Cho was removed a week later and Natasha attacked him the moment they stepped into their house to have her way with him.

It surprised him when Natasha started to tell him about things that she'd done while he had been in the ice. She usually never shared stories about that time since she somehow feared that he'd think less of her which was not possible. He knew that she'd had no free will and wouldn't have done those things if she'd had a choice.

"Do you wanna go clubbing with me?" She once asked him over lunch at a bistro near the Tower. "You've been acclimated to this time and I'm wondering if you're ready for a club."

"Um...where's that coming from?" She'd never gone clubbing since they gotten together. And they were reunited for almost five years now.

"I love dancing, you know that." She smiled. "I just like the energy in a club. The music and all those people around you dancing. You can just let yourself loose to the music."

"Am I...Aren't you going clubbing because of me?" He asked, feeling guilty.

"No! I rather spend time with my husband then go out alone but I thought that you're maybe comfortable enough to try it? We don't have to go if you don't want to!"

"No, no. I'll try it." He promised. He would do it for her. The thought of going to a club was a bit scary but he'd do it for her. Maybe he'd like it, even though he was a terrible dancer.

"You know, I was a Go-Go dancer in the sixties." She laughed. "I had the boots and dress and everything. It was a cover for an op but I made a lot of money during that time. And I had to pose as a stripper in the nineties. You want me to give you a show tonight? A lap dance maybe?"

"You don't have to do that." He reached over the table to hold her hand. "You never have to do that." She had still been working for the Russians in the nineties so that meant that she hadn't done the stripper job because she'd wanted to.

"I know." She smiled sweetly. "That's why I'm offering. I know that you'll never make me something that I don't want to. But I want to do that for you. I think you'll like it."

And from that day on, Natasha told him more about her past, she left the bloody details out but she shared more with him. The show he got that night had was great and them going clubbing was _interesting. _He had no idea how to move but Natasha put his hands on her waist and started to move to the music. Several girls hit on him while he was _basically grinding with his wife_ on the dance floor and Natasha got so annoyed by the whole thing that she dragged him home and pushed him onto the bed crawling on top of him.

"Nat, I'm sorry." He whispered.

"It's not your fault. You did nothing wrong." She said and ripped his shirt open. "But you are _mine."_

_"_Forever." He promised and let Natasha do to him whatever she wanted. They blasted club music through their living room the next night and Natasha showed off dance moves that made his jeans pretty tight.

* * *

_2018_

Natasha stormed down the hallway towards the room they would be staying at during their time at the_ Playground_. They all had been shocked that Coulson was still alive, but he knew that it had hit his wife the hardest. She acted like it was no big deal and but as soon as the meeting was over she left Coulson's office. He didn't know what he should think about SHIELD still existing, but he had more important things to do now. His wife was upset and hurt and she needed him.

He opened the door and poked his head through. "Do you want to be alone?"

She was standing in the middle of the room with her back to him, hugging herself. "You're the only one I want to see right now."

He shrugged his leather jacket off and threw it on the bed before he made his way over to her. He turned her around and pulled her into a hug. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

She buried her face into his shirt. "No."

"Okay." He simply answered and held her as long as she needed him to walking them to the bed sitting down. Natasha crawled into his lap and buried her face into the crook of his neck. "I'm here."

"Thank you." She mumbled. "You're the only one who trusts me."

"Clint trusts you. And Bucky does too. Everyone on the team does."

"But you're different. You'll always honest with me. You wouldn't have let me believe that you were dead for five years. You would have come to me."

He rubbed his hand over her back hoping it was soothing. "That's true." Nothing could have kept him away from her. _Nothing_. "I'm not defending him, but I think he thought he was doing the right thing."

"Coulson always took me out to dinner on my birthday. He got me books and CDs while I was in containment after I deflected. He let me sleep on his couch after I was released from custody and didn't have a place yet. I thought he cared about me. I almost told him about you. He admired you so much and said you were his moral compass and I let it almost slip that I knew you. Coulson knows my real age. I trusted him. I _mourned_ him!"

He didn't know what to tell her. So he held her tighter and let her deal with her inner struggle. He knew that she wouldn't cry, but he could feel how upset and hurt she was.

He searched for Coulson while Natasha was in the gym letting her frustrations out on May and Morse who'd also known that Coulson was still alive. He found the new director of SHIELD still sitting in his office. He just walked in without knocking on the door.

Coulson looked up. "Oh, I thought you were Romanoff." Steve didn't bother to tell him that her name was Rogers now.

"She won't come to you. You should know that." He said sharply and sat down on the chair in front of Coulson's desk.

"I thought she changed." Coulson pointed at Steve's wedding ring. "I never thought that she would get married. She is _your_ wife, right? Or are two married to other people?"

"No, she's my wife."

"And she's happy?" Coulson asked hesitantly like he was unsure if he was allowed to ask that. "I always wanted her to find peace."

"I think so. She says that she happy. And she would _never_ lie to me."

Coulson sighed. "I wanted to tell you, but Fury ordered me not to. I was following orders. You people can understand that."

"Don't try to pull me into this. You hurt her deeply. She was devastated when you died. She didn't show it at SHIELD, but she was heartbroken over your death."

"I didn't realize you two had become friends so quickly after New York."

_Shit. "_I guess we're kindred spirits. You have to apologize to her. She thinks you never cared about her."

"What? Of course, I do. She's like a dau- She's very important to me. I wanted to tell her, but Fury said she was fine. Said that she was working with you and everything was going well. He even said that he had the suspicion that you two were more than partners." Coulson smiled a little. "I'm really glad that she has you. I always hoped that she would open herself up to finding someone. But she always said that there had only been one man for her and he'd died years ago." Coulson furrowed his eyebrows. "I always wondered who she was talking about. Has she ever said anything to you?"

He wouldn't tell Coulson that_ he_ was that man. "I'm not going to talk with you about Natasha's private life. She's my wife, I won't betray her trust."

"That's fair, I guess."

Coulson offered him a drink but he was in no mood to have one with a man who'd hurt his Natasha. He could understand that Coulson had been following orders but if Steve had learned one thing than that it was never smart to trust Fury blindly. He left Coulson's office after reminding him in his Captain America voice that he had to talk to Natasha.

Natasha was already in their room for the night when he got back. She was lying on the bed staring at the ceiling. He got out of his jeans and joined her. He was relieved when she moved to drape herself around him. "How are you?" He asked and breathed in the scent of her shampoo.

"Better. I got to kick May and Bobbi's asses so that lifted my spirit. We're good." She gave him a knowing look. "You talked to Phil, didn't you?"

He brushed her hair out of her face. "Yeah. I told him to talk to you. He knows that he hurt you. He's sorry even though he has a hard time admitting it." He ran his fingers over her arm. "You told Coulson about me?"

"Hm? No."

"You told him there was a man but he died."

"Oh." Her hand on his shoulder gripped him harder. "He had been bugging me to go out and meet someone. Telling me to just go on dates and I got angry at him. I couldn't just go on dates. Not when I was still in love with my sweet Steve." She smiled sadly. "So I told him that much so he would drop the topic. And he did."

Natasha now seemed even more upset that she had shared this with Coulson and he just told her stories about his mother to calm her down. He told her about the many times his mother had been done with him when he'd gotten into trouble again. God, he wished that his mother could have met Natasha. Both women had made him into the man he was today. It hurt a little to talk about his ma, but the real smile on his wife's face was worth it. And Sarah Rogers should be remembered.

Together with Coulson's team they managed to capture the enhanced individuals without any casualties on both sides. He saw how Coulson took Natasha to the side when they were back at the playground and she only came back when they were ready to board the jet.

"Coulson still alive?" Tony quipped before he disappeared into the cockpit. Natasha glared at him before she sat down next to Steve.

"And?"

"We talked. I'm still a bit pissed, but I don't want to waste energy on it. What's done is done." She smiled a little. "It's okay. You don't have to worry about me."

"Do you want me to go back and beat him up for you?" He joked and Natasha shook her head in amusement. She looked around and he knew that it was to make sure that no one was paying attention to them and kissed him.

"My dork." She whispered and intertwined their fingers.

* * *

"Okay, you have to go!" Natasha laughed between kisses, but didn't pull away from him. He chuckled and pressed her against the wall in the hallway. "Steve, you're going to be late!"

"Mhm." He agreed and kissed her again, his hands touching her everywhere he could. He would be in DC for the next few days and he didn't really want to leave his wife. "You think they'll notice if I don't come?"

"No, _of course_ not. People won't notice if Captain America is not at a security conference where he's supposed to represent the Avengers." She laughed and slid her hands under his shirt. "You'll be only gone for three days, darling." She ran her nails over his stomach and he shivered. His wife was a little tease! She knew how much he liked that! "I'll make you your favorite dinner when you're back. I might even wear something _nice _for you. Maybe something black and lacy?" She grinned and pulled his head down to kiss him. "Now go before Hill tries to kick in the door."

He cupped her beautiful face and basked in the way she looked at him. "I love you."

"I love you." She smiled and took his left hand to take his ring off since there would be press and they didn't want the world to know about their marriage. Their relationship was sacred. "Now give me one more kiss." He pressed their lips together and kissed her forehead before he took his suitcase and walked out of the front door.

He'd managed to leave the conference sooner and he was on his way home. He knew that there had been no missions so Natasha should be at home and he couldn't wait to see his girl. He had never been a fan of the political side of this job and he'd shaken enough hands for the time being. He paid the cab driver and left the car. He walked up the stairs of their house thinking that they could maybe go out for milkshakes or something. The weather was nice and warm and a little date sounded lovely.

He unlocked the door and typed in the code into the alarm system. He turned around and _what the fuck?! _A black cat was sitting on the carpet in the hallway hissing at him. Did it get in through the terrace door?

"Liho, Liho? Where are y-" Natasha came into the hallway and she looked at him with wide eyes. The cat immediately ran to her and rubbed its head against her shins. "_Fuck_! What are you already doing here?!"

"I wanted to surprise you!" He pointed at the animal. "Who is that?"

"I found her yesterday while I was out." Natasha picked the cat up and looked sheepishly at him. "I took her to the vet and everything. I named her Liho. Can we keep her?"

"I thought you didn't like animals?"

"This is not an animal, this is Liho!"

Was that supposed to make sense? The cat, _Liho_, purred loudly while Nat was absently stroking her back. "I feel like you two are already thick as thieves. I'm not kicking your cat out."

"_Our_ cat." She corrected and walked over to her. "Come and pet her. Her fur is very soft!" He lifted his hand but the cat started hissing again. "Hey, stop that!" Natasha chided her and let her down. "I guess she thought it was just us girls. She'll learn to love you." She looped her arms around his neck. "Since I love you so much."

"I'm still your number one?" He asked with a grin and pulled her into a deep kiss. "Hi, sweetheart."

"Hey. I missed you." She whispered against his lips, jumping up and wrapping her legs around his waist. "Take me upstairs, Captain."

"Yes, ma'am." He jogged up the stairs and got into the bedroom kicking the door shut so their new roommate wouldn't disturb them. They were necking like teenagers on their bed and he just got Nat out of her top admiring her new bra when a loud whining from outside interrupted them. Nat looked to the door, but he quickly kissed and sucked on her neck. "Ignore it. She'll go away."

"Okay." His wife sighed and pressed her chest against his. The whining and crying got louder and Natasha pushed him off of her and stood up to let the cat into the room. Liho jumped onto the bed and he could swear that the cat was glowering at him. Natasha pulled her shirt back on and sat down on the bed to pet the cat. Liho looked very pleased with herself.

"You know you'll have to share her with me, right? She's my _wife_!" He complained.

Nat laughed and blew him a kiss. "I'll make it up to you when's she napping. Cats sleep like twenty hours a day."

He and Liho coexisted around each other. They both loved Natasha so they tried to tolerate the other one. He wasn't insecure or anything but he did ask his wife from time to time if he was still her number one.

* * *

"You can't hide here forever, Steve." Bucky told him for the hundredth time. "Go home to Natasha. She's calling me all the time. Steve, please. Just talk to your wife. She loves you, you know that. I know you're...I know it's hard but you have to forgive yourself. It wasn't your-"

"Don't. Don't finish that sentence!" He barked and looked finally up. "Don't say it wasn't my fault. It was! I...I almost killed my _wife_, Buck! I can still feel-" He shook his head. He didn't want to think about what had happened last week.

"You weren't yourself." Bucky sat down beside on the bed in his guestroom where Steve had been hiding since he had been released from the Tower. "You weren't in control. We both know that _you_ would _never_ hurt Natasha. You would rather die."

He closed his eyes, feeling disgusted with himself. "It were _my_ hands wrapped around her throat choking the life out of her. It was _me _who almost crushed her windpipe. I almost killed the person I love more than anything in the world. What kind of man does that make me?"

"The same kind as me and Barton." Bucky sighed. "An alien, a _god_, put her spell on you and controlled your mind. You heard Thor, not even his kind could resist her powers. It wasn't your fault what this Lorelei chick did to you."

"I don't wanna talk about it anymore." He lied down on the bed, staring at the ceiling. He felt so guilty and disgusted by himself. This sorceress had infiltrated his mind and made him forget about Natasha. He hadn't remembered his love for her and hadn't even batted an eyelash when Lorelei had told him to kill her when she had found out that they were married. If he closed his eyes, he could still feel her losing her strength underneath his hands. The way she'd looked at him with red eyes, choking out that she loved him and that they were meant for each other. Her faith hadn't faltered while he'd tried to kill her. He'd hesitated enough when she'd said that she was his Natalia and they'd known each other forever that Thor had used that moment to get him off Natasha. That hit had cleared his head and he'd realized what he'd done. Natasha had been heavily breathing, trying to get air into her lungs, and Sam had been by her side putting an oxygen mask over her face.

How could he go home? How could he go back and sleep in the same bed as her? He couldn't make her sleep in the same bed as him! He almost killed her! A little longer, a little more pressure and she would have been _dead_. How could he have forgotten her? What she meant to him? She had _never_ forgotten him in all those years of torture and mind wipes and he'd forgotten her after a run in with an Asgardian. What kind of man did that make him? What kind of _husband_? Natasha was better off without him. He was a _danger_ to her! What if something like this happened again and this time he would kill her?

Natasha should file for divorce. She was better off without him. She would realize that one day.

Natasha showed up at Bucky's door two times asking, almost begging, him to let her see Steve. He heard his best friend comfort her but he didn't let her in. Bucky stopped talking to him after the second time he sent Nat away. Sam and Tony also came by but he refused to see them. He should probably officially leave the team and New York. Natasha could have the house and Liho (not that the cat ever liked him) so she wouldn't be so alone. He should probably leave town soon since it was only a matter of time until Bucky would kick him out.

It was the middle of the night and he couldn't sleep as usual when he heard how the window in his room got opened. He jumped up thinking someone was breaking in but then the scent of his wife was filling his nostrils. Natasha was climbing through the window and closing it when she was in the room.

"You should go."

"No." Natasha said, slipping out of her leather jacket and boots.

"What are you doing?" He asked perplexed and moved away until his back hit the wall.

"I haven't slept in days because my husband is not lying next to me in bed." She came slowly closer. "I'm done with you hiding here."

"No, stay where you are." He tried to press himself into the wall.

"Steve." She said softly, and God he missed her so much. "You're not going to hurt me."

"I almost killed you." He choked out, tears building in his eyes. "You almost died."

"But I didn't, because you pulled through in the end. That wasn't you. I know that you would never hurt me, darling." She was holding her hand out. He shouldn't, but he was itching to touch her. "You weren't in control. I know that feeling better than anyone. You said that what I did for the Red Room wasn't my fault. You said that Bucky isn't responsible for the actions of the Winter Soldier. You didn't blame Clint for what Loki made him do." She took his hand gently and carefully. "It wasn't your fault. But I still forgive you if you need my forgiveness. I forgive you, my love."

"Nat..." If he were a better man, he would have let her go in that moment. He would have broken up with her to protect her. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I...God, please forgive me. I...I never wanted to hurt you. She...she was so strong...I'm so fucking sorry." He fell to his knees and pressed his head into her stomach. God, how could he think that he was strong enough to leave her. He needed her more than anything.

"It's okay. Everything is okay. I forgive you, even though there's nothing to forgive. I love you, Steve. And I know that you love me."

"I do! I love you more than life itself." He mumbled into her shirt and his wife ran her hand through his hair.

"Let's try to get some sleep." She whispered and tugged on his shoulder to make him stand up. "I'm tired and I can't really sleep without you."

"Nat...Are you sure, Natalia?" He shouldn't share the bed with her. But he wanted to. He'd missed her so much. And she was here and she was...she was everything. She nodded and took his hand leading him to the bed. She pulled him onto the bed and made him lie with his back to her. "What-"

"You're the little spoon tonight." She wrapped her arm around his waist and pressed her whole body against his backside. He felt her press a kiss to the back of his neck. "Now go to sleep, darling. We're together and everything is okay."

"Okay." He mumbled and closed his eyes, finally being able to relax. _Everything was okay._

They slept until late afternoon and walked home, their hands intertwined. Liho was staring at him when they walked through the door and then ignoring him. Later when he and Nat were cuddling on the couch Liho came to them and laid down next to his thigh and let him pet her. Everything was okay. They would get through this.


	5. Chapter 5

Liho jumped off her cat tree in the living room and ran out of the room and Steve knew that Natasha was coming home. She had been with Sam and Rhodey for a week in Honduras and he'd missed her terribly. He knew that she could hold her own and that Sam and Rhodey had her back, but he preferred it when he was with her. Or at least Bucky. He knew that his best friend would be looking out for his wife, not that the others weren't but the trust he had in Bucky was different. It hadn't been an easy talk but he'd made Bucky promise him that he would look after Natasha if anything ever happened to him.

He heard Natasha's voice in the hallway and got up to greet her. She was kneeling down to pet Liho who was rubbing herself against Nat's shins. "I missed you too, you little furball." She laughed and stood up. "Hi, Steve."

She had a cut on her forehead and he frowned at that. "Are you hurt anywhere else?"

"No." She came to him and hugged him. "I'm okay. Don't worry."

He nodded and kissed her temple. "Hi." She looked up at him and he cupped her face to really kiss her. He could feel how Natasha relaxed against him and she returned the kiss with a sigh. "Are you hungry?"

"No. But I'd like some tea."

"Coming right up." He took her hand and walked with her into their kitchen to make her one. They sat down at the kitchen table and Liho used that chance to plant herself in Nat's lap. Natasha took a hot shower while he cleaned up and locked the doors. She was already in bed when he came upstairs and immediately wrapped herself around him like an octopus when he joined her in bed. He kissed her forehead and closed his eyes.

"I love you." She mumbled already half asleep.

"I love you." He whispered and ran his hand through her silky hair.

The next morning he woke up with a naked Natasha sitting on top of him with a wide grin on her face, his body immediately reacting to her. Liho was offended that no one was paying attention to her until late noon. He was pretty sure that the cat was giving him the stink eye when he refilled her water and food bowls and he wondered if she knew what he and Natasha had been doing upstairs.

A few weeks later his birthday was already around the corner. Natasha had been right and there had been plans to throw him a big party to celebrate his hundredth birthday but he'd politely turned it down. Tony wanted to throw him one at the Tower with just a couple of people but he knew that he and Tony had different ideas what a just _a couple of people_ meant. He thanked Tony but declined. He really just wanted to be with Nat.

He came home to all his friends sitting around the dining table celebrating his birthday earlier because his wife only told him that they would be out of town on the fourth of July. She looked very pleased with herself and wouldn't give him any clues. The dinner was perfect and all of his friends listened and didn't get him anything (Nat probably reminded them about it and no one was dumb enough to go against her).

The evening before his birthday Natasha disappeared into their walk in closet and came out with two suitcases and told him to carry them to the car. "Where are we going?"

"You'll see." She smiled and said goodbye to Liho who Bucky would check in on as she explained on their way to their SUV that they barely used. She got into the driver's seat and he sat down next to her. "It's just you and me for your birthday, darling. We have a few days until we have to be back in the city."

God, that sounded like heaven. He leaned back into his seat while Natasha started the engine.

She drove up north and they ended up in Montauk where she parked the car in front of a beach house. The next house was at least half a mile away. They were almost alone here. It was perfect.

Nat checked the clock. "Well, it's still a few minutes until your birthday, but this is my gift." She pointed at the house.

"Thank you, sweetheart. A few days just with you are the perfect gift." He took her hand to kiss her.

Nat chuckled. "That's good, but the house is my gift."

"What?!"

"I bought it. For us. For weekend getaways and one day we can live here." She smiled shyly. "This is our future."

He looked at the house and then at his wife. "Nat...I don't know what to say..."

"Just say thank you." She leaned over to kiss him. He whispered a thank you against her lips before he kissed her again. God, his Nat was amazing. The house looked perfect and he suddenly couldn't wait for retirement.

The four days at _their_ beach house were incredible. Natasha baked him a cake for his birthday and they had a BBQ and then watched the fireworks sitting on the roof of their house and later in bed she gave him hundred kisses all over his body. They explored the area and he really liked it here. Natasha had chosen the perfect place for them. He was pleasantly surprised when he saw that half of the clothes in Natasha's suitcase were lingerie that she modeled for him before they made love making sure to christen every room in their house. He was almost sad when they left but this was theirs now and they could come back whenever they wanted.

* * *

Natasha was doing yoga on their terrace with Liho watching her from a outdoor chaise lounge, when he came home after his meeting with Tony. He still couldn't believe what had just happened. He shook his head and watched Natasha do her routine and she grinned up at him through her legs before she picked up her mat and walked into the house.

"Hi, babe." She put the mat away and came over to him. "You wanna join me in the shower?"

"Hi." He pecked her lips and Natasha frowned.

"Okay, what's wrong."

"Tony." He sighed and sat down on the couch. Natasha joined him and threw her legs over his lap. "I met Spider-man today."

"We ran into him before on jobs in New York."

"No. I ran into his alter ego when I came into Tony's lab because he forgot about the meeting. Turns out that Spider-man is interning for him." Natasha raised an eyebrow. "Spider-man is a teenage boy who still goes to high school and he lives with his aunt in Queens. I recognized his voice when he introduced himself."

"Damn, I always thought he was young but not that young! And Tony knew?"

"Yeah, Peter asked him to keep it a secret. Tony thinks that he could do non-lethal missions for us. He's the one that made his new suit. I get that he wants to look out for the kid-"

"But he's still a kid. Every mission could turn lethal." Natasha nodded. "I'm not Tony's biggest fan, but he wouldn't put a child into any real danger."

"I know. It's just a kid should go to school and worry about grades and not _this_."

"Didn't you pick fights daily without any superpowers?"

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah, but that was different. Tony wants the kid to join the team, but I don't think that's a good idea. And his aunt doesn't even know about the whole thing."

"I don't think we should take him on missions that deal with international crises, but helping people in New York could be a good thing for the boy. He gets experience without really putting his life in danger and I'm sure that Tony has an eye on him."

He ran his hand over her calf. "Yeah, you're right. It's just...we're responsible for each other. Everything that happens is on us...And this life...it's dangerous. But you're right. This kid has abilities and he wants to use them to help people. That's a noble thing."

"I bet he was very excited to really meet you." Natasha grinned and sighed when he started to massage her foot.

"Yeah. It was kinda sweet." He chuckled thinking about how Peter almost knocked Tony out because he had been so excited. "He called me Mister Rogers. That was kinda weird."

Nat laughed. "He's just showing some respect for his elders. You _are_ a senior citizen."

He grabbed her to tickle her ribs. "Yeah? You're only six years younger than me, missy! You're a senior citizen, too!" He pushed her top up to _really_ tickle her and Natasha laughed and shrieked trying to get away from him. It was all fun and games until Liho attacked him to protect Natasha. She bit into his biceps with her tiny and _sharp_ teeth, and only slightly pierced his skin but Nat still insisted to clean the wound, even though the serum would prevent any infections, and sank to her knees to make him feel better.

Natasha wiped her mouth off and chided Liho when they came out of the bathroom with him still floating on air.

"Bad kitty!" She picked Liho up and pressed a kiss to her forehead. The cat looked like she knew where Nat's mouth had been just minutes ago because she didn't look very happy. "But thanks for having my back."

* * *

_2019_

Seeing Bucky and Natasha fight was a blur out of red and metal. They were fast and, if it had been a real fight lethal. Bucky was stronger than Nat, but she was faster and used Bucky's own strength against himself. Buck landed on the mat more than he probably liked. Natasha was a formidable fighter and it amazed him every time to see her in action. She was force of nature.

Bucky landed again with a loud thud on the mat. "Okay, I had enough for today."

Natasha laughed and helped Buck up. Steve came closer to the ring and happily accepted the kiss that his wife gave him. "Good job. But Buck, you're dropping your right shoulder too much and your new thigh move needs a bit more finesse, Nat."

"We can practice later." Nat smirked and Bucky groaned in the background. Steve tried his best not to blush. Some of their sparring might had led to another kind of sparring in the past. He just liked being between her thighs.

Nat left to take a shower after they'd gone over the training schedule and he talked with Bucky about Sam's birthday and what they could do for him. Both men pretended to dislike each other but Steve knew that it was just show. His girl had said that they were jealous of each other but they both didn't mind that he spent most of his time with his wife. They agreed that a good burger or steak and drinks sounded perfect.

He realized that Natasha was still in the shower when he came into the locker room and decided to join her. He looked for the room she was using and got out of his gym clothes, took a towel, a change of clothes and opened the door to the shower. Natasha turned around and smiled at him. "I thought you'd never come."

"Still room for one in here?" He grinned and hang his towel up and dropped his clothes next to hers onto the bench. Natasha reached her hand out and he took it letting her pull him under the water stream. Some of Tony's designs were way over the top, but the man knew how to build great showers. The water was covering them both and he took a moment to admire the water running down Natasha's body. She was grinning smugly when he looked back up and pulled him into a kiss. He smiled against her lips and kissed her back.

"Do you want to wash my hair?" She whispered and he nodded. He took her shampoo and let a dollop fall into his palm before rubbing his hands together. He worked the foam into her hair, massaging her scalp and Nat was humming happily. He loved these little moments with her. He gently titled her head back to get all of the product out of her hair and then worked the conditioner in.

Natasha turned to face him when he'd washed everything out of her hair and kissed him again. His hands automatically landed on her bottom and she chuckled into his mouth before softly biting into his lower lip. He pressed Natasha against him hoping that they could-

"Don't even think about it, punk!" Bucky knocked loudly on the door. "This is a public space."

Natasha laughed and told Bucky to get lost. She took his shower gel and rubbed it into his skin. "Later, babe." She promised and continued to wash his body.

They were about to leave the tower when they ran into Pepper in the elevator. "Ah, Steve! Good that I run into you." Pepper said after greeting Nat with a kiss on the cheek. "I have a proposition for you. What do you think about your own art exhibit? We have the space and you could donate the money."

"Um.." He blinked in confusion. "I've never done something like that before."

"Can we get back to you about that?" Natasha asked.

"Of course." Pepper nodded and got out of the elevator before them. "Just call me when you thought about it, Steve."

He nodded and turned to Nat when they were alone. "Do you want to have your own exhibit?"

"I mean it was always my dream, but what if they only come because I'm Captain America?" He admitted in a small voice. He knew that the world cared more about Captain America than Steve Rogers.

Nat took his hand and laced their fingers together. "That's a possibility. But you are truly talented, darling. I wouldn't have framed your sketches and hung them if they weren't good." She smiled softly. "You have a talent and I think people will see that. If anything, critics will probably be especially picky because you are Captain America and they'll think you can't draw. And you don't have to do this. Pepper will understand."

"Yeah...But I think I want it. The money can go to charity and every artist dreams of having their own art show one day."

"Then do it. I'll be your date and I'll kick anyone's ass who says something mean about your work." He smiled down at her and they stepped out of the elevator. "But don't exhibit any of your drawings of me. Especially not the _sexy_ ones. I don't need the New Yorker art scene to know how I look naked. But I do wonder what the world would think if they knew that Captain America has dirty drawings of his wife."

"Shut up." He replied like a real adult, trying not to blush. Some of his drawings of Nat were pretty _explicit _and he hid them in a special portfolio so no one would accidentally stumble upon them. "The world doesn't even know that I have a wife!"

Together they went through his drawings and sketches that evening and he decided to do the art show so he called Pepper after dinner to tell her the news.

Steve put the suit on that Natasha had laid on the bed and went to the art gallery while Natasha was still on the phone with Hill and the Secretary of State about a situation in Colombia. She'd promised to come to the exhibit as soon as possible.

He was nervous. Almost a hundred people with big wallets were invited to look at his work and to hopefully spend a lot of money that would go to the children hospital and the VA in Brooklyn. He went with Pepper and the curator over a few things until the first guests showed up. He shook hands with the rich and famous trying to do small talk with them. They asked him about his work and he tried to answer the questions as good as possible.

He had chosen with Nat the pieces for the exhibition and she'd agreed to exhibit one sketch of her. It was in black and white and only showed her backside so it was almost impossible to tell who it was. He was asked about the picture and the woman but he didn't give anything away. He wanted to play with his wedding ring like he always did when he was nervous but his ring was at home on his nightstand.

"Hey, man." He looked up and saw Bucky coming towards him. He excused himself from the mayor and his wife to greet his friend. "Wow! Look at all these fancy people!" Bucky grinned and gave him a hug. "I'm proud of you."

"Thanks, Buck." He said with warm cheeks. He couldn't really believe that this was happening. He'd never thought that he would have his own exhibit at an art gallery one day.

"Looks like you made it. You're not sick anymore. A renowned artist. And you actually found a girl who wanted to marry you. Sarah would be so proud."

"You think?" God, he wished his ma was here to see all of this.

"Of course. Well, she probably wouldn't be happy that you didn't marry a catholic girl. " Bucky laughed. "Speaking of her." He pointed at the entrance and Natasha was just walking through the door. God, she looked spectacular in her black dress that clung to her body nicely and accentuated her beauty. Her hair was in an elegant knot on top of her head and she wore darker eye make up as usual that made her eyes look even greener. She tottered on her stilettos towards him after she'd given her coat to the staff. "Don't let that jaw of yours hit the floor!"

He glared at his friend before he focused back on his wife. She came with a bright smile towards him. He almost pulled her into his arms to kiss her but he did remember that they were in public and that all eyes were on him tonight. She greeted him with a kiss on the cheek and then did the same with Bucky.

"Hi, boys."

"Hi." He whispered softly. "You look amazing."

Bucky snickered. "Dude, you're not being obvious at all."

Natasha laughed a little and asked if there was some place where they had some privacy. He led her to some kind of storage room and closed the door behind him. "Hi, darling." Natasha breathed out and then grabbed the collar of his blazer to kiss him. She kissed him deeply and he wrapped his arms around her. "I'm so proud of you."

"Thank you." He whispered and kissed her again. "I was really nervous."

"And now you're not?" She asked softly and rubbed a comforting hand over his bicep.

"Well, you're here now."

"Dork." She blushed a little and kissed the grin of his face. "Good thing I'm wearing kissproof lipstick today." She chuckled and kissed him again. "Now sell your work to collect money for kids and veterans and you might get lucky tonight." She bit her lip and he gulped. He didn't think that she would ever lose to have that affect on him. "I might have brought a new set of lingerie and maybe I'm already wearing it."

And with that she left the room and he tried to calm down. He couldn't just leave his own art show after half an hour because he wanted to see his wife in her new lingerie.

He heard people addressing Natasha as Miss _Romanoff_ and it felt so wrong. She was Natasha _Rogers,_ but only a handful of people knew that. They didn't want the public to know about their marriage because if the world knew then their enemies would know and would use it against them. Like Lorelei had done. He knew that Hydra would use Natasha to get to him if they knew that she was his wife. His best girl, his whole fucking world. She smiled at him every time their gazes met while she charmed the guests into biding for his work.

Sam and Rhodey arrived shortly after Nat and congratulated him on his work. Tony came fashionably late which earned him a from scowl from Pepper and even Hill showed up much to Sam's joy. He figured that they would leave together and that their _thing_ was currently on again.

It was after midnight when Pepper came to the table where he was talking to Rhodey and Nat with the latter rubbing her foot against his calf from time to time which make him grab his bourbon tighter.

"Congratulations, Steve." Pepper announced. "It was a great success. Everything is sold!"

"What?" He blinked at the woman and Nat slipped her hand into his.

"Yep. Especially the drawing of Natasha was very popular. Not that the buyer knows that it's her. It made the most."

"How much did we collect tonight?" Nat asked.

Pepper smiled warmly. "Almost two million dollars."

"What?!" He almost shrieked and Rhodey choked on his scotch.

"We made 1.92 millions dollars. Congratulations, Steve. You'll help a lot of people with that money."

"I'm so proud of you, darling." Natasha beamed brightly at him. "You are definitely getting lucky tonight. _Multiple_ times."

"I think that is our cue to leave." Rhodey laughed and led Pepper away from the table.

Holy shit! He'd never thought that they would get _that much_ money. They said goodbye to their friends and Happy drove them home. Nat told him to sit on their bed when she was standing a few feet away from him. She let her dress fall to the floor and stepped out of it. Yeah, that was _really_ nice lingerie.

"Okay, wow." He panted hours later when the sun was already coming up. "I think I'll sell my work regularly if this will happen every time."

Natasha laughed and hit his chest. "I thought you weren't getting any younger!" She grinned and pressed a kiss to his shoulder. "I'm very proud of you. Your work is amazing and it's worth every penny that it made last night."

"You think so? They didn't just pay so much because I'm, well, Captain America?"

"No." Her small and soft hand cupped his cheek. "No, I eavesdropped on their conversations. They were really surprised that you're such a talented artist. They paid because the paintings and sketches are incredible and not because you're a national icon." She pecked his lips. "I heard one artsy guy say that the woman in the black and white sketch must mean a lot to the artist. He said he could practically feel the love and devotion."

He smiled and kissed her again. "You mean everything to me. You always have and you always will, sweetheart." Natasha smiled and rested her forehead against his. "Now let's try to get some sleep before Liho kicks us out of bed."

* * *

"Uncle Steve, can you lift an elephant?" Lila asked him over breakfast. They were at the farm for Laura's birthday and he was still amazed that they actually managed to get the weekend off to visit Nat's family since the last weeks had been very hectic with work.

He looked over to his wife who was grinning into her coffee mug. "Uh, I don't know. Can't say I've tried it yet."

"Cooper said you can't, but I think you can!" The teenager shot his little sister a death glare.

"If I ever come into that situation, I'll let you know, okay?" He asked Lila who nodded. He could lift motor cycles and cars...How much did an elephant weigh?

Breakfast was over soon and Natasha offered to put Nate down for a nap. She put the toddler on her hip and went with him upstairs. Lila and Cooper followed their dad outside to feed the animals. So only he and Laura were left to clean up the breakfast table.

"I'm really glad you could make it." Laura smiled warmly. "It's been so long since you two were here."

Steve nodded. "Yeah, we're happy, too." He considered the Bartons his family now as well. And he loved it that the kids were calling him Uncle Steve since his wedding to Nat.

"You know I've been wondering about something for a while now. Well, actually for years." Laura said while she handed him dishes for the dishwasher.

"Okay?"

"Did you know Natasha from before? Well, did you two each other back in the day?"

He almost dropped the plate she'd handed him. "What?!"

"You were both born around the same time and...well, Natasha never dated anyone and then you show up and months later Clint tells me that Natasha has a boyfriend. I was pretty surprised by that. Don't get me wrong, you two are perfect together but it was so sudden."

"Uh-"

"It was love at first sight." Natasha was suddenly standing in the kitchen. "We looked at each other and that was it. It was like I had to wait seventy years to meet the right partner." She smirked a little. She was technically telling the truth. It had been love at first sight. But in 1944 and not 2012. And she did had to wait seventy years for him.

Laura smiled, but she didn't look completely convinced. "I wish I could say it was the same with Clint. It was probably his horrible hair cut." She laughed. "Nate asleep?"

Natasha nodded and Laura left the kitchen to check on her husband and kids. Natasha came to him and wrapped her arms around his waist and looked up at him with her chin on his chest. "I love Laura, but I don't want anyone to know about that."

He smiled down at her. "I know. Bucky knows, though."

"Yeah, because he was there the night we met." She chuckled darkly. "I promised him intense pain if he'd ever told anyone about that."

He rolled his eyes fondly at her and pecked her lips. "My hero." He joked and Natasha laughed before she pressed their lips together again. "Have you ever been on a tractor?"

"No."

She took his hand and led him out of the kitchen. "Then let's burrow Clint's and have a little tour."

Clint explained everything to him and with Nat in his lap they drove off the property and explored the area together. It was really beautiful where the Bartons lived and he enjoyed to do this little trip with his wife. Driving with Nat in his lap was probably not the safest way but he had sharp reflexes and the tractor wasn't that fast. They stopped at an field and Natasha suddenly had a blanket in her hand that she laid down on the grass. No one was here and they ended up making love in broad daylight much to Natasha's amusement.

She was laughing when they got back into their clothes. "What?" He asked her with a grin.

"Nothing." She shook her head with a big smile on her face. "You never cease to amaze me, darling."

"Oh, please!" He pulled her against him and played with the hem of her sundress. "You planned this whole thing. We both know that I can't resist you in those dresses."

Natasha grinned a pleased little smile and pecked his lips. "You know me so well, my darling." She purred and looped her arms around his neck. He lifted her up by his hands on her waist to even out the height difference. "We have to get back soon for Laura's party." She reminded him but kissed him with so much passion that it knocked the air out of his lungs."

"I love you, Natalia."

She smiled softly. "And I love you, Steve Rogers."

* * *

Natasha's birthday was around the corner and Steve was trying to come up with the perfect way to celebrate it. He knew that just like him she didn't like big parties so he objected to Pepper's idea to throw Nat a party at the tower. Maybe they could take a short trip up north to the beach house? It was cold since it was November but they could cuddle in front of the fireplace. Or maybe he could book a hotel room here in New York so Nat could get pampered with massages and stuff like that. He wanted to surprise her but he wasn't really good at it.

Natasha was on the couch with Liho in her lap watching the news when he came home. He sat down next to his wife and she snuggled against his chest. "So, your birthday is next week."

"Don't remind me." She sighed. "I'm turning 95. Only five years left until I'm hundred!"

"Hey, I'm 101!"

Nat laughed and pinched his thigh. "Well, you're a fossil!"

"And you're not?" He snorted. "Do you want to do anything special?"

"No. If we don't have to work then I just wanna stay home." She looked up at him. "Maybe you can make me your ma's roast?"

"Of course. There might be even a cake in it for you."

Maybe they jinxed it because Natasha had to leave the country two days before her birthday for a job and it didn't look like she would make it back in time. He tried to find a way to get to her but she was in the middle of an extraction of a former SHIELD agent and he would only jeopardize the whole operation. He knew that this was out of his hands and there wasn't anything that he could do, but he still felt like a failure. Nat would most likely not be able to celebrate her birthday and he felt like it was his job as her husband to make sure that she could.

Jarvis sent him a text that Nat's mission had been a success and Steve got an idea and texted the AI.

He prayed that he reached the hotel suite before Natasha. He wanted to be there before her to have everything done when she arrived in Paris. New York was closer to France than Vietnam so hopefully she wasn't there yet. And she wasn't when he got into hotel suite and checked the kitchenette out. It was small but everything he needed was there. He started to make his ma's roast and he'd just put it in the oven when then door opened.

"Hi." Natasha smiled.

"Happy birthday." He ran to her and lifted her up. "Happy birthday to the greatest person ever born."

She smiled and kissed him. "Thank you. And thank you for this. I think my birthday would have been over if I'd landed in New York."

"Well, we still have three hours and the roast is done in one."

Natasha raised an eyebrow and ran her nails over his clothed chest. "What are we gonna do with that hour?"

After dinner they sat down on their bed with view of the Eiffel Tower. Natasha snuggled against his chest and sipped on her champagne. "That was a great birthday."

"Yeah? Even though it were only three hours?"

Natasha looked up at him. "Even just one minute with you is the perfect birthday."

He kissed her softly. "Tomorrow we're going sightseeing and then I'm taking my girl on a date."

"Sounds lovely." She hummed and he realized that she was tired. He took her glass and she laid down on the mattress. He joined her after he put their glasses away and pulled her against his chest. He could give her her new necklace tomorrow.

* * *

_2020_

Liho greeted him at the door with a bump of her little head against his shin when he came home. He'd spent the last days with a small team on a mission in Syria and was now back in Brooklyn. Natasha had been in DC for a conference and he hoped that she was already back.

"Natasha?"

"Bathroom!" She shouted back and after scratching Liho under her shin, he hung his shield on the wall and jogged upstairs to see his wife. He opened the bathroom door and found Natasha sitting in the bathtub. She'd lit candles and two wine glasses were on the edge of the tub.

"Hi, darling!" She smiled and a strain of her hair fell out of the knot on top of her head. "A litte birdie told me that you were back. Get naked and in the tub!"

"Yes, ma'am!" He saluted her and got out of his clothes and shoes. Natasha leaned forward and he sat down behind her with Nat leaning against his chest. "What a nice surprise!"

Natasha cocked her head to look up at him. "I know, right." She puckered her lips and he leaned down to kiss her. "I'm glad you're finally home."

"I was only gone for five days." He joked, even though he had missed her too.

"Felt like a lifetime." She sighed and handed him a glass of wine. "I was thinking that we'll enjoy this bath and then watch a movie?"

"Sounds perfect." He agreed and took a sip from his wine.

He slipped his wedding ring back on after their bath while Natasha chose a film. The pizza arrived when he came downstairs and the delivery guy's eyes went huge when Nat opened the door only in her silk robe. Steve glared at him and the boy took the money and left. Halfway into the movie he turned the TV off because his wife had fallen asleep and he carried her into their bedroom. He checked if everything was locked before he joined Natasha. God, he was the luckiest guy in the world that he got to sleep next to her every night.

"Building's empty, Cap!" Sam informed him over the comms. The team was in Sokovia raiding a Hydra base and they'd found human experiments. They got the people out of the building.

"Has anyone eyes on Rumlow?" As it turned out Rumlow was also Hydra and had been in Europe since Fury had fired him from SHIELD years ago.

"No."

"Could he be inside? Gone back?"

"I'll send Redwing to check, Cap." There was a pause while he waited for Sam's response. "Yeah, looks like he's in there. Wait...I think Natasha is also still in the building."

Steve pressed on his ear pierce. "Nat? Rumlow is inside. Be careful. Do not engage until you get further instructions."

"_Rogers_ that." Nat quipped back and he grinned to himself. His wife, the scary and lethal Black Widow, was just a huge dork.

He wanted to say something but then he heard a loud explosion. He turned around and saw how the building was crashing down. God, Natasha! He touched his ear piece. "Nat? Natasha? Do you copy? Nat? Natalia, answer me!"

Nothing. Oh God, he wanted to throw up. The whole building was gone. Just debris and ashes. Oh God! He ran as fast as he could to the giant rubble heap and threw wreckage over his shoulder to find a way in. She was still alive, he just had to get her out of there.

"Nat!"

He absently noticed his team members doing the same with Rhodey and Sam flying above them probably scanning the area to find Natasha. His hands were bleeding but he didn't care. He wouldn't stop until he'd found Natasha. He couldn't think any further. If she...No, she was okay. She had to be. He was too weak to live without her. He needed her more than anything.

"I think I found her!" Rhodey announced.

"Where?" He shouted back and looked up.

Rhodey pointed to the other side of the rubble pile. "Over there. I think she's in some kind of elevator? Or metal locker?"

He ran to the location and started to dig. Bucky rushed to his side to help him. He was glad that his best friend wasn't saying anything. They stopped when they found a broken freezer with a dent. He ripped the lid out of its angles and there she was. Natasha must have jumped into the freezer when she'd heard the explosion to protect herself from the blast. She was unconscious but she still had a pulse. He sighed in relief and Bucky helped him get her out of the freezer.

"Wait!"

"What?"

Bucky pointed at the bottom of the freezer. "There's blood. She's bleeding!"

_Fuck!_ He carefully shoved his hand into the freezer and touched something wet on her left side. Something must have stabbed her but he didn't know what it was because there was nothing in the freezer. "Okay, we'll get her out on three." He said to Bucky who nodded. "One, two, three."

They lifted her out of the freezer and he tried to push any thoughts about how it resembled a coffin out of his mind. The quinjet was already there when he carried Natasha down the rubble pile. He placed her gently on the gurney and let Sam push him to the side so he could get to work. He cut her cat suit open and flushed the wound out. It look like it was caused by a knife. Not some pipe. Sam stapled her wound and then turned around to face him.

"She should be okay until we land at the nearest hospital. She needs to get into an OR asap. I think her lung got hit."

Steve nodded and Rhodey announced that they would be in forty minutes in Vienna. He took Nat's lifeless hand and laced their fingers together. She would be okay. She had to be!

Natasha had been in the OR for over two hours now and those two hours were the longest of his life. The whole team was waiting with him for an update on Nat and Steve was out of his mind. Nat was strong, so strong, but she had lost so much blood and she was so tiny...

"Herr -Mister Rogers?" A doctor in scrubs came into the waiting room and looked around. "Which one of you is Miss Rogers' husband?"

"I am!" He jumped up and ran to the doctor. "Is she okay? Can I see her?"

The doctor took a step back because Steve hadn't realized that he was crowding her. "She's in the recovery room. We'll be bringing her soon to a private hospital room. She's stable. We managed to close the hole in her left lung and she should make a full recovery. She's lucky that she's enhanced or she would have bled to death. You can see her soon." The doctor gave him a nod and then left.

Oh thank God! She would be okay. He sighed in relief and turned around to see the others looking relieved as well. Bucky came over to give him a hug. "Like some building could kill Natasha! You should change before you see her." He pointed to the chairs behind them. "I took your duffel bag with me."

He found an empty room to change in and then immediately went to Natasha's room. She was still unconscious but her face wasn't so pale anymore. He dragged a chair to her bed and sat down next to her, never keeping his eyes off of her. He had been very close to losing her and that...just scared him. He loved her so much and living without her was impossible. He would have never adapted or found his place in this new world without her. Only because of his love for her he'd found his way. Natasha was his past, his present and his future. She was his whole world and without her...He would be so lost. But she was still here. She was alive and she would be completely healthy again. He was so thankful for that. Without her nothing would make sense. He carefully took her hand and listened to her heartbeat that echoed through the room. She was okay.

He didn't know how long he'd watched her when her eye lids finally started to flutter and she blinked her eyes open.

"Hey, sweetheart." He murmured softly. "You're in a hospital. Everything's okay."

"What-" She licked her dry lips and he quickly grabbed the glass of water from the nightstand and held the straw against her lips. She almost emptied the whole glass. "Thank you."

"How do you feel?"

"Been better. Rumlow attacked me and managed to get a a hit on me. Then he suddenly ran away and I tried to follow him but the wound slowed me down. I heard the explosion and jumped into a broken freezer." She brushed her thumb over his hand. "Did I scare you much?"

"I was losing my mind, Nat. I can't live without you. I was so fucking terrified that I would lose you." He whispered and cupped her face with his free hand. "You are everything to me."

"I love you." She whispered back. "Kiss me."

He leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to her lips. "I'm so fucking happy that you're okay. We're taking a vacation once you're better. Just you and me at our beach house."

Natasha smiled. "That sounds lovely. We should probably take Liho with us, though."

"Sure. We'll get her cat sunglasses." He joked and Natasha laughed but it soon turned into a cough. "But first you have to fully recover, sweetheart."

"Oh yes, for all the thank-god-Nat-is-still-alive-sex!" Natasha grinned and he snorted. Yeah, she was going to be just fine. "Do you want to join me in here?"

"I shouldn't!" He objected, but she was already moving to the side.

"Please, I sleep better with you right next to me. Just don't touch my left side and we'll be fine." She pouted a little bit and he sighed, taking of his shoes. He carefully got into the bed on her right side. "Thank you."

"Now sleep." He pressed a kiss to her temple. "I love you so much, Natalia."

Her eyes were already closed, but she grabbed his hand. "I love you, too. Only you."


	6. Chapter 6

_Natasha has to deal with the fact that the whole world loves and wants her Steve_

* * *

Having Steve back was the greatest thing that had ever happened to Natasha. She would never forget the moment Coulson had told her that SHIELD had found Captain America and that he was_ still alive_. She had been _truly_ happy for the first time in almost seventy years when she had seen Steve walking down that ramp of the quinjet.

She kept the fact that she loved Captain America a secret for seventy years and they now kept their relationship a secret as well. She knew that Clint was aware that something was going on between her and Steve but he kept quiet about it. He would let her tell him about Steve when she was ready. Having Steve back in her life and him still loving her was so important and sacred that she didn't want anyone to know about it. Especially not the public. The world was going crazy about Captain America still being alive and they all wanted a piece of him, but they would never get to know this about him. They would never find out that he already had a girlfriend who he met in 1944 at a bar in London. He was hers and she was his.

It still amazed her that most civilians didn't recognize them when they were out in public but it made it so much easier to go out with Steve. To show him everything that changed in the last decades. That they could walk hand in hand down a street and no one looked at them twice. They just looked like any other couple in love.

But it was different when they were on official Avenger business and kept a distance between each other. Men were afraid of her so they didn't approach her, but Steve was always surrounded by women. They basically threw themselves at him, not trying to hide their interest. Steve was polite but she could see how uncomfortable he was. He always apologized profoundly when they were alone, telling her that she was his best and only girl. She knew that she had no reason to be jealous, that Steve loved her and would never cheat but it still bothered her.

The media soon started to call him the most eligible bachelor in the world (something that definitely hurt Stark's ego) and wondered when he would meet someone. Captain America fan clubs were founded where women were gushing online about Steve, picturing him as the perfect boyfriend (which he was). Female celebrities showed interest in him and tried to score dates with him. Gossip sites had polls where reader could choose which actress or singer was the best fit for Captain America. All those things shouldn't bother her, but they did. She knew that they would never click on her name if it would show up in an online poll. No one would want someone like her dating America's golden son. Someone as good and pure as Steve loving her was sometimes even a surprise to her. She had done so much wrong in her life and yet she had gotten a second chance with the sweet boy from the bar.

It gotten worse when Steve officially started to work for SHIELD and they both moved to DC. She was so incredibly happy that she finally lived with the love of her life in a house and that she slept in his arms every night, but she _hated_ the attention he got the Triskelion. She definitely didn't want anyone there to know that they lived together and that she was hoping that Steve would propose soon (they were both from a different time and she wanted _him_ to ask _her_) so she treated Steve like any other agent at work. She was professional but kept her distance to him. She didn't want to start any rumors going around why she was nicer to Captain Rogers than to anyone else. People still thought that she was hooking up with Clint and she had only let them believe that to help protect his family.

Here at SHIELD everyone knew who he was and the female agents were all crushing on him. She caught Hill staring at his ass more than once, _May_ smiled at Steve when she ran into him at the Triskelion and especially the junior agents couldn't contain their excitement when they were graced by Captain America's presence.

The audience when Steve was working out or sparing was almost completely female. Look, she got it, okay? Steve looked like a Greek god and had a heart of gold. She could understand why they were all crushing on him, she'd fallen in love with him the moment he'd walked into that bar. Seeing him all sweaty and defeating his sparing partner within minutes did things to her as well and she had dragged Steve into an empty room after training more than once. But she was his girlfriend so it was okay. He was hers and those women lusting after him bothered her! They just wanted Captain America and not Steve. She thought about the photo she had stolen on her first mission in New York that showed Steve before the serum, she highly doubted those women would still want him if he still looked like that. Natasha would always want him, she didn't care how he looked. She looked him for_ who_ he was and not for his looks. She loved him so much, more than she ever thought she could love someone.

Steve had a meeting with Fury and Secretary Pierce at the Triskelion that she was not needed for so she got home before him today. She wanted to use his absence to cook him something so they could have a date night at home. They could take a nice bath after dinner or she wasn't opposed to go straight to bed for a little bit of fun. She probably shouldn't love the fact so much that she was the only one who'd ever had the pleasure to share a bed with him. She would be the only one he would ever experience this with. Those women could lust after him all they wanted, they would never actually take him to bed.

She was in the kitchen roasting vegetables when Steve came home. He immediately came to her and wrapped his strong arms around her. Steve gave her a kind of safety that only he could give her and it had nothing to do with the fact that he was so much stronger than anyone else. No, he made her feel secure. She had been so lost without him until he finally had come back to her.

"Hey." She mumbled into his chest and she felt Steve press a kiss on top of her head.

"Hi, sweetheart."

She looked up at him and he lowered his head to give her a sweet kiss, but she could feel that something was bothering him. He was a little bit tense. "What's wrong, darling?"

He sighed and moved to lean against the kitchen counter. "I ran into Agent Carter after the meeting. She asked me out. Just for coffee but her intentions were clear."

She had noticed before that Carter was into Steve. She just didn't think she'd try to make a move. Great, another blonde Barbie who was after her man. "What did you say?"

"I said no, of course. Told her that I'm not looking for a relationship." He shook his head. "She implied that she would also be okay with just sex. Not that's wrong or anything, but not with me!"

God, he was so cute. She pecked his lips quickly and Steve smiled a little. "I can't blame her for wanting a piece of _this_." She pointed at him. "I mean you're incredible in bed." Steve blushed and she grinned. "Let her think that she could have you one day. But Talking to her would probably complicate things."

"Maybe if people knew that I'm with someone than-"

"They'll want to know who that someone is. Just tell them that you keep work and your private life strictly separated. Use your Captain America voice and act disappointed that they would even think that you would date a co-worker."

She got back to roasting the vegetables and Steve moved behind to press kisses on her neck after he pushed her hair out of the way. "But I am dating my second in command. You expect me to lie?" He quipped while his hands landed on her waist.

"Yes. Or your second in command stops letting you into her pants."

He chuckled against her skin. "Well, in that case..."

* * *

There were sometimes stories about women who claimed that they had been with Steve, whether it was in a relationship or just sex. She wondered if those women even really existed or if the tabloids just made them up to sell their magazines. She knew those stories were bullshit and most people didn't buy into it. She didn't tell Steve about it so she had no idea if he knew about this. She really hoped he did't because it would only hurt him. But people still wondered if Captain America was truly single or if he had someone in his life. Some people on the internet even speculated that Natasha was his secret girlfriend (she was actually his_ wife_ now!) but most argued in the comments that Captain America would never be with someone like her. No, he would date an all American girl who was sweet and innocent according to them. Some mothers even asked online if there was a way to contact him so he could meet their daughters. Natasha rolled her eyes at them and closed her laptop. She knew that the public would have a problem if they knew that she was Captain America's wife. She also knew that Steve didn't care about her past, but she did care about his reputation. He was the best man she had ever met and she didn't want people to think less of him because of who he'd married.

Steve got invited to award shows and parties of pretty much every single female celebrity. Of course he never went to any of those. She personally was glad that the world didn't know that she and Steve were married. Their friends knew and that was enough. Maybe it was silly, but she was glad that a handful of people knew that she was his wife. Not it wasn't just the dream she'd had for seventy years but actually reality now. He was her husband and he loved her. Only her. She didn't want anyone else to know about their marriage. The world already had so much of Steve, they knew so much about his past that it wasn't fair if they had this of him, too.

All of the Avengers were invited to the Inaugural ball for President Ellis' second term and a part of her wanted to go as Steve's official date. She wanted to wear the most gorgeous dress she could find and show the world that Steve Rogers was hers. She wanted them to wear their wedding bands so everyone would know that they were a couple. But then they would lose the last little piece of privacy and their enemies would know their weaknesses. She wasn't proud of it, but if she had to choose between saving the world or Steve -she would choose her husband in a heartbeat. She had already lost him once, she couldn't go through that again. Once she had found out that her sweet Steve had been actually Captain America and died after he hadn't shown up at the bar...God, that pain had been...There were no words to describe it.

The whole team would go together and she was sure that she would manage to get a few dances with her husband. She would just have to behave herself because Steve in a tuxedo made her want to rip him out of it to have her wicked way with him. Steve seemed to be happy that they would get to be together even though they had to be careful so no one would realize that they were in love.

She found the perfect dress on a shopping trip with Pepper and couldn't wait to see Steve's reaction when he would see her in it. Tony rented the upper floors of a hotel near the White House so the whole team had privacy. She managed to snatch the honeymoon suite from Stark and Pepper with the explanation that she and Steve were actually married unlike the other couple, though she could see a wedding in the near future. She was just doing the last touches on her hair and make up before she stepped out of the bathroom into the bedroom where Steve was fighting with his bow tie.

"You need help, darling?"

"Ugh, yeah!" Steve whined and turned around and she was surprised that his jaw didn't hit the floor. "Nat-wow, you look amazing."

She twirled around herself. "You think?"

Steve came over to her. "Yes. You are always beautiful, but this dress looks stunning on you. And I think it will look great on the hotel room floor later." He winked and brushed his finger over her clavicle.

"Dork." She grinned and helped him with his bow tie. It was kind of adorable that Captain America jumped out of planes without a parachute but had to admit defeat against an innocent box tie.

"Thanks, sweetheart. I kinda wish we could just stay here. The living room of this suite is big enough for ballroom dances." He gave her a soft kiss. "I know why we keep us a secret and I completely agree, but I do wish I could walk in there with you and everyone would know that you're mine. That this gorgeous and brilliant girl married me."

"I know what you mean." She sighed and cupped his face. "But it's better like this. We have to protect this. Nothing is more important than your marriage. We already gave the world so much of us."

He nodded. "I know. I love you."

"I love you, too."

She danced with every member of the team and she had to admit that Tony was a good dancer, but of course nothing could compare to dancing with her husband. They were discreet and only danced twice but it was like only the two of them existed on the dance floor. Steve whispered sweet nothings to her that made her smile and she hoped that her eyes showed him how much she loved him.

She was currently dancing with Bucky and she wondered if he always had been such a great dancer of if Hydra had thought that it was a necessary skill set. They moved effortlessly over the dance floor when Bucky raised his eyebrow. "Oh oh. Looks like the First Daughter is hitting on your husband."

Her head snapped into the direction Bucky was looking and he was right. Liz Ellis was definitely flirting with Steve. It looked like she was trying to get him to dance with her, but he had only danced with Natasha and Pepper tonight. She gritted her teeth, now President Ellis joined them and it looked like he was trying to get Steve to dance with his daughter. Well, what dad wouldn't want his daughter to date Captain America? Steve looked defeated and nodded which delighted Liz to no end. She was beaming brightly when Steve led her onto the dance floor. Natasha almost laughed at the fact that the woman thought that she had a shot with him. But Captain America would go home with Natasha tonight. He would come with her, make love to her and then pull her against his chest so she could sleep in his safe embrace because she was his _wife_. Steve looked slightly annoyed but he was good at covering it while the First Daughter was talking her head off.

"I don't think killing the First Daughter at the Inaugural ball would be good press for the Avengers." Bucky chuckled before he twirled her.

"What?"

"You look like you want to murder her."

"I don't-" Bucky gave her a pointed look. Okay, maybe he was right. The First Daughter was definitely too touchy for her liking. It would probably the story of the year if the First Daughter would start dating Captain America. That would be the most American thing since Apple Pie or baseball. Maybe killing her would be a bit too much, but Natasha would at least love to punch her in the boob or something.

Steve accompanied Liz Ellis back to her table where she tried to get him to sit with her. Natasha was already on her way, when Pepper appeared out of nowhere next to Steve and led him away with an excusing smile. She wondered if the First Daughter realized that she had been _this_ close to getting her ass kicked.

Steve wasn't there when she woke up the next morning and she turned the TV on until he would come back. The most discussed topic was Captain America and the First Daughter dancing and the press was having a field day with it. Photos from yesterday were analyzed by body language "experts" and they were all positive that there was a lot of chemistry between them. Some were already calling them the most spectacular couple since the Kennedys. She wondered what the media would say if they knew that he was actually married to Natasha Romanoff. She doubted that the coverage would be very positive. She was maybe an Avenger, but the public still had a problem with her which she could understand given her bloody past. She heard the door open and turned off the TV. Steve came into the bedroom with a smile on his face and a paper bag in his hands.

"Remember that little cafe we used to go to when we lived in DC?"

"Clarisse's?"

"I went there and got you your chocolate croissants." He looked very proud of himself and she smiled warmly at her dorky husband. Who cared if some woman had hit on him yesterday? The First Daughter would never get to spend the night with Steve and then have him bring her chocolate croissants from her favorite bakery in town. No, he only did that for her.

* * *

The Avengers had to work with the CIA together since they were after the same people and they sent Agents Ross and Carter. She hadn't seen Sharon since the fall of SHIELD and was glad about it. She had known that she was working for the CIA and thought that their paths wouldn't cross again. Yet here was Sharon making heart eyes at Steve. She was staying close to Steve during the debriefing, throwing her hair over her shoulder and subtly trying to show him her cleavage. It was kind of pathetic. Steve had turned her down over three years so, why did she think he'd changed his mind by now?

She touched his arms while they were speaking and during the mission she tried to impress him which almost ended with the head of the Hydra splinter group getting away if Natasha and Bucky didn't manage to prohibit that. Sharon seemed to be embarrassed but it didn't stop her from hitting on Steve who was really uncomfortable by now. She knew that he and Sharon's great aunt had been good friends so that probably alone freaked him out, let alone the fact that he was a married man.

Natasha had enough when she watched Sharon trying to give Steve her hotel key and Steve kept pushing her hand away, telling her that he wasn't interested in her. She stormed over and threw all caution out of the window. Sharon was a former SHIELD agent and now CIA, she knew what Natasha would do to her if she ever told anyone about what Natasha was about to tell her.

She yanked Sharon back, rage cursing through her veins. She wasn't even jealous anymore, she was mad that Carter didn't accept Steve's lack of interest in her but kept pushing him. Sharon looked at her with a mix between anger and fear.

"I would really appreciate it if you stop hitting on my _husband_! Or we're gonna have a problem, Carter!"

Sharon's eyes widened in surprise. "What? He's your...Huh? I had no idea. I wouldn't have...if i had known..." She stuttered out, clearly terrified of her. _Good_.

"And even if he wasn't married, you should have accepted his no!"

"I thought he was just shy! Aunt Peggy always said that he was so flustered when a woman showed interest in him."

Steve raised an eyebrow. "There's a difference between being flustered and _uncomfortable_. I was trying to be polite out of respect for Peggy but you clearly crossed a line!"

"I'm sorry. It won't happen again." She mumbled and quickly left the room.

Steve smiled down at her and she couldn't help but smile back. All that anger was gone now. "Thanks for coming to my rescue."

"You're sometimes too nice for your own good, darling." She kissed the corner of his mouth. "What do you say if we go home and I let you draw on my back?"

He chuckled. "That sounds wonderful. Let's just hope that Liho doesn't run away with the brush in her mouth again."


	7. Chapter 7

_Natasha's seventy years without Steve_

* * *

_London, September 1945_

It hadn't been easy, but Natalia finally gotten the Red Room off her trail and she was _free_. She knew that they wouldn't find her and she could start her new life. Her new life with_ Steve_.

She had always thought that love was for children, but then this beautiful man had walked into the bar and she had been immediately smitten. She hadn't been able to take her eyes off of him and she had felt so comfortable during their conversation. She had known that it had been risky to let him walk her home, to let a stranger (an _American_ stranger) know where she was staying, but she had felt it deep in her bones that she could trust him. Natalia had been with a lot of men, because of her job and sometimes just out of boredom, but none of them could ever compare to Steve. Yes, he had been inexperienced, but it still had been perfect. For the first time in her life a man had _made love_ to her and she wanted more of that. She wanted a life with him and that was why she had come back to the bar.

The war was finally over and she and Steve could run away together. He would take her to America and they would be together. She was sure that she had enough money saved so that they could buy a house in Brooklyn. She could be a dancer and Steve could be an artist if he wanted to. She smiled to herself, wondering how long it would take until he would propose to her. She'd never thought that was something that she would want, but the idea of being his wife was more than appealing to her. He was a kind and wonderful man, a marriage to him wouldn't cost her her new freedom. No, he was different than those man who just wanted someone to cook them dinner and give them children.

Maybe the Americans could reverse what the Red Room had done to her and she could get pregnant after all. She would love to be the mother of his children.

She turned around the street corner and the bar came into her view. It was still closed and Steve was nowhere to be seen. She wasn't worried about that though, she knew that it could take some time until he would show up. Who knew where he had been when Japan had surrendered.

She walked to the cafe near by where she could perfectly watch the bar. She ordered a coffee and a piece of cake, waiting for Steve to show up. The first thing she would tell him was that she loved him. She loved him and she knew that he had fallen in love with her as well. She had seen it in his eyes during their night together. And then she would take him to the hotel where she had book a suite for them so they could talk about their future. And then they would make love. She couldn't help but smile. She was so happy and excited that her life with him was _finally_ about to start.

Steve didn't show up that day. But it didn't matter. She would come back the next day.

He didn't show up the next day. And the day after that. And the day after that.

She knew what it meant, but she didn't want to believe that. No, it couldn't be. He couldn't be...She couldn't even think about that.

Natalia waited a whole week. She came to the bar everyday, waiting for him for hours, but he didn't come. She walked back to her hotel room, staring at the bed where she had pictured her and Steve loving each other. The first tears were falling down her face. Steve was_ dead_. She just knew that he was. She had fallen in love and her love had died.

How could she have believed that she would get to run away with the man of her dreams? Had she really been so stupid to believe that her destiny would be to be the wife of an American? To dance and come home to a man who loved her and was good to her? Of course she didn't get to have such a life. She was a weapon and not a real person, and Steve had paid the price.

She broke down crying. She cried for Steve and how his life had ended way too soon. She cried for the life that they could have had together. And she cried for herself. The Red Room had done terrible things to her to make her stronger, to turn her into marble, but that pain was nothing compared to what she was feeling now. She had never loved anyone before and now losing the one person, that she did love, was just _unbearable_. What was she supposed to do now?

* * *

_New York, 1947_

_Of course_. Of course, her first mission in America would bring her to New York City. Sometimes life was just fucking cruel. She knew that the Red Room knew that she had tried to run away, but they didn't know what, or rather _who_, was the reason. It was just cruel irony that they had sent her to check in on Dottie and her weird obsession with an agent named Carter. But maybe it was also a sign. She knew that Steve had worked with the SSR and this job gave her the opportunity to find out more about him. She had been more than shocked when she'd realized that Steve Rogers was _Captain America_, but then again, of course he was. Only a man like Steve could have make Captain America such a hero and inspiration to million of Americans. And of course, he had sacrificed his life to save the world. She was so proud of him, but it still hurt so fucking much. She still missed him so much and it had been two years. Would it always hurt this much?

Carter and Dottie were doing one of their cat and mouse chases, so Natalia decided to use that time to check out the SSR base in New Jersey, hoping that there would be files about him.

Sneaking into the facility was way too easy. The Americans really needed to work on their security. She searched the base until she finally found the building where the files were stored. It took her some time until she found the aisle where the files of the agents and soldiers where whose last name started with R.

Rogers, David.

Rogers, Matthew.

Rogers, Peter.

_Rogers, Steven. _

There he was. She had to take a deep breath to calm herself down. She pulled the file out of the cabinet and sat down on the floor. She took another deep breath before she opened the file. A photo fell out of it and she picked it up. Her heart stopped beating for a second. It was Steve before he'd gotten the serum. God, he was so beautiful. She blinked her tears away and traced his face with her fingers. He hadn't needed the serum, he had already been perfect. He still would have taken her breath away and she would have fallen in love with him. She carefully stuck the photo into her jacket. This was the only piece that she had of him and she decided to keep it. No one knew about her, but she was the only one who deserved to have it.

She read his file with a small smile on her face. He had always been a good man and the perfect candidate to get the serum. No one else would have deserved it. She laughed a little when she read that Steve had lied several times to get enlisted. Even when he had lied, he had done it for a good cause. Her heart broke for him when she found out that Steve had lost his best friend in the Alps and there had been nothing that he could have done to save him. She barely remembered Sergeant Barnes, but he had to have been a good man if he had been Steve's best friend.

She stood up, put the file back into the cabinet, and left the facility right before the sun rose. She looked around, her chest tight, thinking that this had been a place where Steve had lived, where he had gotten what he always wanted, and that he had died way before his time.

She didn't want to, but she knew that she had to go back to the Russians. She had no place in the world.

* * *

_Paris, 1958_

These kind of missions were Natalia's favorite kind. She loved to work undercover and to just live in a city for a few months while she was trying to get closer to her target. It almost felt like she was a normal person. Yes, she had to infiltrate the high society to get closer to Parisian politicians to find out what they knew about the Soviet plans and possibly had to kill a few people, but she still had time for herself. She could wander around the city, enjoy the art and just be a normal woman.

She had to buy a dress for a gala that an old and rich Parisian official had invited her to. She knew that the man wanted to sleep with her and she had to indulge him since he had strong ties to the US, and Russia had to know how far they were with their space program. The Americans had already succeeded in having the first super soldier, Russia couldn't let them have space as well. Natalia would again have to use her body to serve her country. And like every time she would try her best not to think about Steve. It still felt so wrong to be with someone else, even if it wasn't her choice.

She found a beautiful dress when she stopped by Dior and they promised to deliver it to her apartment within the week. She was eternally grateful to the sales woman who had ignored Natalia's teary reaction to the wedding dress in the back of the dressing room area. The woman probably thought that she was waiting for a proposal and not that the dress had been perfect for a wedding with her dead love.

Her and Steve could have been married for a decade if fate hadn't been so cruel to them. She hadn't aged in the last decade and she was sure that Steve wouldn't have as well. Maybe she would have been pregnant now or they would have already had children. A little boy who just looked like his father. She never bothered to go to a doctor when she was in the States to find out if her sterilization could be reversed. Why bother? The man she wanted to be the father of her children was dead.

She decided to wander around Paris after this emotional afternoon to distract herself. She couldn't let herself think too often about Steve or it would destroy her. It had been ten years and she was still in love with him. Why had she only gotten one night with the love of her life? It just wasn't fair!

A few happy couples crossed her path and she hated them all. Did they even know how lucky they were? She could understand why _she_ didn't deserve happiness and love, but why didn't Steve? Why did he have to die so young? If anyone deserved love, happiness and a long life, it would have been him.

The finale andante of Swan lake interrupted her train of thought. Where was the music coming from? She followed it and ended up in front of a dancing school. The doors were wide open and she could see the students dancing. Some of them had talent, others...not so much.

"Bonjour, mademoiselle!" An elderly woman came closer to her. Natalia could tell by her posture and grace that she was a former ballerina.

"Bonjour." She replied with a heavy American accent since it was part of her cover.

"Américain? You're welcome to stay and watch," The woman took a closer at Natalia. "Are you..a... danseuse de ballet? Uh, a _ballerina_?"

Wow, the lady was good. "Yes, as a young girl." She watched the young women end their performance. Most of them were amateurs, but they were a few who had talent.

"You're welcome to join us." The woman smiled warmly at her. "Everyone with a passion for ballet is welcome."

Natalia thought about the offer. Going to a few dance classes wouldn't jeopardize her cover. That old Parisian would probably like to seduce a young American dancer. And she hadn't danced in ages.

_I'd love to see you dance, Natalia._

Steve's voice echoed through her mind. No, she couldn't dance. No, she had wanted to dance for _him_. To work as a dancer and then come home to him.

"Are you alright, chérie?"

She looked at the woman. "I...I can't...I have to go...I'm sorry." She choked out and ran away.

* * *

_Hamptons, 1991_

Shit! She had been too late. The Winter Soldier had already completed his mission. Fuck! She gotten the intel too late that he had been ordered to kill Howard Stark. For the first time she had failed in protecting Steve's friends. God, she was so fucking furious with herself! If she had gotten here an hour earlier, she could have saved Howard and Maria Stark, but they had already been dead when she'd arrived.

She had managed to prevent countless attempts on the lives of Director Carter and the members of the Howling Commando for almost fifty years and now the Winter Soldier had ruined it. She had promised herself that she would look out for Steve's friends and now she failed that promise. She failed _Steve_.

She closed the eyes of Maria Stark and then walked over to Howard Stark.

"I know that you have been looking for him all these years. That means a lot. Even though you have no idea who I am or what I meant to him. Thank you for not giving up on him." She whispered before she closed Stark's eyes as well. It would have been great if Howard Stark would have found Steve's body and he could have gotten a real burial. Natalia only had that one photo of him and having a place where she could go and talk to him would have been nice.

She promised herself that she would keep an eye on Stark's son because she knew that Steve would want her to.

* * *

_Kiev, 2004_

She was sent to assassinate Yushchenko to ensure that Yanukovych would win and the Orange Revolution would end the way Russia wanted it to be. Usually these kind of jobs were quickly done, but she was being followed by someone from SHIELD. The agent had already prohibited two assassination attempts and Natalia was getting annoyed. She was just here to kill someone, and now she had to be careful that she wasn't going to get killed as well.

Yushchenko would speak to his supporters today and she wanted to use that chance to take him out. She knew that it was dangerous to sit on a roof with a rifle when someone was out there to kill her, but this was her first chance to get close to her target in days and she had to take it.

Her phone vibrated and she read the text that she had gotten from her handler.

_The agent's name is Barton. He's one of SHIELD's best. Eliminate the threat._

She didn't really care about the guy's name, but she would go after him once she'd killed Yushchenko. She heard people cheering and looked over to the stage. Her target was here. She was about to get to work when her rifle suddenly fell off the roof. What the hell? Was there an _arrow_ sticking to it?! _What the fuck_?

"What's a nice girl like you doing with a weapon like that?"

She turned to the side and a man was standing at the edge of the roof. _Agent Barton_. She wanted to draw her gun but he fired a _fucking arrow_ and it landed next to her, causing a little explosion. She lost her footing and the gun glided across the roof. _Great_.

"Shield can't afford modern weaponry, Robin Hood?" She taunted, while trying to come up with a plan.

"Ha, like I've never heard that nickname before. Very original!" He replied sarcastically and came closer to her, his bow pointed at her. She'd never been hit by an arrow, but it was probably painful. He had to come closer to her so she could disarm him and push him off the roof or snap his neck. "Tell me, why does someone follow kill orders when she simultaneously saves the lives of Directors Carter and Fury."

_Shit_. How did he know? "I have no idea what you mean, William Tell."

"He actually had a crossbow, not a bow." Barton smirked. "We have reason to believe that a foreign agent tried to kill Directors Carter and Fury when they had been in London. The sniper missed the car and we found his body a few hours later. We also found CCTV footage of a redheaded woman leaving the crime scene right after the failed attack." He looked downright amused and Natalia was fuming. She had been so sure that no one had seen her and that she had been out of reach of any security cams. What a rookie mistake. She had only been there to save Steve's friend Carter, she hadn't even known that the current Director had also been in the car. "You might wanna think about a new hairdo. That color is pretty recognizable."

"You wanna talk hair or you wanna fight?"

"There's no reason for us to fight. Come with me."

Her eyes widened. Had Barton lost his mind? "You think I'll surrender just like that? I know what you'll do to me. No, thank you!"

"I don't want you to surrender. I want you to join me. Join SHIELD. We can always use someone like you." Okay, he had definitely lost his mind if he'd thought that she was buying his bullshit.

"I'm not falling for that crap."

"It's not crap. You saved the lives of two SHIELD directors, and Director Carter somehow thinks that it wasn't the first time that you've done that. You can come with me and work for us. You'd have your freedom and could use your skills to help people."

She looked at him. Was he really telling the truth? Could she just switch sides? Start a new life? What was she supposed to do? She was unarmed and Barton could have already killed her, but he hadn't. What would _Steve_ do? He would believe in the good of people. He'd want her to change her life. She eyed Barton for a moment. He was relaxed, he wasn't going to kill her. She made a choice in that moment.

"Take me to your leader."

* * *

_Washington DC, 2012_

Natasha hated paperwork, but it needed to be done. Coulson always wanted everything to be done by the book and proper paperwork was part of it. She was just about to open Word when her door flew open and Coulson stormed into the room. He looked downright _excited_ and Coulson rarely showed any emotion at work.

"Are you okay? Did Thor come back to earth?"

"They found him, Natasha!" He basically screamed at her. "We finally found him."

"Who? What are you talking about?"

"Captain Rogers!" She could just stare at him. _What_? They had found Steve's body? "And he's alive! He's in a coma, but he's alive! I'm leaving in fifteen minutes to see him myself. You wanna come with me?"

Her heart was pounding in her chest. Was he really alive? After all this time? _How_?

"Natasha?"

"Uh, go without me. I still have to track down Luchkov, remember?" She managed to get out calmly, but she was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Steve was _alive_.

"Right." Coulson nodded. "Keep me updated on that." He added and left her office.

She tried to control her breathing, but she had no success. Steve was alive and she had done so many horrible things in the last seventy years. How was she ever going to face him?

_Helicarrier, 19 days later_

She was more than nervous, she had no choice but to face Steve. Clint needed her to save him from Loki and they couldn't do that without Captain America's help. Would he be happy that she was still alive? Had he even wanted to come to that bar or wouldn't he have showed up even when he could have? Had everything just been in her head? Would he hate her, once he knew who and what she really was?

Coulson came down the ramp of the quinjet with Steve in tow. He still looked exactly the same. He was still so beautiful and he looked confused and excited when he looked around. And then his eyes landed on her and he looked like he'd seen a ghost.

"Agent Romanoff." Coulson said and then pointed at Steve. "Captain Rogers."

He seemed so confused, but also _hopeful._ "Ma'am?"

She couldn't help but beam brightly at him. He was _alive_ and he was _here_. He'd come back to her.

"Hi." She breathed out, her emotions threatening to overwhelm her. "I thought we said one week and not almost seventy years, Steve Rogers."


	8. Chapter 8

_2021_

Natasha didn't like to keep things from her husband. She usually told him everything, but she wasn't ready to talk to him about what was going on with her. She had to make sure that it was a possibility and not a just a fantasy, because she didn't want to get his hopes up.

She wanted a baby and she _knew_ that he wanted the same. He would never tell her, of course, because of her infertility, but she could see it in his eyes when he watched Tony and Pepper with little Morgan. He wanted a family and she was yearning for one as well. She had for over seventy years, ever since she'd met him. She'd never thought that she wanted children until him. She wanted _his_ children. A boy that was a little version of him and a girl that would have him wrapped around her little finger. She wanted all of this. The house was more than big enough for more members of the Rogers' family and she was sure that Liho would be happy about little humans who wanted to play with her.

Natasha sighed and leaned back against the kitchen chair, staring at the screen of her laptop. She had been looking for fertility specialists who could hopefully help her become pregnant. She knew there were other ways, but she wanted to carry their baby herself. She had the name of Pepper's OB/GYN who'd helped her friend become pregnant and maybe she could help Natasha as well. Liho seemed to sense her distress and planted herself into Natasha's lap and began to purr. She stroked the cat's fur and listened to the soothing sound.

She got up after a few minutes and checked the fridge and pantry to figure out what she was going to make for dinner. Steve was out with Bucky and Sam to watch the game, but he'd promised he'd be home for supper. Steve could teach their kids how to play baseball and they could spend the weekends at their beach house. She could picture them running along the beach and Steve would throw their little girl into the air and catch her. And she and Steve would be able to watch their grandchildren grow up and start their own families.. Would the children inherit their serums as well and would live for a very long time? She should talk with Bruce about that one day.

She wiped a tear away. Fuck, she wanted this so badly. What if she wouldn't get it? Would Steve leave her one day? For a woman who could give him biological children?

No, he wouldn't. She knew that. But she also knew that he wanted to be a father and she would do whatever it took so that he would be one.

She took a deep breath and pushed all thoughts about babies away and decided to make pasta tonight. She wasn't in the mood for anything fancy.

The water was boiling and she was currently making the pesto when Steve came home. She heard him greet Liho and then he came into the kitchen.

"Hi, sweetheart." He smiled at her and kissed her softly. "I missed you."

All her bad thoughts were gone, once she was back in his presence. With him, she could only be happy and at peace. "It were only a few hours."

"It felt like a lifetime. I like you so much better than Buck and Sam."

"Sweet talker." She chuckled and stirred the pasta. "I hope pasta and pesto is okay?"

"Of course." He pushed a little bag over the kitchen counter, smiling bashfully. "I saw this on my way home."

She gave him a confused smile, grabbing the bag. Steve usually drew her little sketches as token of his affection and didn't buy her something. She opened the bag and was looking at a Cartier box. Now, she was really confused. She got the box out and opened it.

"_Steve_..."

"Do you like it?"

She laughed a little. "Of course, I do. But this isn't something that you just get on your way home." She pulled the love bracelet out of the box. It was a simple gold one, but she knew that it still had been very expensive.

"Okay, you got me." He grinned sheepishly. "I ordered it weeks ago, but the engraving took some time. The guy who knows Cyrillic was on vacation."

She looked at the inside of the bracelet. _I'll love you for eternity. _She loved the fact that he'd chosen Cyrillic so most people wouldn't be able to read the message. "It's perfect, Steve. Thank you so much." She breathed out, grabbing his face to kiss him. God, he was so perfect and good to her. "I love you so much."

He brushed her hair out of her face. "I love you, too. So damn much."

She was about to pull him into another kiss when the water boiled over and she had to run to the stove. The pasta was thankfully not overcooked and she could serve her husband dinner. He set the table and opened a wine bottle while she put pasta and pesto into two bowls.

Steve helped her put the bracelet on and she told him to keep the little screwdriver that was the only thing that could open the lock. She liked the fact that he was the only one that could get the bracelet off of her. Back in her spy days, she wouldn't have been able to wear such a prominent piece of jewelry, let alone have a tattoo. But those days were long over and she could wear the bracelet to public events, when she had to leave her rings at home.

They were already done with dinner, but they were still sitting at the kitchen table, drinking wine.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you- Sam's gonna be an uncle again. His sister is pregnant."

"That's great." She managed to say. She knew she was being petty, but Sam's sister already had two kids and Natasha had none. When would it be _her_ turn? "When's she due?"

"This summer, I think. We should send her something."

She nodded absently. Everyone was having children, except them. It just wasn't fair. "I'll order something from the boutique where we bought Morgan's treasure chest."

Steve did the dishes while she wrote the grocery list. "I think I'll take a bath." She told Steve after she pinned the list to the fridge.

"You want company?" He asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Not tonight." She said softly and kissed his cheek. She wasn't in the mood. Steve, being Steve, of course didn't pout or tried to get her to say yes to sex; he just wished her a nice bath.

She drew herself a hot bath and got out of her clothes. She looked at her naked body in the mirror, picturing herself with a baby bump. Her gaze fell to her new bracelet and she smiled. She knew that she had a good life. Most women didn't have such a wonderful husband. But she wanted _more_. She wanted to have her husband's children and she would make that happen. If there was one thing that she and Steve had in common, then it was their stubbornness.

* * *

She had to put her search for a specialist on hold, because her family needed her. Bucky's niece Jamie died in a car crash and left her teenage daughter Rikki behind. The girl was obviously upset that her mother was dead and Bucky tried his best to be there for her. Natasha was surprised how hard it was for Bucky to get custody for his grandniece. He had been pardoned, he had a big apartment and enough money to take care of the girl. He was mentally stable and he was more than welcome to take a break from the team to be there for Rikki. There was a distant cousin in Florida where she could live as well, but neither Rikki nor her uncle wanted that. Rikki was a good kid and she deserved to stay in New York where her friends lived.

They were a lot of hearings in Rikki's case, and Natasha was sure that having Captain America as a character witness sealed the deal in the end, and Bucky was granted custody over Rikki Barnes.

She and Steve invited Bucky, Rikki and their lawyers Matt and Foggy to lunch at Rikki's favorite cafe, but Matt and Foggy had to head to a different case, so it was just the four of them.

Rikki was still grieving her mother, but Natasha could see that she was happy that she could live with her uncle. Bucky himself was over the moon, Steve had told her that Bucky would have moved to Florida if Rikki would have had to live with her cousin so she wouldn't be alone. He was a good man.

Steve and Bucky were at the bar, picking up their order, while she and Rikki looked for a table. They found one in the back of the cafe and Rikki sat down next to her in the booth. Without really thinking about, Natasha wrapped her arm around the girl.

"Is it bad that I'm happy?"

She looked at Rikki. "No, it's not. It's okay to be happy. And it's also okay to be sad. Your mom would want you to live your life. You can grieve for her, but still be happy about things, Rikki. There are no rules when it comes to grief, sweetie."

"I never lived with a guy before." She mumbled and Natasha laughed.

"You'll be fine. Just remind your uncle to always put the toilet seat back down." She joked and pressed a kiss to her temple. "And you can call me if he gives you trouble, okay?"

Bucky and Steve came with their food in that moment. "And who do I call if the kid gives_ me_ trouble?"

"No one." She replied and shared a grin with Rikki.

She and Steve went home after lunch to give Bucky and Rikki some privacy. Her husband gave her a deep kiss when they were inside their house.

"What was that for?"

He smiled and caressed her cheek. "You've been so great to Rikki. And to Bucky. With everything." He kissed her forehead and she sighed. "She really looks up to you. It's important that she has a female attachment figure after losing her mother."

"She's a great kid."

Steve nodded. "Yeah, she is. I can't believe that Bucky is now technically a parent."

Her smile dropped a little. When would they become parents? She almost asked Steve, but she kept it to herself.

* * *

The appointment with Pepper's gynecologist had been devastating. According to her, the Red Room hadn't done a normal sterilization, no, they had basically destroyed her uterus and ovaries. The doctor wanted to talk to a few of her colleagues, but Natasha could tell that she wasn't very convinced that they would say something different. The woman couldn't even tell her if Natasha's eggs were still usable. Natasha knew that the chances of having her own biological child were pretty much nonexistent.

She tried to get her emotions under control on her way home. The gynecologist had been in Boston and she'd told Steve that she had to take care of something for Fury. She was devastated, but she wasn't willing to give up yet. Science was capable of so many incredible things, there had to be a way for her to get pregnant.

Natasha got through the front door and was greeted by Liho who rubbed herself against her legs. She patted her head and walked further into the house. She looked for Steve, but he wasn't downstairs.

She heard him singing when she walked up the stairs and found him in the guestroom. He had Morgan in his arms and was singing to her. Her chest felt tight at the sight before her. Would he ever be able to sing their own child to sleep?

He looked from Morgan to her and smiled. "Hi." He whispered, moving a sleeping Morgan to her portacrib. "Pepper and Tony had to leave town for a work thing and I offered to babysit." He laid the baby gently down and covered her with her blanket. He looked at the little girl with so much affection and joy that it killed her. He was born to be a father and she was the reason that he didn't have a child.

"Nat, what's wrong?" He asked with a worried look on his face.

She blinked at him, tears rolling down her cheeks. She hadn't even noticed that she was crying. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"For what?" He took the baby phone and walked her out of the room. "Natalia, what happened? Did something happen to Fury?"

"No." She shook her head. "I lied. I didn't have to handle something for Nick. I...I went to see a gynecologist in Boston."

"What happend to your one in New- _oh_." Steve was way smarter than people gave him credit for. "That's the one that helped Pepper...with Morgan, right?"

She nodded, not being able to look at him. Steve's arms were suddenly around her, pulling her against him. She buried her face in his chest and he ran his hand over her back. "I take it that it didn't go so well?" She nodded again and he pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "I'm sorry, Nat."

She looked up at him and his eyes were full of love and devotion. "They destroyed my body and it doesn't look like the damage can be fixed. There are a still a few people that might be able to help, but...I don't know if I will ever be able to give you a child."

He cupped her face and kissed her. "I don't need a child to be happy with you, you know that, right?"

"But you _want_ one, right?"

He sighed and rested his forehead against hers. "Natasha-"

"Please tell me the truth and not what you think I need to hear, Steve."

He pulled away to look at her and she could see the longing in his eyes. "Would I be happy if you told me that you were pregnant? Of course. But like I said, I love the life we have."

He was _still_ trying to spare her feelings. "I want a baby, Steve. I want _your_ baby. Do you want that, too?"

He closed his eyes. "Yes." He whispered. "Yes, I want that. I want to be the father of your children." It looked like the dam was broken now. "I want a little girl that looks just like you. She's gonna have your spirit and she's gonna be our little princess. You're gonna teach her ballet and you two are gonna wear matching tutus."

She started crying again. He had his own fantasies about their family. He wiped the tears away. "That sounds so lovely, but I don't know if I can give you that little girl."

"I love you. I love you more than I thought I would ever love someone, Natalia. You're my life." He kissed her softly. "And we're in this together. I can come with you to your next appointment. There are so many ways to have children these days." He kissed her again, this time deeply and passionately. "I need you to know that you're enough for me. I will still love and want you, no matter what."

"I love you, too." She whispered. She felt a lot better. She just prayed that they would have that little girl one day. And the boy she was picturing in her head.

* * *

Natasha's happiness was the most important thing to Steve. His wife came before anything and anyone else. And seeing her like this broke his heart. They had gone two specialist together and they both had bad news. Natasha had asked if they were at least able to extract eggs from her body for a surrogate, but none of them could say if it could work. He knew that she wanted to carry their baby herself, so it hadn't be easy for her to ask.

Yes, he wanted children. He hadn't really thought a lot about it when Natasha had told him all those years ago that she couldn't get pregnant. He'd really only wanted her and he didn't _need_ children. But he wanted them, he had for a while now. How could he not? Natasha was the love of his life and the most amazing person he'd ever met. She would be a wonderful mother. He wanted their family to grow. He often pictured Natasha with a mini version of herself in her arms. He saw how happy Pepper and Tony were with Morgan, and he wanted that for him and Natasha as well.

And it broke him when Natasha admitted to him that she had dreamed about them having children since they had met. She had this dream for almost eighty years and he wanted to make it happen. God, he wanted to be the father of her children so badly. They could adopt a baby, but he wasn't so sure if an adoption agency would give two people a child with their kind of lives. It had been so difficult for Bucky to get custody over his own niece.

Their last appointment had been in London and they were still in the city. Natasha was showering while he made a few phone calls. She was wrapped into a fluffy robe when she came into the bedroom of their suite.

"When's our flight back again?" She asked, flopping down onto the bed.

He sat down next to her and ran his hand down her smooth leg. "Change of plans."

"Huh?"

"We're spending the weekend in Paris. We need this. Just you and me, Nat. No talks about babies or ovaries or anything like that. We can't let this dictate our life."

His wife played with the belt of her robe. "Are you mad that it's such a difficult journey and it might end up fruitless?"

"No, sweetheart. I'm not mad. And I can live without children, but I can't live without you. And we have to remember that we're also a couple. Let me take my wife to Paris so I can romance her."

She was finally smiling at him. "I'd love that, darling. No more talk about our problems." She sat up on her knees and let her bathrobe fall down her body. He licked his lips and Natasha smirked. It had been some time since the last time they made love. "I want you, Steve."

He basically pounced on her, Natasha's laughter filling the suite.

Their weekend in Paris was perfect. They wandered around the city, went to the Louvre and the Muséé d'Orsay, and he even managed to get tickets for the Ballet de l'Opéra to surprise his wife. They made love again and again, had dinner at the Eifel Tower, and went shopping at Dior. He had been surprised that she wanted to do that, but he could tell that it meant something to her. She told him when they were laying in their hotel bed that she had found her dream wedding dress decades ago in that Dior store and that her actual dress had been a replica because she hadn't been able to track down the original one.

* * *

_2022_

Natasha still couldn't believe that she was in Wakanda. The African country had opened its borders just months ago and surprised the rest of the world with its advanced technology and science. Wakanda was already living in the future.

She couldn't even remember what led to it, but she found out that the Wakandan medical field was way ahead of the rest of the world. The things Wakandan scientists and physicians could accomplish were truly miracles. Paralyzed people could walk again and women, who were told they could never get pregnant, gave birth to healthy babies. Princess Shuri, the sister of King T'challa, had been certain that she could fix Natasha's fertility issues and for the first time Natasha believed a scientist. The woman was so bright and had already made so many impossible things possible, that this would work as well.

Sam was leading the team while she and Steve were in Wakanda for Natasha's surgery. Steve was nervous and worried about her, which she appreciated, but there was no reason for it. This would work. She just _knew_ it.

They had dinner with the king, talking politics and possibly working together. She tried to pay attention, but she was too excited for tomorrow. Shuri had explained more than once to her how the procedure worked, but it was honestly a bit too complicated for her. And Natasha didn't really care what was done to her as long as it would work.

Steve was by her side, holding her hand, until she had to be taken to the OR. He let more than reluctantly go off her hand and told her that he loved her. The anesthesia worked pretty fast and she was out even before Shuri came to the OR to operate the machine that would heal her uterus and ovaries.

Natasha woke up with Steve already looking at her, his hand holding hers again. "Hi." He whispered softly.

"Hey." She answered, feeling surprisingly good.

"How are you?"

"Good. I'm not in pain." She smiled and pressed a kiss to his hand. "I feel actually pretty great. How did it go?"

Steve was now beaming at her. "You have the healthy uterus and ovaries of a twenty-something woman." He kissed her lips softly and tears were in her eyes. God, she was so relieved. "We have to wait for one cycle so your body can adjust and then we can start trying."

"Really?"

He nodded. "Yeah, really." He looked so happy.

She put her hand on her belly. She would never be able to repay Shuri for this. She looked at Steve who was still grinning brightly.

"I hope you know that means that I'll have my period soon, right? Is Captain America brave enough to get tampons for his wife? And I might get cranky. I haven't had my period in almost ninety years."

"Captain America never backs down from a challenge. And your PMS might be a good practice for when you are pregnant."

* * *

Steve got the text that his wife was ovulating when he was out with Sam having a few beers. He was grateful to Sam that he didn't say anything when he threw a few bills on the table and hastily left after saying goodbye to his friend. He knew that Bucky would have giving him shit about the whole thing. Their friends knew that they were working on having a baby and were very supportive, some more than others. He really hadn't needed the list of the most _fruitful_ sex positions that Tony had given him after the last team meeting.

He raced home on his Harley and almost knocked over poor Liho, when he stormed through the front door. Well, the cat had to get used to that. Kids could be a bit rough.

"Natalia?"

"Bedroom!" She yelled back and he sprinted up the stairs. He was nervous which was silly. He had been intimate with Natasha countless times, but this time it was _different_.

He opened the bedroom door and was greeted by a beautiful sight. Natasha had lit candles and was posing on their bed. She was wearing a new negligee that made her look like sin personified.

"Wow."

She smirked, clearly happy with his reaction. "Just because we're making a baby, doesn't mean it can't be fun."

"Yeah." He managed to get out and Natasha beckoned him to join her. He shut the door so Liho wouldn't disturb them and got to work.

Their first try wasn't successful, but they knew that it never really worked for any couple the first month. Natasha was sad when she got her period and he tried his best to cheer her up. They had already bought pregnancy tests, but this month they would stay untouched. They would be young for a very long time and they were both completely healthy, it would happen for them.

Rikki was turning sixteen and they threw her a party at the Tower. The whole team was here and all of Rikki's friends to celebrate her big day. He and Natasha had gifted the girl a new laptop and were watching her open her other presents when Natasha's app alerted her that she was ovulating. They managed to sneak away and ended up in the locker room of the gym floor.

"I think this was it." Natasha said, pulling her panties back up. It had been smart of her to wear a dress today.

"Nat-" He didn't want her to get her hopes up already.

"I know, I know. But I can feel it. We just made our baby." She smiled happily. "Let's never tell the little one how we conceived them." She grinned and pecked his lips. "Who wants to know that they are the result of a quickie at a party?"

He laughed and zipped his pants up. Bucky looked at them like he knew what they had been doing when they came back, but Steve didn't care. He was hoping deep down that Nat was right and they had just conceived their first child. They soon said goodbye to Rikki and the others to go home and try to make a baby a few more times. Better be safe than sorry.

He was out of the country when Natasha would be having her period, even though they both hoped that she wouldn't have it. She hadn't called or texted him and he didn't want to ask her if she'd gotten her period.

He got home before midnight, thinking that Natasha was already sleeping, but it looked she was still awake. The lights upstairs were on. Liho didn't come to greet him. That was a bit strange, was the cat sleeping?

"Natasha, sweetheart?"

"Bathroom."

He walked to the master bathroom and found Natasha sitting on the floor, Liho purring in her lap. "Nat?" He asked, confused. He was only now noticing the pregnancy tests in front of her.

"I'm too afraid to look. I'm two days late." She whispered. "But that doesn't have to mean anything."

"You want me to look?" He asked softly, kneeling down next to her. She nodded and he picked the first one up. Natasha had used at least six tests. He read the first one. His heart starting beating faster. And then he read the next one. And the one after that. He checked them all and they all said the same. _Pregnant._

"Natalia, look at me." She did and he smiled at her. They were finally going to be parents. God, Natasha finally got what she wanted for all those years. He would be a _father_. He would have a family of his own. He hoped that his mother could somehow see them right now. "They're positive. You're pregnant!"

She blinked at him. "Really?" She asked very quietly.

"Yeah, we're gonna have a baby." He beamed at her.

Natasha pushed Liho off her lap to crawl into his. "We're having a baby?" Her voice broke at the end of the sentence.

"Yeah, sweetheart. You're going to be a mom."

She smiled brightly at him and then buried her face in his neck. "I'm pregnant!"


	9. Chapter 9

_2022 _

Steve celebrated his 104th birthday with Natasha at their beach house. He had never been a fan of birthday parties and Natasha had to fight with her morning sickness so she wasn't in the mood for a party as well. She was at the end of her first trimester and his poor wife had to deal with all the symptoms. She could barely keep any food to herself, was exhausted all the time and she _hated_ pretty much every shower gel and aftershave he'd tried. He'd given up on shaving and used just plain soap to wash his body because everything else made her nauseous.

He had been in town, getting stuff for their BBQ tonight. Natasha had tried to make him breakfast, but the smell made her sick and she had to run to the bathroom. He had felt a little helpless, when she'd started crying because she thought that she'd ruined his birthday. She always made him breakfast in bed on his birthday and her pregnancy hormones were making her more emotional than usual. He'd told her that everything was okay and he just wanted to spend time with her. His wife was growing their child inside of her, that was already the best birthday present.

He put everything in the fridge before he looked for his wife. He found her on their bed in the bedroom, laying on her side, her face towards the windows. He thought that she was napping so he wanted to leave her alone.

"Hey." She whispered and turned around. God, she was so beautiful. She already had the famous pregnancy glow and she looked breathtaking. She truly was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. And she was pregnant with _his_ child. How did he get so lucky?

"Hi, sweetheart." He came closer and sat down on the bed. "How are you feeling?"

"A little better." She reached her hand across the mattress and he laced their fingers together. "I'm sorry, but I don't think you'll get birthday sex this year."

"That's okay." He chuckled and squeezed her hand. "I've read that women are insatiable in their second trimester. It's probably best if I save my energy for that." He winked at her and she laughed. "And besides, I'm sure you'll make it up to me next year."

"Next year, there will be a little_ baby_." She smiled dreamily and he was sure that he looked the same. "I'm sure the little one will want all of our attention." She scooted closer to him and put his hand on her stomach. She did that a lot. He couldn't wait for when he would feel the baby kick. "I'm so happy, Steve."

He bent down to kiss her. "Me, too, sweetheart. Me, too." He whispered and laid down next to her for an afternoon nap.

Natasha managed to get a bit of salad down later that day, but pushed the ribs over to him because she couldn't stand the smell. They watched the fireworks from the balcony, and he was happy and content with his pregnant wife sleeping in his arms.

He woke up later that night because someone was poking him in the shoulder. "Steve? Wake up, darling!"

He blinked his eyes open and Natasha was hovering over him, looking down at him. "What? Are you okay? Is the baby okay?"

She smiled. "Yes, we're both okay."

He sat up and looked at her confused. "Then what is it?"

"I forgot to give you your present, my love." She smiled sheepishly. "I think I already suffer from pregnancy brain."

He hadn't even noticed that she hadn't given him anything and he honestly didn't care. He didn't need presents. He was married to the love of his life and she was pregnant with his child, what more could a man want?

"It's nothing fancy." She said, almost looking guilty. She handed him a wrapped box. "I made it myself."

He unwrapped the box and opened it. A leather-bound photo album was inside of it. "You made this?"

She nodded and her cheeks flushed. "I picked up a few skills over the decades. Open it."

He did as he was told and his breath got caught in his throat. She had made this album for their family, for their children. She had written their love story onto the first pages and included the napkin he'd drawn a ballerina onto when they had met. She had put a wedding photo and the first ultrasound picture of their baby in it as well. There were also pictures of their friends and photos of the two of them over the last ten years. He smiled at that. They had been together for ten years and were still madly in love with each other. And now their love created a baby. There were still a lot of empty pages left in the book.

"We can fill it with photos of our family. Add our children to it. This is our family book." She said softly. "Do you like it?"

He cupped her face and kissed deeply. "I love it, sweetheart. This is a great idea." Natasha beamed happily at him. "But you said _children_. How many do you want?"

"Honestly?" She bit her lip and he nodded. "Three or four. We can afford it and we have so much love to give. I want a big family with you."

He pecked her lips. "We can have as many children as you want. It's your body, your choice. I want as many children as you are willing to give me. I want our house to be filled with love and children's laughter."

Natasha slung her arms around his neck to kiss him. "You're my dream come true, Steve. All I want is you and this baby." She kissed him again. "And the babies after this one."

She pressed herself against him, kissing him hotly. He tried to pull away because his body started to react to her, but she tightened her hold on him. "I'm feeling better. I want you." She whispered into his ear before she bit into his earlobe. "Make love to me."

And he did.

Steve woke up alone the next morning, a little bit confused. The space next to him was cold, so Natasha had already been up for some time. Was she feeling sick again?

"Natasha, sweetheart?" He asked, getting out of the bed and searching for his underwear.

"Bathroom." Was her answer. God, he hoped that she wasn't feeling sick.

He put on his underwear and made his way into the bathroom. He stopped in the threshold, his heart fluttering in his chest because of the sight in front of him. She was standing in front of the mirror, completely naked, only wearing her rings and bracelet. Her right hand was on her stomach who was a little bit arched. She started _showing_!

"Can you see it?" She turned so he could see her from the side. "I know it's not much-"

"I see it." He breathed out. "God, Natalia, you're so beautiful. Stay right there!" She looked confused, but nodded. He quickly left to get his phone and took a few photos of his pregnant wife. He already knew that he would start a portrait of her later today.

"I hope you don't share this with the Avengers group chat." She laughed, posing for him.

"No one is ever going to see you like this besides me." He grinned back. God, she was truly a vision. "Cover your breasts with your arms so we have a photo that we can show the little one later, so they can see how beautiful their mommy was when she was pregnant with them."

She did as she was told and he took a few more picture of her. "I think we should do this every month."

"Good idea, sweetheart." He put his phone onto the edge of the bathtub and walked over to her. "You are so beautiful."

She smiled up at him. "Thank you, darling." She pressed herself against him and ran her hands down his back. "Steve?"

"Yes? Do you want breakfast?"

"No." She shook her head. "I think my second trimester has already started."

"Okay?"

She bit her lip, looking almost embarrassed which was very unlike his wife. She rose to her tiptoes and pressed her lips against his ear. "I'm horny."

He laughed when her hands landed on his ass. He had a thing for hers and she had one for his. Perfect match. "You're really know how to set the mood, doll." He gave her a dirty kiss and picked her up to carry her to the bedroom. It wasn't his birthday anymore, but it still felt like it was with the things they did that morning.

* * *

Seeing Natasha pregnant was still the most beautiful thing Steve had ever seen. She was so happy and just glowing. Her baby bump was still relatively small, but it was noticeable and Natasha wore it with pride. She wore loose clothing outside, but when she was in their house she wore tight shirts and leggings to show off her baby bump. They always sat on their patio at the end of the day with Natasha in his arms and his hand on her belly and Liho was sitting Natasha's lap. The cat was very gentle and protective of Natasha.

Natasha wasn't an active member of the team anymore since the start of her pregnancy and Sam was now his second in command. He hadn't told his friend about it yet, but Steve planned to pass the shield onto him. Steve would still join them, just like Nat, if they were needed, but they both wanted to focus on their family. A child needed a lot of attention, and their jobs were just too dangerous and he didn't want to leave Natasha and their child behind, and he couldn't even imagine doing this without his wife. No, it was time to give up the shield, at least until all of their kids were in college. And Sam would make a great Captain America.

He was already home and decided to continue to clean out the room next to their bedroom that would be the nursery. The baby would sleep in their bedroom for the first months, but they still wanted the room to be done before the baby was here. They had used the room as storage, and unfortunately a lot of stuff had ended up in here over the years. He was packing boxes for the storage unit when he heard that Natasha was coming home. She had been shopping with Laura since she and Clint were in town to celebrate their anniversary and Laura needed something for the occasion.

He shut the box and left the room to greet her. Natasha was still in the hallway with Liho in her arms and her face pressed into the cat's fur. He chuckled quietly when he saw the shopping bags around his wife. She had always loved shopping and she especially loved buying things for the baby.

"Hi."

She removed her face from Liho's fur and let the cat back down. "Hi." She smiled back at him and he came closer to kiss her.

"How was the shopping trip?"

"Good." She pecked his lips again. "It was great to catch up with Laura. It was just weird that Laura was the one who bought sexy lingerie and I'm the one who bought unsexy maternity fashion. You'd think they made better clothes by now." She shook her head and kissed him again. "I missed you, though. And the baby missed you, too."

"Yeah?" He pressed his hand on her belly. Natasha was already feeling the baby kick, but he hadn't had the privilege yet. "I missed you two, too."

Natasha smiled happily and kissed him again. "Steve? I'm hungry _and_ horny."

He laughed, giving her another kiss. This was pretty much her constant mood in the last two months. And she was so energetic that it was starting to freak him out. She had no problem to run around Brooklyn all day to shop baby things and then she wore him out in the bedroom. He was starting to think that _she_ was the one with the super serum and not him. While he was trying to catch his breath after their lovemaking, Natasha padded into the kitchen on the hunt for something to eat.

"How about I make you something to eat and then I take care of your other urge." He squeezed her ass and Natasha chuckled.

"Sounds like a plan." She went to the bedroom to put away her new clothes while he headed to the kitchen to make his pregnant wife something to eat.

Natasha had changed into one of his button down shirts when she came into the kitchen and he noticed with much joy that even under the too big shirt her belly bump was visible. She sat down on one of the chairs at the kitchen island, watching him making her a sandwich.

"Anything new with the Bartons?"

"Oh, yes! Cooper got that internship with the senator! He's very excited." She said, grabbing some strawberries from the bowl on the kitchen island. "And Nate is in the finals of the spelling bee contest."

"That's great. Clint and Laura must be so proud of their boys."

She nodded. "Yeah. It distracts Clint from the fact that Lila is going to college next year. I can't believe that my little Lila is almost a grown woman!"

He pushed the finished sandwich over to her, smiling. "It's gonna be even weirder when it's our _own_ kids who are gonna leave the house. Does Lila already know where she wants to go?"

"She asked Tony to write her a recommendation letter for MIT, so I think that's a favorite. I know that he's interested in Lila working for SI one day. She's truly a genius. She definitely didn't get that from Clint." She grinned and bit into her sandwich.

He laughed and shook his head. "Can you imagine how Buck is gonna react when Rikki leaves for college?"

Nat snorted. "He's gonna move into the dorm with her to make sure that she's not gonna meet guys like him. I taught her how to deal with men, he doesn't have to worry."

"You taught her how to kick them in the balls?"

"Yup. I will teach that our daughters as well!"

"That's my girl." He smiled proudly and moved around the kitchen counter to press a kiss to her forehead.

* * *

Bucky was helping him getting the boxes to the storage unit while Natasha was helping Rikki with her history assignment about the Soviet Union. Apparently Bucky had provided his niece with a lot of intel that she couldn't use for her school project without the CIA or Shield knocking on their door, so Natasha'd volunteered to help. Bucky and Rikki were a good team and he could see how much it meant to Bucky that he could take care of Rikki. He had missed watching his little sister grow into a woman and Bucky had loved Rebecca more than anything, but he had now the chance with Rikki and he knew that Rebecca and her daughter would be proud if they could see the two. Rikki had already offered to babysit for them, saying that she could use some extra money.

He and Bucky stopped by a diner to get food for the four of them before they drove back to the house. They found Natasha and Rikki in the living room with Rikki practicing her presentation. Natasha was sitting on the couch, eating a yogurt, and Liho was naturally next to her and it almost looked like the cat was actually listening to what Rikki was saying.

"Hi, you two!" He said, walking over to Nat to properly greet her. He bent down to kiss her quickly, but his wife deepened the kiss and he happily participated in it.

"Ew!" Rikki whined in the background and Nat grinned into the kiss.

"Yeah, ew!" Her uncle agreed. "Get off your wife, you already got her pregnant! I'm hungry!"

Steve watched Natasha absently eating her burger, her hand on her stomach. She was deep in thought and smiling from time to time. He was sure that she was thinking about their baby. She was five months pregnant, but it still amazed him every single day to see her pregnant. She loved being pregnant and he was just happy to see her so happy. He knew that she would be an amazing mother, he had seen the way she was with the Barton kids, with Morgan, and now with Rikki. God, their baby was so lucky to have Natasha as their mom.

He walked Rikki and Bucky after supper to the door and he noticed that Rikki was carrying a bag. He smiled, but didn't say anything about it. He was sure that Natasha had given the girl something from her closet.

His wife was laying on the couch with Liho on her lap, and the cat had her ear pressed against Natasha's belly. Could the cat hear the baby?

He joined her on the couch and Nat immediately snuggled into his side. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head and Liho jumped off her lap, not pleased that her human pillow had moved.

"What did you give Rikki this time?"

"Just a jeans jacket that I haven't worn since the late 90s. I'll never wear it again and she liked it." She snuggled even closer to him. "Don't worry, I have still enough clothes to give to our daughters."

"I know." He chucked. "The majority of the boxes that Buck and I took to the storage unit are your clothes, sweetheart."

Her eyes were closed and he thought that she'd fallen asleep, but she was still awake. "I want Clint to be one of the godparents of the baby."

"Yes." He agreed. Clint was a great choice. "Do we need godfather and god_mother_ or can it be two godfathers?"

She smiled, her eyes still closed. "Bucky can be a godparent, too."

He kissed her forehead and smiled at her. His wife knew him so well.

* * *

Ten years. Ten years they managed to keep their relationship a secret from the world. And now _everyone_ knew. The story that Captain America and Black Widow were together was everywhere. Every news outlet, every blog, just everyone was reporting about it.

Natasha hadn't come out of the bedroom yet. The world didn't know yet that she was pregnant and she was terrified that they would. And he was too. The baby had two super serums running through its veins and both serums were _very_ valuable. The thought that someone could try to take Natasha to...Steve couldn't even finish that thought or he would lose his mind. He had to keep the two most important people in his life safe. Natasha and the baby were his whole world.

He stood in front of the bedroom door, trying to come up with something to cheer Nat up. They had been always so careful. They'd never worn their rings to public events and didn't really show any PDA when they were outside. They'd even hired a private Lamaze teacher who came home to them instead of going to a class. He'd felt bad that Natasha didn't have the chance to bond with other mothers. There were Pepper and Laura who were a big help to Natasha, but it would have been nice if she'd could talk to someone who was _currently_ going through the same thing, but the risk was too high. The Lamaze teacher had signed a NDA that would pretty much ruin her entire existence if she told anyone who her clients were. He had felt guilty when he'd read the NDA that Pepper had sent over, but the safety of Nat and the baby was more important than anything.

He opened the door and peaked inside the room. Natasha was lying on their bed with Liho pressed against her side. Her hand was on her growing baby bump and he was sure that people would realize why she was wearing baggy clothes outside; he wasn't even sure if they could even still hide the bump.

"Natasha sweetheart?"

"We have to protect the baby." She whispered.

"I know." He answered and got into the bed, pulling her against him. His hand landed next to hers and he hoped that he would feel the baby kick. He had felt it a few times over the last two weeks and it was just... _amazing_. "We will. I promise you that I will always protect you two."

"What are we going to do?" He wished he had an answer. "Do we know who leaked it?"

"No. But it has to be someone who works at the Tower. Friday is looking into it." He said and Natasha made an unhappy sound.

"What if they are coming for the baby?"

He couldn't think about that. He only knew that he would kill anyone who would even think about laying a hand on his family. "No one even knows about the baby yet." He said, trying to calm her.

"But they will. I tried not to think about it, but one day they will know. Someone just has to see one of us with a baby and post it online and then..."

"You know that Friday deletes those posts immediately." He started to rub her belly. "And the world knows about Morgan."

"She's not the daughter of a super soldier." She whispered quietly and buried her face in his shoulder. She had a point.

"We can protect our child." He kissed her head. "I know you, Nat. You are going to be a mama bear. No one's wanna mess with your baby."

"I already love the little one so much, Steve. _So much_." She mumbled into his shirt. "I can't even..."

"I know how you feel." The love he felt for his child was unlike anything he'd ever experienced.

She looked up at him. "I always knew that people would eventually know that we are James' parents. I mean, at the latest when he goes to kindergarten or tells people who his parents are...but it's still scary!"

"_James_?" He asked softly. She wanted to name the baby James? And she thought that it was a boy? They didn't even know the sex yet, they wanted it to be a surprise.

"Yeah." She smiled a little. "James for a boy, and Sarah if it's a girl. But I think it's a boy."

"_Nat_." He choked out. She wanted to name the baby after his best friend or his mother?

"Do you like the names?"

"I love them!" He kissed her softly and hugged her closer to him. "But we don't have to name them after-"

"No, I _want_ to. And I want Clint or Laura as their middle names."

"I love that."

She smiled and kissed him again. She soon fell asleep in his arms and he looked up the ceiling, praying that nothing would ever happen to her and their child.

It was a former employer of SI who'd hit on Rikki's _underage _friend during Rikki's birthday party which Tony had witnessed and immediately fired him. The guy had been angry and sold them out to the tabloids. SI wanted to sue, but it was already too late. The world knew that they were married and one day they would know about the baby. Tony came over to install a new and improved security system that was connected to Friday and Natasha felt a little better. And Steve did too. Tony stayed for dinner and he shared with them that he was always worried about Morgan's safety, but it was no way to live. And Tony was right, if anyone could protect their children, then it was them.

* * *

"And there's your baby." Bruce said with a smile and both Steve and Natasha looked at the screen with big smiles on their faces. "Little Rogers is healthy. There's no abnormal development. The serums don't seem to have any effect on the baby. How are you feeling, Nat?"

"Great. Well, I mean my back aches and I have to pee all the time, but I'm good." She laughed and Bruce nodded.

"Good. I send everything to your obstetrician. Have you decided where you wanna give birth?"

"Here, at the Tower." Natasha answered. "It's the safest place in the world. Well, according to Tony."

Steve pressed a kiss to her head. So far, they managed to keep the pregnancy a secret, but they had still six weeks ahead of them. They thanked Bruce for taking a look at the baby and Steve wondered if Bruce knew what sex the baby had. Natasha was convinced that they were having a boy ( _a mother just knows these things, Steve!), _but he was still dreaming about a little redheaded girl. He would love a son just as much, but he was still picturing a mini version of Natasha running around the house.

Happy drove them home and Natasha immediately walked up the stairs into the nursery. He followed her after he changed the water in Liho's bowl and gave her some nibbles.

"Hey." He said softly, watching Natasha rearrange some books in the bookshelf.

"Hi."

"You okay?"

She turned around and smiled. "Yes, of course. I just want everything to be perfect."

"I know. And it is." He looked around. The nursery made things feel real. Their baby would be living here. Natasha had chosen everything with so much love and affection, the room looked beautiful. She'd chosen gender-neutral colors and he'd painted the room and drawn animals onto the walls. Natasha had sat in the rocking chair, talking to him. It had been the perfect afternoon. Laura had gifted them the Barton mobile and added a little Cap shield and an hourglass to it.

"Are you hungry, sweetheart?"

She shook her head and moved away from the bookshelf. "No, thank you. I think I'll take a nap. Do you want to join me, darling?"

"Of course." He kissed her lips before he bent down to press a kiss to her belly. They walked hand in hand to the bedroom and Steve waited until his wife found a comfortable position until he joined her in bed.

"He's soon here."

He chuckled. "Still convinced it's a boy?"

"I know it. Next one will be your little girl." She yawned and laced their fingers together. "I can't wait to meet our child."

"Me, too." He lifted their hands and kissed the back of her hand.

* * *

Steve and Tony went alone to the birthday party of the President. The rest of the team was helping Shield, and Bucky stayed in New York to keep an eye on Natasha. They both had told Nat that he wasn't going on the mission because of Rikki, but of course she knew that was a lie. But Natasha was heavily pregnant and she needed protection and Steve trusted all of his friends, but Bucky was _different_. He would protect Natasha and the baby no matter what.

Steve didn't even want to attend the party, but he knew he had to. The Avengers were technically freelancing and a good relationship with the President was very important. He'd ignored questions about Natasha and changed the subject. Being with Natasha for ten years had taught him a few things about these things.

He was talking to the Secretary of State when Tony suddenly appeared at his side, a little bit out of breath. "Why aren't you answering your fucking phone, Rogers!"

Steve looked from the Secretary to his friend. "Uh...I think my battery died. What is it?"

Now Tony looked a bit uneasy. "Uh...It's about...uh, the game...Your team won... and you've won 1000 dollars! Congrats, pal. Come with me to tell them your... bank info." What the fuck was Tony talking about?! He tried to ask him, but Tony was already leading him away from the Secretary. "Bye!"

He followed Tony out of the room, getting more confused by the second. Did something happen with Shield? "Tony-"

Tony looked around and he only started to speak when the waiter was gone. "Okay, don't freak out. But Natasha's in labor-"

"What?! No, the baby's not due for another three weeks!"

"Well, looks like the baby thinks differently. No one could reach you, so they called me." Tony tugged on his arm. "Friday's already sent a quinjet to the White House. Let's go, daddy."

He followed Tony on autopilot. Holy shit. The baby was coming. Natasha was in labor and he wasn't there. Fuck! What if he would be too late and he missed the birth? The quinjet was fast, but what if the baby was faster?! Oh God, he was on the verge of a panic attack! He tried to calm down, but he wasn't very successful. The baby was coming!

"Are you okay?" Tony asked him when the quinjet took off.

"No!"

Tony chuckled. "It's totally normal to freak out! I was losing my mind when Pepper was in labor. I don't think I was useful to her at all."

"What if I'm too late and the baby's already there?"

"Well, then Red is gonna hold that over your head for the rest of your life."

"That's not funny." He shot back. God, his wife was in labor and he wasn't there. Would he really miss the first moments of his baby's life? He wanted to be there when the baby would be laid on Natasha's chest and she was holding the baby for the first time.

"Is Natasha okay?"

"Yes, Captain Rogers, she is fine." Friday's voice suddenly filed the jet. "She's dilated by 7 centimeters. Her contractions are regularly and she and the baby are doing fine. Miss Rogers said, and I quote, to hurry the fuck up-" The AI sounded amused. "Or you are going to sleep on the couch for eternity."

"See." Tony smiled. "We still got three centimeters to go and we're only 40 minutes away from the Tower."

Those 40 minutes were the longest of his entire life. He had never been so nervous in his life before, not even the night before he'd gotten the serum. Right before they reached the airspace of New York City, Friday announced that Natasha was at 10 centimeters. Shit, she was giving birth and he wasn't there. How long did it take until a baby was born?!

Steve ignored Tony and already let the ramp of the jet down while the plan was still in the air and jumped down. He ran into the Tower and almost knocked over Sam who was waiting for him inside. He just heard Sam yelling that the baby wasn't there yet when he ran past by him to the medical wing of the Tower. He was sure that he'd never run so fast before.

He burst through the door and saw Natasha on the hospital bed, holding Pepper's hand who was murmuring to her.

"Steve!" She yelled through gritted teeth before she screamed.

"I can see the head!" Her doctor said in that moment and Steve wanted to look but Pepper called his name.

"Here, take your place, dad." She let go off Natasha's hand and stood up. "You're lucky you're in time."

He forgot to thank her for being there for Nat when he couldn't and just rushed to his wife's side. Her face was flushed and she was sweaty, but she'd never looked more beautiful. "This really sucks." She groaned. "I don't think I want that many children anymore."

"You're doing so great, sweetheart." He took her hand and kissed her forehead. "Natalia, I'm _so_ sorry that I almost missed it."

"I'm gonna make you pay for that later." She said before she had to push again. And then there was suddenly the scream of a baby and they both looked at each other. Their child was born.

"What a beautiful boy." The doctor said and laid the baby on Natasha's chest. A boy, they had a _son_?

Natasha looked down at their child and he'd never seen that look on her face before. She'd just looked so happy, she looked _beyond_ happy, she looked like she was finally at peace.

"Hi, my sweet little darling. I waited so long for you, my love." She pressed a kiss to the baby's head and then looked up at Steve. "This is our boy. This is _James_."

"He's perfect." He breathed out and placed his hand over Natasha's on their son. God, he felt so much love for his son. And for Natasha, it was like he fell in love with her all over again. This was everything. Natasha and James were everything. "Welcome to the world, James." He bent down to kiss his son on the head. I love you and your mommy so much. I promise I will always protect you and your mom. Always."


	10. Chapter 10

_This is truly the last part of the Hi series, I hope you enjoyed it._

* * *

_2023_

"Hi there, buddy." Steve cooed while he got a screaming James out of his crib. "I'm here. Are you hungry? Yes, you are, aren't you?" He pressed a kiss to James's forehead and walked out of the bedroom. "Mommy's having some me time, so you're gonna get a bottle, okay?"

James grimaced, causing Steve to think that his son sometimes understood them. James hated the bottle and preferred to get his food directly from the source, but Natasha was in her ballet studio at the end of the hallway, getting back into shape. Even though she looked perfect, but he wasn't going to tell his wife what to do with her body. He carried James downstairs to the kitchen to heat up the bottled breast milk. James gave him a wary look, probably suspicious that his mother wasn't taking him into her arms to feed him, but at least he'd stopped crying.

He put his son gently into the baby seat on the kitchen counter so he had his hands free to make James's food warm. Steve still couldn't sometimes believe it that they had a child now. The last three months had been like a dream. He loved James so, so much and his bond with Natasha had grown also stronger since they'd become parents.

He got the bottle out of the fridge and was about to put it in the bottle warmer when he heard Natasha.

"Is my boy hungry?" She asked softly and got James out of his baby seat.

"I can feed him with the bottle, if you want to go back upstairs." He offered, but he knew that Natasha would say no.

"It's okay." She smiled and kissed his cheek when she walked past by him to the breakfast nook. "I was done with my training anyway when I heard James." She sat down with James in her arms, pulling down the zipper of her sports bra. James made a happy sound and found Natasha's nipple almost on his own. His wife smiled down at their son and then looked up at Steve. God, she looked so beautiful with a baby in her arms. "He's already so big."

"I know." Steve smiled. "Half of his closet is too small for him by now."

"Yeah, we have to storage the clothes for his siblings." She said and helped James burp after he was done with his dinner.

"How many siblings is he gonna get?" He asked with a grin and Natasha grinned back. While Natasha wasn't too fond about child birth, she still wanted a big family. And he did, too.

"Well, I definitely want that little girl that you've been talking about." She kissed James's cheek and the baby giggled. "I love you, my sweet boy. So much." She walked over to him and he wrapped his arms around his wife and son, looking down at them. This was what life was about in his opinion. Family was everything and he had lucked out to have one with the prettiest and smartest gal. "And I love you, my darling."

"I love you, too." He smiled and kissed her softly.

"I'm gonna put James down for his nap and then I'm gonna take a shower." She looked up at him through her lashes and he licked his lips. "Do you wanna join me?"

"You know I do!" He growled quietly not to wake a dozing James.

She pecked his lips before she walked out of the kitchen, swaying her hips because she knew that he was watching her every move.

* * *

"Do we even like Tony that much?" Natasha asked him while they were lying on their bed with James between them. She rubbed his stomach and their son giggled happily.

He chuckled and blew a raspberry on James's tiny foot. "I don't want to leave him for a whole night as well, but it's Tony's birthday. And he's one of our best friends. And Rikki is great with James and we're only a phone call away, Nat. We have to leave the house without him from time to time."

"But he's so small and helpless." She kissed James on the forehead and he reached out his little hand to her and she pressed a kiss on his palm. "I don't think I can go. A mother can't just leave her son behind, Steve!"

He didn't really want to go to Tony's party as well, but he knew that they had to. Tony was their friend and they had to get used to the fact that they weren't going to be around their child 24/7. James was almost five months old and they'd managed so far that one parent was always with him if the other one had an appointment.

"You're not leaving him behind, sweetheart. We're probably gonna be back before midnight. And I think we need a little couple time for ourselves." He cupped Natasha's cheek. "We're not just parents."

She closed her eyes. "When did you become the one who's right?"

"I must have picked it up from my wife."

They managed to stay at Tony's party for two and a half hours until they wanted to go home. Natasha wasn't the only one who missed their baby. He just wanted to go home to their child and breathe in James's smell and nuzzle his face in his soft baby hair.

Rikki was doing her homework at the kitchen table, the baby phone next to her, when they got home and she told him that James had pretty much slept through. Steve briefly checked on James before he paid Rikki and walked her home. She and Bucky only lived a block away, but it didn't feel right to let a teenage girl walk home in New York at night.

Natasha had ditched her dress and heels for one of his shirts when he returned and lifted James up in her arms.

"He just woke up." She tugged James against her chest and the baby grabbed a strain of her hair to chew on it. "I don't think he even realized that his parents weren't home."

"Thank God, or he would have thrown a party." He joked and wrapped his arms around the two most important people in his life. "I missed him the whole time, but it was nice to do grown up things again, wasn't it?"

"Yeah, it was."

* * *

_2024_

It was James's first time at the Barton farm and it was such a joy to see his excitement about everything. He was still a little wobbly on his legs, but he loved to run through the big house, and to see all the animals on the farm. Steve was glad that they decided to visit Aunt Laura and Uncle Clint.

"Mama!" James wobbled towards his mother who picked him up with a big smile on her face. "Mooo!"

"Did you like the cows?"

"Mooo!" James clapped his hands. "Dada, moo!"

Steve laughed and ruffled his son's hair. "Are cows your new favorite animals? Liho won't like that!"

"Man, your kid is fast." Clint came into the kitchen. "One second he's looking at the cows and then the next second he just races off."

"Maybe you're just getting old." Natasha teased and bounced James on her leg who squealed happily. "Your uncle Clint is getting more gray hair each day."

"Hey, I'm not the one turning 100 this year, missy!"

"Do you know what you want to do for your birthday?" Laura asked and Natasha sighed. She'd talked with him about this before and she just wanted to spend the day with him and James, but she didn't want to upset their family and friends.

"Well, to be honest...not much. I just want a nice day with my two boys." She said and James blew a wet raspberry on her cheek, causing her to giggle. "You know that I'm not one for big birthday parties."

Laura smiled. "I know. And you can do whatever you want on your birthday, Nat. But I still like to visit you after your birthday for a nice girls weekend." She came closer to Nat and James and tickled James's tummy. "Cute boys are also invited."

"Oh, so what shall I bring?" Clint quipped and Steve laughed. He was pretty sure that neither he or Clint were invited.

"Oh honey, we both know that you're not a cute boy!" Laura sassed back and Clint stuck his tongue out.

* * *

"Come lay with me." Steve patted the spot next to him and James, who was asleep.

"In the biblical sense?" Natasha raised her eyebrow playfully. "You might wanna bring James to his room then."

"Haha. You know what I mean."

She grinned and laid down next to him and James, her hands placed on his tummy. James grabbed her thumb in his sleep and made a happy sound. "He's so tall already! I can't believe he's turning two soon!"

"I know." He agreed, turning to lie on his side. "So, how did you like your day, birthday girl?"

"It was perfect. I was with my two boys, what more could I want." She smiled at him. "Going to the zoo was a great idea, darling. And dinner was amazing. And thank you for the beautiful necklace."

"Anything for my girl." He was glad that she had enjoyed the day, because he hadn't really known what he could plan that would be fun for Natasha _and_ James since she wanted to spend the day with their son.

"_Anything_?" Her hand moved from James's stomach to Steve's chest and she played with the button of his Henley. She almost seemed a little bit shy. What was on her mind? What did she want?

"You know that I'll give you anything, you just have to ask, sweetheart." He promised her.

"I want another baby." She whispered softly and looked at him hopefully. "James isn't so little anymore and I don't want the age difference to be too big between them."

"Really?" He had been dreaming about another baby as well, but waited for Natasha to address the topic since it was her body. "I would love to have another baby."

Natasha beamed. "Yeah? We can try for your little girl this time."

"Sounds great!" He grinned back. "I'll quickly bring James to his room and then we can get started?"

Natasha laughed and smacked his chest. "I still got my implant, but I can get it removed tomorrow."

"I'll still take James to his room, so we can practice, babe. So we know what we have to do tomorrow." He winked at her and gently lifted their son into his arms. James stirred a bit, but he didn't wake up. He was really exhausted after the trip to the zoo.

"Then I better get naked." She teased, pulling her sweater over her head, revealing a new bra. "You still owe me birthday sex, my love."

He saluted her, his other hand holding James against his chest. "Yes, ma'am!"

* * *

_2028_

Steve was greeted by Liho when he walked through the front door and petted her head. She wasn't the youngest anymore, but still very agil and loved to play with the kids. He came home from dropping off James at preschool where he proudly told his friends that Captain America was his uncle. The Avengers had been on TV yesterday and it seemed like James had completely forgotten that _his father_ had been once Captain America as well. But then again, Steve couldn't fly and it looked pretty cool when Sam was in the air with the shield in his hands.

"Where are the girls?" He asked Liho who purred and then walked back to her spot on the cat tree. "Thanks for the answer, furball!"

He heard music coming from upstairs and walked up the stairs, already knowing where his girls were. He could see Natasha and Sarah in the dance studio because the door was open. Both were wearing tutus and Natasha moved gracefully to the music and Sarah tried to copy her. He smiled at the sight. Sarah looked just like her mother. While James was a mix of both of them, Sarah had inherited all of her looks from Natasha. She was only two years old, but she was already so bright and joyful. And her and James got along so well. They were thick as thieves and it just warmed his heart to see them together. God, he was so goddamn lucky. He had everything that he could ever want.

"Daddy!" Sarah had spotted him in the mirror and came running towards him. He knew that Natasha had been aware of his presence. "We dance!"

He knelt down to pick up his little girl. He just loved the way she beamed at him and he prayed that life would always be kind to her. "Hi, my little bug."

She scrunched her little nose. "Not a bug!"

"Yes, you are. My little lady bug. The cutest bug." He blew raspberries on her cheeks, making her giggle.

"Hi, my love." Natasha turned the music off and came towards them, giving him a quick peck. "Did James remind everyone again that Sam is his uncle?"

"You know it." He sighed. "It's like he doesn't even believe that I was the _first_ Captain America! The original one!"

Natasha gave him an amused look and took Sarah from him. "How about we get changed and then we go outside to cheer daddy up, Sarah?"

Sarah clapped her little hands. "Yay! See ducks!"

"I think Sarah wants to go the lake." He snickered and Sarah nodded her head.

"Then we'll get changed real quick and then we can go to the ducks, sweetie." Natasha kissed their daughter's head and walked out of the room. He followed them, offering to help Sarah get dressed. "I can do that, darling." She gave him a knowing look and let Sarah down who ran to her room with Liho in tow who had come upstairs. "I'm _pregnant_, not sick."

"I know, Nat." He said sheepishly. Of course his wife of almost fifteen years would see right through him. "But this time we have two little kids and your first trimester is always the worst and the kids don't even know yet that you're pregnant. I don't want anything happen to you and the baby."

"We're fine. Don't worry, my love." She kissed his cheek. "I feel great today. So great actually, that we should tire out the kids, so we can have a little fun tonight."

He laughed, shaking his head. God, he was such a lucky guy. He had two healthy and beautiful children, a third addition to the family was on their way, and he was still madly in love with his wife. Even after all this time. And she loved him back. She'd waited for him and she'd given him all he'd ever wanted.

"I love you, Steve." She whispered softly. "I've loved you from the moment I first saw you."

He cupped her beautiful face and kissed her. "I love you, my sweet Natalia."


End file.
